Woody wrote: That sucks, but it's better that it ended before it got too complicated. I had a professor in college who said, "Be careful what you wish for when you're in your twenties; you might have it when you're in your thirties and you might not be able to get rid of it when you're in your forties". You can apply that to any aspect of your life.
You just described my MGB GT! He was one wise Mo-Fo
mtn wrote: Is it really that bad for most folks? Maybe it is because the things that I want to do involve cars, guitars, boats, and hockey, while the things she wants to do involve shopping, concerts, boats, and ice-skating... But are all your relationships really that one-sided?
Mine aren't. I could never get them to last long enough for E36 M3 like that to come up. And as it stands now I'm getting close to a decade sans relationship.
Your 4 years beats my 0.
mndsm wrote: It sure as hell isn't for me, my wife is the one shopping for plane tickets so I can do the fly and drive to get the latest acquisition. She's also not even fussed when I pulled the "Ima go get a car I'll be back later" bit. That was her warning when I bought the mx6. She ALSO convinced me to buy the ms3 under the auspices of "you're not going to be happy til you have the turbo one, so just do it right now". It's pretty well documented my spouse ranks pretty damn high on the awesome scale, even if she is the bane of my existence some days.
This. There are days where my wife and I want to do a Homer Simpson style strangle hold on each other, but that's because we have similar type personalities. She has supported me through countless cars, my constant bitching about wanting to go racing...and is in full support of me now that I am racing and is a wonderful mother to our 3 kids. It doesn't hurt that she has similar interests to mine...she likes cars, sports and is into health and fitness.
To the OP, sorry to hear about the end of the relationship. Take some time to get yourself into the right mindset and get passed this. If you're ready to start another relationship, go for it.
Oh, and boobs can never be overrated...big, small or in the middle.
I bail pretty fast at the first warning sign. I don't tolerate that E36 M3.
In reply to rotard:
I guess if you're looking to be single a lot, than that's fine. But if you ever want to be married, it doesn't work that way. I tolerate plenty of E36 M3 from my wife, and frankly she probably tolerates more of it from me than I do from her. But in less than 2 weeks, we'll celebrate 17 years being together (15 married). It's a give and take. On the whole, things are great and we have a wonderful relationship. But with two hard nose personalities, we both have had to learn to tolerate E36 M3.
mtn wrote: Is it really that bad for most folks? Maybe it is because the things that I want to do involve cars, guitars, boats, and hockey, while the things she wants to do involve shopping, concerts, boats, and ice-skating... But are all your relationships really that one-sided?
People in good relationships have no need to talk about how great things are. Unfortunately, you wind up with weird expectations when 90% of the relationship stories you hear are coming from one half of a miserable pair.
But you don't want to hear about how utterly uneventful and stress free last night was. We made dinner, read some stories to the kids, watched some TV, ate some pie, did some laundry and went to bed and did some good bed stuff. That's how things have tended to go most nights, with some obvious changes since we started dating 17 years ago in high school.
Klayfish wrote: In reply to rotard: I guess if you're looking to be single a lot, than that's fine. But if you ever want to be married, it doesn't work that way. I tolerate plenty of E36 M3 from my wife, and frankly she probably tolerates more of it from me than I do from her. But in less than 2 weeks, we'll celebrate 17 years being together (15 married). It's a give and take. On the whole, things are great and we have a wonderful relationship. But with two hard nose personalities, we both have had to learn to tolerate E36 M3.
There's a difference between a relationship always being about the other party and compromise. I don't have an issue with compromise; it's a part of any healthy relationship. If it ever starts to always be her way or the highway, I send her down the highway. Constantly sacrificing who you are and what you enjoy doing for someone else is not a good life to live. It's a mistake that I only had to make once.
My wife bought my 944- the car that completely spawned my obsession with vehicles. To this day, she says it was the biggest mistake she's ever made.
She's still around though, so...
I've been dating the current girlfriend for 1.5 years. Things have changed in interesting ways.
When we first started dating, she was not nearly as attached as she is now. I attribute this to her being from a divorced family (lived with her mom until 12 and then with her dad and stepmom). On top of that, her mom has.. issues. So she's never really had love like someone deserves. Her stepmom is mental, but nice around people not in the family. Her dad cares, but more of in an "uncle" way then a true dad way IMO.
I think she's getting used to the idea of being with someone she can trust to always do right by her. Which makes her feel safe to be a bit more needy. Which is fine, while I like someone who can do things for herself, there is nothing wrong with "needing" or maybe better put "wanting" someone to help.
I've gone through 5 vehicles since dating her. Just had my civic stolen. She puts up with me, which is a wonderful thing as I know I can be a difficult person. I put up with her quirks. Sometimes, we fight (only had two big fights so far), but they've never been fights because of someone being spiteful/ill-intent. Usually just frustration over someone not realizing/being ignorant of their actions. She has always been supportive of my racing. She hates it more when I have to go away for work haha.
"to get over one, you must get under another." now there's an idea i can get behind.
Under, behind, whatever.
If you're lucky, you can get under a couple at the same time.
ppdd wrote: People in good relationships have no need to talk about how great things are. Unfortunately, you wind up with weird expectations when 90% of the relationship stories you hear are coming from one half of a miserable pair. But you don't want to hear about how utterly uneventful and stress free last night was. We made dinner, read some stories to the kids, watched some TV, ate some pie, did some laundry and went to bed and did some good bed stuff. That's how things have tended to go most nights, with some obvious changes since we started dating 17 years ago in high school.
This is the truth, it'd be like one of us coming onto the forum and bragging that our car started and we got to work (assuming it's not one of the 40 year old, stringed together with bailing wire and duct tape jobs running around here :)).
My relationship is great with my wife, she's an amazing mother, supportive of my racing habit and tolerant of my other faults... We've been together for 14 years, married for 6...
When I started putting my wife's happiness ahead of mine, she started putting my happiness above hers. It works well for us.
We're not perfect, and having kids have made us closer than ever, but made things harder than ever. We're both committed, and I hope we always stay that way. We're not perfect. We can both be a major pain in the ass. We both have our faults, but I've shared some awesome times with her that I wouldn't trade for 500 cars. I'd choose my wife and kids over the car shenanigans in a New York minute.
That said, cars are a huge part of my life. I don't think my wife will ever fully understand. I pray my daughters will. The way I have made things work is parting cars. I give the family 80% of the profits, buy stuff for my car as needed. The wife has gone from frustrated with my car hobby to telling me to "buy what makes you happy."
/rambles.
Grizz wrote: If you're lucky, you can get under a couple at the same time.
You don't have to be lucky. Just save up all that dinner and movie money ya waste tryin' to get lucky. Spend it on some proper workin' girls.
Or ask Curtis, he seems to know how to make that happen.
In reply to Giant Purple Snorklewacker:
I live near Baltimore, I don't think proper is the right term for the ones down there.
Grizz wrote: If you're lucky, you can get under a couple at the same time.
It's too much work. One at a time is plenty. 
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