To make a long story short, I went out with a gal on Saturday night and it was one of the better dates I've gone out on in a long time (she is outdoorsy, okay with getting her hands dirty and likes PBR out of a can). Her and I hung out again on Sunday and that went well too. I think that there is definitely potential between her and I. I've kinda been seeing what else is out there and i'm supposed to have a couple other dates looming in the next week or two. Do I go on with these looming dates or see what happens with the gal I was hanging out with all this past weekend exclusively?
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June 15, 2010 12:02 a.m. 92dxman HalfDork
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June 15, 2010 12:32 a.m. NYG95GA SuperDork
Go with the looming. you'll regret it later if you don't, and if #1 is what you think she is, she'll understand. Be open. Never lie. Just tell it like it is.
If she has a problem with that, she might not be what she appears to be. Better to find out now than to wish you had later. You're still young.. don't take it too seriously until you are sure.
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June 15, 2010 5:32 a.m. 914Driver SuperDork
Yeah, loom. If this girl doesn't work out you'll regret not shopping, besides, you look needy if you want to be exclusive after one date.
She likes it in the can, eh?
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June 15, 2010 6:20 a.m. Wally SuperDork
Have you ever seen a woman stop looking at shoes because she might have found a pair she likes?
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June 15, 2010 6:46 a.m. zomby woof HalfDork
NYG95GA wrote:
Go with the looming. you'll regret it later if you don't, if #1 is what you think she is, she'll understand. Be open. Never lie. Just tell it like it is.
That's some seriously bad advice right there.
Don't lie, but definitely DO NOT tell her anything. She doesn't need to know, and she won't understand.
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June 15, 2010 11:29 a.m. wlkelley3 HalfDork
zomby woof wrote:
NYG95GA wrote:
Go with the looming. you'll regret it later if you don't, if #1 is what you think she is, she'll understand. Be open. Never lie. Just tell it like it is.
That's some seriously bad advice right there.
Don't lie, but definitely DO NOT tell her anything. She doesn't need to know, and she won't understand.
Actually the wording should be "don't lie when confronted but don't volunteer info on the looming". She doesn't really need to know and she might not understand. A few do but only VERY early in, once becomes regular she won't understand. And obviously don't break a date with her to go looming.
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June 15, 2010 11:46 a.m. 3Door4G Reader
Wally wrote:
Have you ever seen a woman stop looking at shoes because she might have found a pair she likes?
Truth!
Have I ever stopped looking for a car because I might have found one I like?
I'd go with what everyone else said. You guys haven't had any discussion on being exclusive, so it's perfectly fine to go on these looming dates, and you'll be glad you did, even if it's just because you confirmed your suspicions that this gal is pretty goddam cool.
But no, don't tell her unless she asks. It's not that she won't understand this early in the game, women aren't dumb. But she doesn't want to know. And you don't either.
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June 15, 2010 12:15 p.m. poopshovel SuperDork
There's some critical information missing here.
How old are you?
What do you know about chicks 2 and 3?
Without that information, all other things being equal, that old golden rule comes in handy. Would you think less of chick 1 if she went out with 2 other dudes in the next week? If so, there's no harm in telling chicks 2 and 3 "I met someone I'm really into and out of respect for both of you, I'd like to see where it goes..." Not only is there no harm in that, but chicks 2 and 3 might swoon at the thought of you not being a total pig.
OTOH, if you're totally cool with chick 1 dating other dudes, and chicks 2 and 3 are down with the program, go sew them wild oats, boy. Alan Arkin's character in Little Miss Sunshine had some sound advice:
"Listen to me; don't make the same mistakes I made when I was young. berkeley a lotta women Dwayne, not just one woman, a lotta women."
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June 15, 2010 6:16 p.m. digdug18 HalfDork
92dxman wrote:
To make a long story short, I went out with a gal on Saturday night and it was one of the better dates I've gone out on in a long time (she is outdoorsy, okay with getting her hands dirty and likes PBR out of a can). Her and I hung out again on Sunday and that went well too. I think that there is definitely potential between her and I. I've kinda been seeing what else is out there and i'm supposed to have a couple other dates looming in the next week or two. Do I go on with these looming dates or see what happens with the gal I was hanging out with all this past weekend exclusively?
I hope your not trolling the bars in doylestown, there are not the best pickings around there. I found better dating on match.com years ago when I was dating. Like everyone else said, don't volunteer anything. I'd schedule as many dates per week as you can handle, I used to go for 2 a night, and I'd leave it open ended on the 2nd date in case something happened.....
Andrew
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June 15, 2010 7:25 p.m. autoxrs Reader
3Door4G wrote:
Have I ever stopped looking for a car because I might have found one I like?
