I think I'm taking a road trip. I have friends (and you fine folks) in a few cities I'd like to check out. I'm going to see a friend in W/S NC at which point I can check out Asheville. Then I have a friend (going through a breakup as well) in Marietta GA so I can check out ATL. Then I'll head back to my old stomping grounds in Austin to see if I "get the sensation" or if it doesn't feel right anymore.
holler if you change routes and loiter in the Central FL area.
curtis73 wrote: I think I'm taking a road trip. I have friends (and you fine folks) in a few cities I'd like to check out. I'm going to see a friend in W/S NC at which point I can check out Asheville. Then I have a friend (going through a breakup as well) in Marietta GA so I can check out ATL. Then I'll head back to my old stomping grounds in Austin to see if I "get the sensation" or if it doesn't feel right anymore.
Sounds like a plan. October is a good month to hit all the cities you just listed. You can get a lot of thinking done while the country spools by out the window.
My offer is still good to join me with the MINI, if you'd like to head to the $2013 Challenge.
I'm a couple of hours south of ATL, and a couple of hours north of G'ville. Guest room and a decent shop.
I'm sure you can find plenty of support, suds, and senseless automotive inanity to get you on track there.
You should still try to make it out to portland at some point, it sounds like it would fit you extremely well, either way good luck with everything
curtis73 wrote: I think I'm taking a road trip. I have friends (and you fine folks) in a few cities I'd like to check out. I'm going to see a friend in W/S NC at which point I can check out Asheville. Then I have a friend (going through a breakup as well) in Marietta GA so I can check out ATL. Then I'll head back to my old stomping grounds in Austin to see if I "get the sensation" or if it doesn't feel right anymore.
If you are near NOLA on the Northshore of Pontchartrain, shoot me a PM and I will buy you an Abita at the factory.
slefain wrote: Has Atlanta been mentioned yet? Over on the east side is pretty open minded, mainly around Decatur. Good beer, good music scene, a few Pull-A-Part yards, and decent weather.
Consensus from my gay friends: ATL is very, very close to the bottom of the list as far as gay-friendly/hip/cool. Being totally honest, and this is coming from gay friends, black friends, etc, 1. Even though it's the "big city," it's still squarely in the bible belt. 2. Atlanta is a chocolate city, and GENERALLY speaking, black folks are REALLY not big fans of gay folks. Note: I did not say ALL black folks. Please don't flame me. I'm just being straightforward.
curtis73 wrote: I think I'm taking a road trip. I have friends (and you fine folks) in a few cities I'd like to check out. I'm going to see a friend in W/S NC at which point I can check out Asheville. Then I have a friend (going through a breakup as well) in Marietta GA so I can check out ATL. Then I'll head back to my old stomping grounds in Austin to see if I "get the sensation" or if it doesn't feel right anymore.
Feel free to hit me up when you're in the ATL area.
curtis73 wrote: I think I'm taking a road trip. I have friends (and you fine folks) in a few cities I'd like to check out. I'm going to see a friend in W/S NC at which point I can check out Asheville. Then I have a friend (going through a breakup as well) in Marietta GA so I can check out ATL. Then I'll head back to my old stomping grounds in Austin to see if I "get the sensation" or if it doesn't feel right anymore.
Please let me know what you think of W/S NC. I went to college there (many years ago) and went back recently for homecoming. The downtown area is amazing now! I was blown away. From the little time we spent there, it seems like W/S is doing a fantastic job of becoming cool.
Curtis,
If you're heading south, try a stop here on the Delmarva Peninsula. A lot of Ls and Gs (Don't know about the rest.) have made Rehoboth Beach their home.
Seems to meet your criteria, but there's not much of a job market here. ...at least not in the off-season.
If you (or anyone, for that matter,) are in the area, drop me a line. We can manage to play tour-guide if necessary.
