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Stampie (FS)
Stampie (FS) UltimaDork
5/30/20 11:16 p.m.

I had a little eye opener this evening.  I thought Lil Stampie and I had discussed racism in the past.  Meaning I guess for what a Arabic friend of mine calls an average white guy I thought I was actively making sure he knew how racism was in America. 

For example last weekend I noticed he had a new lock screen on his phone.  It was a frog in a hoodie.  Lil Stampie has a hoodie addiction and he thought it was a cool pic that he identified with.  I told him to Google Pepe the Frog and see if it was the same image.  He was surprised that I knew the name of this random cartoon frog he found.  I then told him how Pepe the Frog had become a white supremacist symbol.  We had a talk not only about how "normalizing" happens but also how others might judge him wrongly if they saw that on his phone.  He was deleting the image as we spoke.

So that's a typical talk we've had over the last say 5 years once we've been able to have more understanding talks.  I was flipping through the channels tonight and the news was showing the protest going on locally.  He asked what was going on.  I explained the current situation and gave examples of us talking in this thread.  I realized that I had failed to ever explain that racism is mostly a hidden part of our society.  He was under the impression that there's a few shiny happy people out there that hate others but overall we're good as a country.  As I told him story after story he learned about hidden racism and unconscious bias and the history of oppression we've done but he had no idea.

If you truly care explain to your kids in a way you're comfortable (or uncomfortable as I was but needed to be) what racism means.  Not that shiny happy person waving a flag.  But that school built on the other side of town on top of the chemical dump while this side of town has beautiful schools.  Or that library that has all the old books while this section of town has the brand new remodeled library because  of "higher usage level."  Hopefully they'll understand.

Stampie (FS)
Stampie (FS) UltimaDork
6/4/20 4:31 p.m.

In reply to yupididit :

I thought about texting you personally but then thought maybe the answer would help others.

I have ran into mainly African American women who I'm trying to help while doing my job.  I sense a level of distrust of anything I say to the point I've had them call in to the company only to get told that what I said was right.  I totally understand why.  I'm sure they have been lied to and taken advantage of by white males their entire lives.  What if anything can I do to let them know I'm really trying to help?

yupididit
yupididit UberDork
6/4/20 6:04 p.m.
Stampie (FS) said:

In reply to yupididit :

I thought about texting you personally but then thought maybe the answer would help others.

I have ran into mainly African American women who I'm trying to help while doing my job.  I sense a level of distrust of anything I say to the point I've had them call in to the company only to get told that what I said was right.  I totally understand why.  I'm sure they have been lied to and taken advantage of by white males their entire lives.  What if anything can I do to let them know I'm really trying to help?

Best thing is to be genuine, be nice, do what you have to do to help them if that's your job. I don't know how old they are or their situation so I don't know. I experienced the same thing helping old white women before. One tried to run from me when I approached her with her wallet she left at the cashier. She took it,  gave me a look, and walked away lol. Didn't even say thank you. I made sure to loudly say "you're welcome" with a smile though lol. Honestly, be yourself and don't try too hard I guess lol. 

I know my grandma didn't dislike white people but she could never trust them either. But she grew up in rural Alabama in the 1930s, so I can only imagine. 

Stampie (FS)
Stampie (FS) UltimaDork
6/4/20 7:48 p.m.

Ok that makes sense.  I tend to be a blunt person.  I was thinking more like "Hey I understand why but please give me a chance to prove different."

OHSCrifle
OHSCrifle SuperDork
6/4/20 7:58 p.m.

In reply to yupididit :

I really appreciate the candor and honesty you've given this group of dorks. Truly believe you've opened some minds through your decision to stray from old broken benz stories to... life stories. Don't stop. 

NOT A TA
NOT A TA SuperDork
6/4/20 8:50 p.m.

In both Stampies and yupididit's examples the women might have acted the same way regardless of color/race/accent or whatever. Sometimes our perception is clouded by our own thoughts about how or why people react certain ways to us.

Floating Doc (Forum Supporter)
Floating Doc (Forum Supporter) UltraDork
6/4/20 10:26 p.m.

I know this is trite, but I have to say:

This is hard. It's going to continue to be hard. We must keep trying. 

ShawnG
ShawnG UltimaDork
6/4/20 11:08 p.m.

In reply to Stampie (FS) :

The white supremacists ruin everything.

I've worn Docs since highschool, I'm in my 40's now.

Always, 1460 boots, red laces, bar laced. It looks good.

Turns out, the white supremacists ruined that too. Never knew it was a thing for them until a couple years ago when a friend asked me why I wore boots like that.

SVreX (Forum Supporter)
SVreX (Forum Supporter) MegaDork
6/5/20 8:25 a.m.

I'm late to the party. I'm gonna refrain from comment until I've read the entire thread. 

AAZCD (Forum Supporter)
AAZCD (Forum Supporter) Dork
6/5/20 1:18 p.m.

