David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
6/20/17 2:52 p.m.

A little while back, I raced a bicycle through a shopping mall. No, it wasn’t a dream, nor revenge against holiday shoppers. And no, despite my chops, I wasn’t recreating the infamous Blues Brothers car chase scene. I was a last-minute entrant and, I admit, initially unwilling participant in something called the Tough Biker’s Race for Time, a time-trial bike …

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Lof8
Lof8 GRM+ Memberand Dork
6/20/17 2:58 p.m.

That sounds pretty fun! There is a nearly abandoned mall near me and I've been contemplating how to rip my motorcycle from one end of the interior to the other and then ride away, but thats sort of a different idea :)

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
6/20/17 3:03 p.m.

Yeah, similar but different. This was 100% legit. In fact, the race series is organized by the Orlando police.

ultraclyde
ultraclyde UberDork
6/20/17 3:04 p.m.

I've seen the videos of those races. Looks like a hell of a lot of fun!

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
6/20/17 3:10 p.m.

For future events, keep an eye on their Facebook page.

car39
car39 HalfDork
6/20/17 4:12 p.m.

There were two malls in my hometown, one torn down before the other was built. I got to drive in both of them for new car shows they would have there. One of my favorite stories was an older lady asked me how we got the cars inside. I told her they were special cars built for display. They disassembled into 4 parts, each one with it's own wheel so we could roll them in thru the regular doors. I told her if she looked closely, you could see the seams in the car where it went back together. She bought it so completely, she brought a friend over and showed her the "seams". I still don't know how I kept a straight face.

mndsm
mndsm MegaDork
6/20/17 4:15 p.m.

That's not far from me.

Also, I ran a 1995 rockhopper through Burnsville mall...once. no it was not a race. Yes, it was open. I continued to have conflict with that mall my entire tenure.

bmw88rider
bmw88rider GRM+ Memberand SuperDork
6/20/17 6:08 p.m.

Man....I keep seeing you post this stuff David and I'm bummed there isn't something like that close. Looks like a ton of fun.

ssswitch
ssswitch Dork
6/20/17 6:56 p.m.

That's a huge mall. Racing is a good use of floor space that would otherwise be wasted.

jere
jere HalfDork
6/20/17 9:05 p.m.

That looks like a blast!

But it would really get interesting if it was during store hours

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
6/20/17 10:07 p.m.

And I gotta give a plug for Chelsea. You can find her on social media at @fietsgodin.

92dxman
92dxman SuperDork
6/20/17 10:58 p.m.

They need something like that up here in the northeast

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
6/20/17 11:08 p.m.
92dxman wrote: They need something like that up here in the northeast

Organize it!! That's the way these things happen. True story: This evening I put together another local skatepark get-together. It's not quite the same as racing through a mall, but hopefully it will be a fun time.

Streetwiseguy
Streetwiseguy UltimaDork
6/21/17 7:59 a.m.

I can't believe nobody has said "The new Oldsmobiles are in early this year."

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
6/21/17 12:21 p.m.
Streetwiseguy wrote: I can't believe nobody has said "The new Oldsmobiles are in early this year."

Oh, believe me, it was going through my head just about the entire time.

dropstep
dropstep SuperDork
6/21/17 12:26 p.m.

I always wanted to ride through my old highschool before they tore it down. That had to be a blast.

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
6/21/17 12:32 p.m.

I knew that I had a photo somewhere. Here I am at the start. And, no, that's not my helmet.

phaze1todd
phaze1todd Dork
7/5/17 10:24 p.m.

Wrong tool for the job... here's the right tool for the job doing... well... the wrong job. [/URL]

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
7/13/17 5:31 p.m.
phaze1todd wrote: Wrong tool for the job... here's the right tool for the job doing... well... the wrong job. [/URL]

And crap, now I'll never know what the right tool is!

ncjay
ncjay SuperDork
7/14/17 6:00 a.m.

As much fun as riding a bicycle in a mall sounds like, I think about the average bicycle tire on a highly polished floor and my body already hurts from the crash.

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
7/14/17 8:49 a.m.

Man, that's some straight "Tony Hawk Pro Skater wish-fulfillment" E36 M3 right there!!!

4cylndrfury
4cylndrfury MegaDork
7/14/17 9:08 a.m.

3 things I take away from this video:
1. After seeing so many dashcam videos of auto racing, bike racing seems reaaalllly slow lol (no offense intended)
2. Apparently, all American malls look the same. You could easily convince me that mall was Tri-County mall here in Cincinnati, about 15 years ago (sadly, its now mostly a shell of its former self, with more ghetto DVD swap and airbrush shirt stores than legit chains).
3. I. NEED. TO. RACE!

I always had an itch to ride my BMX bike thru the mall after hours. I think this race needs to happen at a local to me mall, and soon. I saw you roll down the stair gap, and thought I could easily hop 6 steps on a 20" and save some time. Then I saw you grind out those climbs in the garage, and thought that maybe gears arent such a bad thing after all lol....

David S. Wallens
David S. Wallens Editorial Director
7/14/17 9:14 a.m.

Yeah, there was some debate as to the hot bike setup--more like a fun discussion as no one was taking this too seriously. I rode the mountain bike since that's what was offered to me.

Chelsea banked on her freestyle bike and was first after the initial runs. She was there just to have fun. Afterward, she wondered how she could have done on her race BMX--or her cyclocross bike, since that's what the eventual winner rode.

If I have the chance to do it again, I'd likely do it on my 22-inch BMX. It's just the bike that I'm most comfortable on. I have a cyclocross bike, too. Maybe that. I dunno. It was really fun, though, so that was the big thing.

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