Yes, but then someone might take that car you were originally looking at. Then you'll end up with some basket case and end up spending all your money to make sure it is running ok. I like exploring one car at a time, that way I don't end up trying to open the wrong door with the wrong key. If you do that you might get caught, then you'll have to explain what happened.
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June 15, 2010 7:39 p.m. 3Door4G Reader
I had to read that last post a couple times in order to take in all the awesomness.
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June 15, 2010 7:52 p.m. barnca Reader
im just glad im not datin these days.. always told my wife if we ever divorced she would never have to worry bout or son havin a "new"mom.. i would be all set...would never live with anyone again...not to say i wouldnt want a friend with benefits but she wouldnt be livin with me and when my kid was around she wouldnt be.
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June 15, 2010 7:54 p.m. autoxrs Reader
If women were like my cars...
'85 Straman CRX Si - she'd be a lesbo
'88 CRX Si (red one) - she'd be a cripple
'88 CRX Si (yellow one) - she'd be fun when she wasn't being a total bitch
'95 Civic LX (B16 swapped) - the kind you can take home to mommy and daddy, but is a freak in bed
'01 MR-S - drop dead gorgeous and bad E36 M3 crazy and would probably kill me
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June 15, 2010 8:04 p.m. JoeyM HalfDork
dating....I'm a fan of C-14
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June 15, 2010 8:09 p.m. Jensenman SuperDork
poopshovel wrote:
There's some critical information missing here.
How old are you?
What do you know about chicks 2 and 3?
Without that information, all other things being equal, that old golden rule comes in handy. Would you think less of chick 1 if she went out with 2 other dudes in the next week? If so, there's no harm in telling chicks 2 and 3 "I met someone I'm really into and out of respect for both of you, I'd like to see where it goes..." Not only is there no harm in that, but chicks 2 and 3 might swoon at the thought of you not being a total pig.
OTOH, if you're totally cool with chick 1 dating other dudes, and chicks 2 and 3 are down with the program, go sew them wild oats, boy. Alan Arkin's character in Little Miss Sunshine had some sound advice:
"Listen to me; don't make the same mistakes I made when I was young. berkeley a lotta women Dwayne, not just one woman, a lotta women."
Just make sure you safely wrap the old procreative derrick.
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June 15, 2010 8:18 p.m. Timeormoney New Reader
Keep the dates with the other chicks. 2 dates is not a relationship. After a month, you should have a better idea. I still recommend the old fighter pilot adage: if it berkeleys, floats or flies; rent it.
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June 15, 2010 10:36 p.m. 92dxman HalfDork
In reply to digdug18:
No bar trolling in D Town. I'm not much for cig smoking beer swilling bar girls. I use Match and Plentyoffish.com.
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June 16, 2010 9:11 a.m. Lesley SuperDork
~Shudder~ Plentyoffish is like going through an interview for a job you're not sure you really want.
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June 16, 2010 9:36 a.m. Xceler8x Dork
Get the good dater in bed and invite in one of your other prospects. They should then compete for your sexual attention while "entertaining" each other for your delight.
"Pics or it didn't happen" is the law.
Report back.
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June 16, 2010 9:47 a.m. zomby woof HalfDork
Lesley wrote:
Isn't that what dating is, for the most part?~Shudder~ Plentyoffish is like going through an interview for a job you're not sure you really want.
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June 16, 2010 9:48 a.m. Lesley SuperDork
Pretty much... guess that's why I'm still single.
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June 16, 2010 10:20 a.m. nickel_dime Dork
Lesley wrote:
Pretty much... guess that's why I'm still single.
Attractive, intelligent, talented and likes cars. Guys up there must REALLY be out to lunch.
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June 16, 2010 10:25 a.m. poopshovel SuperDork
Oh shnaps, I smell GRoMance.
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June 16, 2010 12:04 p.m. zomby woof HalfDork
nickel_dime wrote:
Lesley wrote:
Pretty much... guess that's why I'm still single.
Attractive, intelligent, talented and likes cars. Guys up there must REALLY be out to lunch.
See the 'dear women' thread
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June 17, 2010 5:19 p.m. NYG95GA SuperDork
A wise man once said:
" One must have dated a woman of great intellect to know what pleasure there is in dating a fool."
I'm not a wise man.. but I couldn't have said it better myself. The girl that I live with is as dumb as a bag of hammers, and sweeter than fresh sugar cane. I wouldn't trade her for a Miata. We're both in our mid fifties, where priorities change to the practical side. Neither of us has ever been married.
I recommend "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars" by John Gray. It's very illuminating.