In an increasingly polarized society, perception matters a lot more than fact. Many years ago I was in the USCG painting lighthouses. I used an airless sprayer and rappelled down the structure spraying it from top to bottom. It was a very messy job and I wore a white paper suit to keep from getting overspray on my uniform. I still got a paint on my face outlining my safety glasses. I got the bright idea of cutting a leg off of a suit and pulling it over my head as a hood with holes cut for my eyes and a slit for my mouth.

There I was walking past all the fishermen and kids on the pier carrying two buckets of red paint and wondering why I was getting all the hateful looks and kids being ushered away from my path. ...until one of my 'brothers' on the crew asked me why I was wearing a Klan outfit. This week, I'd probably get beaten senseless for such insensitivity.

I was very naive at the time and hadn't even thought of what I might represent to others.

GIRTHQUAKE
GIRTHQUAKE Dork
6/6/20 4:25 p.m.

Not to dredge up an old comment, but this one really tickled something in me: 

Javelin (Forum Supporter) said:

I feel like the "thin blue line" American flag perversions are a symbol for white power. The actions of my own neighbors surrounding the murder of George Floyd and their defense of his killer only reinforces that stance. I wonder if this is what regular Germans felt like watching the swastika's become more and more prevalent in the 1930's? 

It's becoming that way- the line flag anymore is just a general fist-pump for authority irregardless of who or what. Have you seen how many permutations there are? Or how they seem to have all the colors of the rainbow, but refuse to group them together? Maybe BLM should adopt the "Thin Black Line" just to see what reactions they get.

Honestly after watching it all unfold on shift (I never met her, but I was in the same city)- it was barely a week before people stopped asking why Kerrie Orzo was on shift 3 days after delivering a baby. Even other people I knew who asked the same question were slapping line stickers on their cars within a month; this weird fervor took over and suddenly people saluting me on duty was ratcheted up to 11 to the point where I couldn't leave a station without someone doing it. I hated when people "Thanked me for my service" before as if I didn't choose to help and work in EMS/healthcare; now, I'll only wear my ratty volunteer shirts when I'm at home. I'm not saying service should be thankless, but it all seems to hollow to me.

And the line appeared right after she died in duty too. Literally, maybe the 3rd day when people made the first batch of shirts? I feels too coincidental to me. Not to go to flounder territory, but I still feel like someone was waiting for an unwilling martyr like her to be the posterchild for blind authority support- after all, they have a face now.

Stampie (FS)
Stampie (FS) UltimaDork
6/6/20 5:10 p.m.

In reply to GIRTHQUAKE :

To be honest all of the altered flags bother me because they are changing the flag.  I just don't agree with changing the flag.  I don't like the ripped flag shirts or anything else that changes how the flag looks.  My first time seeing the blue line flag I thought it was a BLM flag.  My mind focused on the changing of the red to black instead of the blue line. When Kaepernick took a knee the first time I asked myself what I would do.  I didn't feel I could take a knee but I could understand him doing so.  Today at a protest we were asked to take a knee for the 5 minutes it took George Floyd to die.  I thought again about taking a knee during the anthem.  I think that now I would take a knee.

GIRTHQUAKE
GIRTHQUAKE Dork
6/6/20 5:38 p.m.

In reply to Stampie (FS) :

The American flag is such a commodity now it might as well just be used as a sales tactic. When everything is "Patriot Roofing" or "Freedom Home Inspections" I wonder if it means anything to these people anymore.

At the end of the day, changing the flag falls under the 1st Amendment- to the constitution, slapping on the thin whatever line onto it is the same as burning. It's just precatory under US flag code that you don't. As for the protest, I would too; I've protested in full gear before to make a point and after the fact, i'll do it until I die.

ShawnG
ShawnG UltimaDork
6/6/20 7:02 p.m.

Canadian here.

I've always found it funny how Abe Lincoln or George Washington was trying to convince everyone to "come on down!" and get a great deal on a new mattress for President's Day.

If our dead Prime Ministers were trying to sell us something, we would just assume they were ripping us off. They're thieving, lying politicians after all.

Brett_Murphy (Forum Patrón)
Brett_Murphy (Forum Patrón) MegaDork
6/6/20 7:30 p.m.

For those of you inclined to "count your blessings*" you might want to use a bit of that time to consider your privilege, even if it means reading up on what "white privilege" is considered to be. It might turn out that it's a blessing you never even knew your had. It might make you uncomfortable. That's fine, you'll get over it. 

Keep in mind that having privilege or not knowing you have it doesn't make you a bad person. Not knowing you have privilege is just another form of privilege. It makes you blessed. 

 

*Or, if you're not a big believer in blessings, like myself, you can ponder your fortunes, think of the ways you've gotten lucky, contemplate the things you've worked hard for, whatever. 

Snowdoggie
Snowdoggie Reader
6/6/20 8:11 p.m.
ShawnG said:

Canadian here.

I've always found it funny how Abe Lincoln or George Washington was trying to convince everyone to "come on down!" and get a great deal on a new mattress for President's Day.

If our dead Prime Ministers were trying to sell us something, we would just assume they were ripping us off. They're thieving, lying politicians after all.

Welcome to America. Soon enough somebody will be making a crap load of money selling "White Privilege" T shirts. devil

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