and his Sham-Wow parachute was working fine until it started to rain. When that happened the Sham-Wow parachute soaked up all the water and...
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March 12, 2009 10:34 a.m. nickel_dime HalfDork
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March 12, 2009 3:20 p.m. Snowdoggie Reader
....exploded, leaving a trail of armadillo feces and Armor All across the sky. Al Gore was so angered by this defacement of the environment that he immediately....
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March 12, 2009 4:17 p.m. Jensenman MegaDork
...strapped a fossil fuel guzzling 747 to each foot and jetted all across the planet arousing his fellow hypocrites, er, environmentalists and they made everyone in the world quit using incandescent bulbs and replace them with mercury containing compact fluorescents. This worked well until they reached DILYSI Dave's house where....
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March 12, 2009 4:46 p.m. Toyman01 Reader
Dave immediately stole the engines off the 747 to install in his Mieta making it a MX-747. Dave then entered it in the Challenge and proved...
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March 14, 2009 8:42 a.m. Jensenman MegaDork
...that flat rate truly > hourly rate to get an army of slaves to build a Challenge car, unlike the clown's use of child labor. The car of course exploded the moment that the button was hit to snort flame from the bullhorns that poopshovel had craftily installed while no one was looking. The debris was scattered far and wide, earning Dave the coveted...
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March 14, 2009 10:01 a.m. mel_horn HalfDork
...Garret (Swarfalot) Jenkins Best Engineered Award, which had to be stripped from...
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March 14, 2009 2:15 p.m. neon4891 SuperDork
the designer of the GM "uni-stalk". As we all know...
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March 15, 2009 8:50 a.m. Jensenman MegaDork
...that guy then went to BMW to design the first iDrive. The universal hatred which greeted his 'discovery' shocked him so much that he tried to smack Chuck Norris upside the head. Then...
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March 15, 2009 2:37 p.m. 4cylndrfury Reader
...Mojo mistook chuck for Billy Mayes, and attempted to stab his eyes out. The problem is, Chuck Norris's eyes are actually made out of...
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March 15, 2009 2:49 p.m. EastCoastMojo Dork
silicone and angry armadillos, making the stabbing difficult and ineffective. The funny part was...
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March 15, 2009 4:09 p.m. Toyman01 Reader
...Chuck got such a kick out of this he tried to stab himself in the eye. Then he stuck the knife in his mouth and chewed it up creating...
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March 15, 2009 10:05 p.m. neon4891 SuperDork
a new version of the Bond bad guy, Jaws, but based off of Chuck Norris. This new version of Chuck was so power full that...
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March 15, 2009 10:16 p.m. EPN New Reader
he made the entire nation of Uzbekistan cower in his glory, and all he did was...
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March 16, 2009 4:21 p.m. neon4891 SuperDork
file a law suit
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March 16, 2009 4:25 p.m. Jensenman MegaDork
which billy3esq immediately took on. This girly car drivin' Esq had Chuck Norris' new persona...
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March 16, 2009 5:36 p.m. NYG95GA Dork
and name leagally changed to Lee Marvin, who was almost certain not to sue. Meanwhile,...
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March 20, 2009 10:18 a.m. nickel_dime HalfDork
in the deep dark depths of page three where this thread had fallen, the evil witch Hillery has cast a spell upon the earth. All women are now wearing pantsuits and...
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March 20, 2009 1:10 p.m. neon4891 SuperDork
Bill in utter dispear decided to look into the emerging market of sex-bots...
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March 20, 2009 2:16 p.m. Jensenman MegaDork
... which unfortunately are all made in China and the initial shipment was trapped by Somali pirates who wanted a $10 million ransom (plus 1/2 of the sexbots for themselves). Bill immediately...
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March 20, 2009 2:32 p.m. neon4891 SuperDork
realised the closest thing to his kind of woman was a drag queen. Oddly the first one he came across was Billy Mays clone #69 in a blue dress. The rest of the B.M. clones had already been killed by...
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March 20, 2009 2:44 p.m. EastCoastMojo Dork
a brutal stabbing to the eye.
Fortunately for Bill...
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March 20, 2009 8:10 p.m. Toyman01 Reader
Mojo's knife got stuck in the eye of the last clone giving Billy time to run like...
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March 20, 2009 8:38 p.m. EastCoastMojo Dork
...an angry armadillo right into the middle of the...
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March 20, 2009 9:27 p.m. Jensenman MegaDork
...New York City bus driver/rabid bicyclist confrontation where Wally...
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March 21, 2009 8:27 p.m. fastclown New Reader
World opens at 8 am. Lunch served today at the park is a Denny...
