What do you use for an assembly lube, assuming you don't have the real thing handy?
I know in rotaries Crisco works very well (no, really!) and you get the bonus fried chicken scent on the first startup!
What about conventional engines? I'm putting in some new cams (DOHC) and need something to lube 'em up!
I have borrowed an item or two from the bedroom to help with extremely snug hoses..
Wife found out....I'll never live that down
Motor oil in most cases. Cam lube is available. I used to use STP.
I used the "other" lube once for slider pins on a brake job. The funny thing is that's what she brought out when I asked her to grab me lube. 
Camshafts need a good cam lube. If you don't have cam lube (and I'm assuming it's a roller cam) then some good oil will work in a pinch. We used to use Lubriplate for everything in the military.
If you're building an engine, why don't you have assembly lube? You're not using Vice-Grips in place of a torque wrench, are you?
Well, fun discussion, but I lucked out and found a squeeze tube of Crane moly cam lube at one of the local parts stores.
After making a cam wrench (thinned down a 1" open end) we're off and running!
You want tsomething that'll stick, so I'd use either real live assembly lube or Vaseline and try to pour some oil over the cams immediately before startup.
S'okay, I used KY Jelly to install a windshield. Funniest part: my bud and I were on a little shopping trip that morning to get some stuff for the car. We pulled up at the drugstore and I started to get out, he says 'I'd prefer you stayed in the car.' Took me a moment to catch on. 
I've used a 50/50 mix of white lube and 20w50 engine oil many times in the past. I'd never use it on cam lobes. The proper stuff is necessary there.
Yeah, I'd use the right stuff for cam lobes. These days, even "good" motor oil isn't good enough for older valve trains, but that's a different discussion. I may still have some Isky Cam Lube around that came with a regrind I had done on the old Europa. I know I have some real engine assembly lube left over from the 220D. I have used Tri-Flo as assembly lube for everything except the cams. If it's good enough for a M16, hey....
