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Woody
Woody MegaDork
8/21/12 6:35 p.m.

I'm sure all your friends have told you that you look fantastic, even though you're fifteen months pregnant.

You don't.

For the love of God, throw a tarp over that thing and leave the bikini at home. Or, throw it away. You'll probably never need it again anyway.

Thank you.

Sincerely,

Everybody Else

1988RedT2
1988RedT2 UltraDork
8/21/12 6:45 p.m.

But dude! All the pregnant movie stars are showing off their baby bumps these days!

What are you, old or something?

EastCoastMojo
EastCoastMojo UberDork
8/21/12 6:58 p.m.

Wow. Of all the places I'd expect to see this, I never thought GRM would be one.

PHeller
PHeller SuperDork
8/21/12 7:13 p.m.

We're good at saying the things that should (or shouldn't) be said.

Toyman01
Toyman01 PowerDork
8/21/12 7:19 p.m.

I read it the first time and laughed.

I read it the second time and said, "Oh crap, this isn't going to end well."

Woody
Woody MegaDork
8/21/12 7:25 p.m.

I like ECM and didn't intend to bum anyone out, so I considered going back and squashing this thread. But then I decided that I'd leave it up and take whatever beating I have heading my way.

EastCoastMojo
EastCoastMojo UberDork
8/21/12 7:26 p.m.

Don't take it down on my account. Just throw a tarp over it.

novaderrik
novaderrik SuperDork
8/21/12 7:28 p.m.

there is always the option of not looking..

bastomatic
bastomatic Dork
8/21/12 7:32 p.m.

My wife and all her pregnant friends want your pool's address Woody.

DrBoost
DrBoost UberDork
8/21/12 7:33 p.m.

Lots of people say "pregnant women are the most beautiful". I'm not one of those. I don't think they are unattractive by any stretch (no pun intended, good lord my wife is gonna kill me) but it doesn't make a woman more beautiful.

nocones
nocones SuperDork
8/21/12 7:34 p.m.

Let's see... As someone with a 8 month pregnant wife let me run down the options for her/you.
1. Do not do the 1 form of semi aerobic excercise late term mothers can do.
2. Purchase maternity swimsuit ($50-100+ they ain't cheap)so woody won't have to feel uncomfortable briefly at the pool.
3. Wear existing bikini which oddly is the only pre pregnancy clothing item that still fits normally for 0 dollars and as added bonus make woody uncomfortable.

I'm 110% confident you saw more inappropriate and disgustingly dressed non pregnant women and middle aged men than pregnant women anyway. Get over it.

Woody
Woody MegaDork
8/21/12 7:34 p.m.
bastomatic wrote: My wife and all her pregnant friends want your pool's address Woody.

Most of them already have it...

nocones
nocones Dork
8/21/12 7:38 p.m.

Also don't swimming pools usually have concrete patios around them?

Trans_Maro
Trans_Maro SuperDork
8/21/12 7:40 p.m.
DrBoost wrote: Lots of people say "pregnant women are the most beautiful".

That would be the same guy that told her "I'll only stick it in a little" 8 months ago.

As long as no-one is breastfeeding IN the pool, I'm fine. All those people have to look at me in shorts so we're even.

HappyAndy
HappyAndy Dork
8/21/12 7:43 p.m.
nocones wrote: Let's see... As someone with a 8 month pregnant wife let me run down the options for her/you. 1. Do not do the 1 form of semi aerobic excercise late term mothers can do. 2. Purchase maternity swimsuit ($50-100+ they ain't cheap)so woody won't have to feel uncomfortable briefly at the pool. 3. Wear existing bikini which oddly is the only pre pregnancy clothing item that still fits normally for 0 dollars and as added bonus make woody uncomfortable. I'm 110% confident you saw more inappropriate and disgustingly dressed non pregnant women and middle aged men than pregnant women anyway. Get over it.

QFT, and hilarity. And because Woody is probably one of those afore mentioned middle aged men.

dculberson
dculberson Dork
8/21/12 7:47 p.m.

Yeah, I'll agree that pregnant women shouldn't be at the pool once all the disgusting fat hairy dudes are banned too.

fasted58
fasted58 UltraDork
8/21/12 7:50 p.m.

A 15-16ish girl sporting a profound bump walked in the convenience store while I was gettin' my usual after work coffee this afternoon. She'd been smoking a cigarette previous to entering and bought a pack while there... I just wanted to slap some sense in her.

ransom
ransom SuperDork
8/21/12 7:50 p.m.
Trans_Maro wrote: All those people have to look at me in shorts so we're even.

Yeah, I have no nurturing-new-life excuse for my inelegant appearance in swim trunks.

And with that, I'm off for swimming lesson #2. Swimming may be a graceful sport, but my attempts so far are not.

logdog
logdog Reader
8/21/12 7:51 p.m.
dculberson wrote: Yeah, I'll agree that pregnant women shouldn't be at the pool once all the disgusting fat hairy dudes are banned too.

What about the dudes who look preggers?

SVreX
SVreX MegaDork
8/21/12 7:53 p.m.

I think they are very attractive.

I can't, however, recall any in bikinis.

Woody, I think you and I may hang out in different crowds.

z31maniac
z31maniac PowerDork
8/21/12 8:02 p.m.

I don't know, the assets get quite large......that's never a bad thing, right?

MrJoshua
MrJoshua PowerDork
8/21/12 8:04 p.m.

Come to Florida and hang out at the assorted "Springs". Our pregnant women in bikini's are 14-24 years old and don't look it anywhere except for the belly and chest. Did I mention that North Central Florida is a great place to adopt Caucasian babies.

Curmudgeon
Curmudgeon MegaDork
8/21/12 8:08 p.m.
dculberson wrote: Yeah, I'll agree that pregnant women shouldn't be at the pool once all the disgusting fat hairy dudes are banned too.

Hey, no need to drag US into this.

rotard
rotard Dork
8/21/12 8:10 p.m.
fasted58 wrote: A 15-16ish girl sporting a profound bump walked in the convenience store while I was gettin' my usual after work coffee this afternoon. She'd been smoking a cigarette previous to entering and bought a pack while there... I just wanted to slap some sense in her.

Where can a 15-16 year old buy a pack of smokes?

Marjorie Suddard
Marjorie Suddard General Manager
8/21/12 8:13 p.m.

In reply to Curmudgeon:

That's bizarre and disgusting. I mean, who has a CARP for wallpaper?

And Woody, look at the bright side: Those bumps mean those chicks totally do it. Which means, by default, that they absolutely want you.

Margie

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