I've recently started learning that some people don't like being called "dude". Why is that, and where do these people live? Is this a regional thing? Or are these just folks who like being called "Sir" all the time?
I've recently started learning that some people don't like being called "dude". Why is that, and where do these people live? Is this a regional thing? Or are these just folks who like being called "Sir" all the time?
You can use Dooder, or El Dudearino if you're not into the whole brevity thing.
When i've seen people get offended by 'dude', it's usually because they think they deserve placement above the speaker (the 'dude user') in some social hierarchy that the speaker is not respecting by calling them 'dude'. They are usually shiny happy people who take themselves too seriously.
The original connotation is less than positive. One could also take exception to the informal aspect of being addressed as "dude".
I tell the teenagers at my church they can call me dude when we are in Wyoming or Montana riding horses.
It's a sign of disrespect. I personally don't like being called dude because it means you've put zero thought into who it is you're talking to.
Context matters. If I'm in a store and another customer says "hey dude, you dropped something." No biggie. If I'm in a store and the sales clerk says "what do you want dude?" I would probably be a little put off - even as an ordained minister of the Church of the Latter Day Dude.
I prefer "Chief" or "Bucko".
In case anyone needs some reading material: http://americanspeech.dukejournals.org/content/79/3/281.short
Abstract: "The patterns of use for the address term dude are outlined, as are its functions and meanings in interaction. Explanations are provided for its rise in use, particularly among young men, in the early 1980s, and for its continued popularity since then. Dude is used mostly by young men to address other young men; however, its use has expanded so that it is now used as a general address term for a group (same or mixed gender), and by and to women. Dude is developing into a discourse marker that need not identify an addressee, and more generally encodes the speaker's stance to his or her current addressee(s). Dude indexes a stance of cool solidarity, a stance which is especially valuable for young men as they navigate cultural Discourses of young masculinity, which simultaneously demand masculine solidarity, strict heterosexuality, and nonconformity."
I don't know if anyone else can access the whole article, but basically it's used as a sign of solidarity. Getting offended by it seems to indicate, then, that the person who got offended does not want 'solidarity' with the person using 'dude'. The reason is probably HEAVILY based on context, as Oldtin said.
Get over it dude
To clarify: 'dude' "encodes the speaker's stance to his or her current addressee". Meaning calling someone "dude" indicates that the speaker (dude-user) sees the person they are calling 'dude' as within some grouping or social status as themselves. People taking offense usually see themselves as different or higher in status than the dude-user. In some contexts, like a person working at a grocery store addressing a customer, dude won't be socially acceptible, but in some other context (like 2 people just talking face to face) dude-offense signifies, to me, a shiny happy person. Just one man's opinion.
Also a fun fact, the writer of that article took data of 'dude use' on a mass scale, assembling it into something called the 'Dude Corpus', possibly the greatest potential band name to come from any academic article, ever.
That's a term noone would self-apply where I come from.
Seriously, anyone who would get offended by being called "Dude" needs to back off on the caffeine or something. Who berkeleying cares?
It's like the word "Boss". Use carefully.
I don't mind "dude" but I typically respond with "yes sir"... just for the confusing looks it generates.
Maybe it's okay with your friends, but I would imagine most people don't like being called dude.
Rufledt wrote: "Dude indexes a stance of cool solidarity, a stance which is especially valuable for young men as they navigate cultural Discourses of young masculinity, which simultaneously demand masculine solidarity, strict heterosexuality, and nonconformity."
Am I the only one who sees a bit of a contradiction in "cool solidarity" and "nonconformity" both being part of the "cultural Discourses of young masculinity"? Reminds me of an exchange from an old MASH episode:
Hawkeye: "What's normal, Frank?
Frank: "Normal is everybody doing the same thing."
Trapper: "What about individuality?"
Frank: "Individuality's fine, as long as we all do it together."
Dude takes me back to the stoners in college that murdered the word.
Ask them which they prefer: Dude or berkeleystick.
berkeleying dude.
In my town, using the word dude will result in either getting your butt kicked for negative connotations, get you labelled as a hippie communist freak, or both.
So round here, its sir, ma'am, or "hey man".
02Pilot wrote:Rufledt wrote: "Dude indexes a stance of cool solidarity, a stance which is especially valuable for young men as they navigate cultural Discourses of young masculinity, which simultaneously demand masculine solidarity, strict heterosexuality, and nonconformity."Am I the only one who sees a bit of a contradiction in "cool solidarity" and "nonconformity" both being part of the "cultural Discourses of young masculinity"? Reminds me of an exchange from an old MASH episode: Hawkeye: "What's normal, Frank? Frank: "Normal is everybody doing the same thing." Trapper: "What about individuality?" Frank: "Individuality's fine, as long as we all do it together."
very true, but doing something that you think is nonconformist, and actually not conforming, are 2 different things. Think about hipsters, they are trying to not conform, but they are just creating a whole new conformity. Hippies did the same thing. And goths. There was a south park on that last one.
Forget about it
"Buddy" is the one that gets me more than any of the others.
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