not mine, no affiliation. it might be haunted. comes with Kama Sutra
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Sept. 4, 2010 4:42 p.m. AngryCorvair UltraDork
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Sept. 4, 2010 7:20 p.m. SVreX PowerDork
Awesome. That guy should just give the darned car away and not worry about it.
There's a Madison Avenue high paying job waiting for him writing ad copy.
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Sept. 5, 2010 8:37 a.m. Luke SuperDork
Hahaha, brilliant
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C&P'ed before it disappears:
1998 Pontiac Sunfire: Your Wildest Dreams Have Come True
Impress your friends. Buy my E36 M3ty 1998 2D Sunfire Coupe, fancy teal-colored, standard transmission with under 98k miles for just under the cost of a used jet ski. So, the Kelly Blue Book value is $2495, which might have you wondering why this car is such an orgasmic prospect.
First, the good news: 1) New engine, under 15k miles on it. A new clutch from around the same time. I spent a lot of money fixing this POS. Take advantage of it. 2) Sunroof makes you look neat. 3) Can fit 4 people legally, though there have been 8 in it at once. If you roll deep, consider the lovely trunk space. 4) Manual windows and door locks provide great opportunity for calorie-burning. 5) Rear/side view mirrors offer extra-sensory visual abilities (ie, you can look behind you) 6) My landlord sprayed some chemical through the system that makes it smell new. Imagine the ladies: "Where did you get a BRAND NEW 98 sunfire? Do me right here." (Note: the backseat is pretty small, but I'll throw in a Kama Sutra book with purchase) (I am serious about that) 7) I vacuumed it out, just for you. 8) Glove compartment.
Otherwise: 1) The check engine light is on. I had a buddy come by and run the code check through it and it says it needs an O2 sensor. I'm a busy grad student. Do the math. Runs about $100, and you don't even have to do it, since all that it impairs is mpg and only very slightly. -$100 2) The dude who had the car before my sister (who I bought it from) thought a Sunfire is 2fast2furious material. He altered the stick, muffler and brake pedal. It sounds pretty lame, because it is. The car is a little loud because of this. You can change it for a few bucks, especially if you don't need to overcompensate for a small dick. Also, Vin Diesel blew out all the speakers but one. -$250 3) The hood is without a clear coat. It needs repainted. -$300(?) 4) The AC is broken. This is Michigan, do you really need it? -$250 5) It probably needs an oil change and a flock of about 50 crows have decided that it's their target. I can't promise anything but they might follow you around town, waiting for you to remove your guard so they can attack. It's crossed my mind. 6) I don't have tags on it anymore. I'm not paying 150$ a month for insurance for it to sit in my driveway. 7) I've smoked in it and touched people in it, and I guess there might be a poltergeist somehow associated with it (remember, the birds?). You get the point. I hate this effing car, get it out of my life.
SO. In closing, this car runs and other than the hood, it doesn't look like E36 M3. You needn't be a Christian to buy this car, but you must fear God with all your heart. I'm willing to discuss best offers. Stop by today to receive your free brochure*.
*Free brochure doesn't exist.