Keith
SVreX wrote: My offer is still good to join me with the MINI, if you'd like to head to the $2013 Challenge. I'm a couple of hours south of ATL, and a couple of hours north of G'ville. Guest room and a decent shop. I'm sure you can find plenty of support, suds, and senseless automotive inanity to get you on track there.
Aussie Steve and I will be heading down from Ohio to the Challenge.
Curtis, Join Us!
We will be traveling via Quad Cab pickup so we have more than enough space.
This is a serious offer. Feel free to PM Steve or me for further details.
JohnRW1621 wrote:SVreX wrote: My offer is still good to join me with the MINI, if you'd like to head to the $2013 Challenge. I'm a couple of hours south of ATL, and a couple of hours north of G'ville. Guest room and a decent shop. I'm sure you can find plenty of support, suds, and senseless automotive inanity to get you on track there.Aussie Steve and I will be heading down from Ohio to the Challenge. Curtis, Join Us! We will be traveling via Quad Cab pickup so we have more than enough space. This is a serious offer. Feel free to PM Steve or me for further details.
No Mongo?
SVreX wrote: I have tried to focus only on places that meet the criteria. I find it interesting that so many people said Portland, or PNW, yet seemed to miss the part about "I hate winters". So, it's OK to suggest something that does not meet the criteria, as long as we are supportive of LGBT? I'm sad that ronholm is getting beat up in this thread. I realize he is offering opinions that were not asked for, but I admire his courage to offer input that he honestly believes will help Curtis, not just help Curtis find trouble (which appears to be what some people are offering). ronholm has offered a dissenting view. I respect that. Cutting him down for his courage in presenting it is much more intolerant than anything he has done.
Perhaps ronholm shouldn't recommend opening ones mind to all possibilities and then refer to people different than himself as "degenerates." That tends to turn people off to the conversation regardless of whatever good intentions he may have.
mattm wrote:SVreX wrote: I have tried to focus only on places that meet the criteria. I find it interesting that so many people said Portland, or PNW, yet seemed to miss the part about "I hate winters". So, it's OK to suggest something that does not meet the criteria, as long as we are supportive of LGBT? I'm sad that ronholm is getting beat up in this thread. I realize he is offering opinions that were not asked for, but I admire his courage to offer input that he honestly believes will help Curtis, not just help Curtis find trouble (which appears to be what some people are offering). ronholm has offered a dissenting view. I respect that. Cutting him down for his courage in presenting it is much more intolerant than anything he has done.Perhaps ronholm shouldn't recommend opening ones mind to all possibilities and then refer to people different than himself as "degenerates." That tends to turn people off to the conversation regardless of whatever good intentions he may have.
Look!!! Here is what I said...
Hateful unwelcomed Bigot said: Now... I suggested this place because I have a friend who is the pastor of a very different church... IMO he is off the rails a little bit... But at is his core, and despite our differences he is a very good and very decent man... http://www.plymouthlawrence.com/who/about/ If not this... for your own sake find something like this... At least for a little while.... Or maybe not in a church... Just find these kinds of people...... Don't rush out exposing yourself to a scene who at the bottom level is very degenerate... They will take you down with them.. Just pull you right to the very bottom so fast you won't know what hit you....
The Church the Bigot offered up said: We declare Plymouth Congregational Church to be an Open and Affirming Church, welcoming all persons, regardless of gender, race, physical or mental ability, economic status, marital status, age or sexual orientation.
Now... You will please flip'n note this church I offered has a value system which while different from my own, offers something I feel which is very good and decent. I also quite clearly and honestly noted this church is lead in part by a person which I call a friend, and am certain would reciprocate those feelings..
Stating that the bottom level of the crowd I feel he may be looking for is very degenerate (LGBT or not) isn't to say anyone who lives their life in such a manner is degenerate.... Good greif...
Bourbon street is full of degenerates... This is what I would hope ya'll as his friends would help him steer clear of right now.... This is what I am saying..
Sorry... But if you folks were not so quick to judge me... Or have yourselves pigeon holed into some pretty narrow minded versions of what is really opened minded.. We wouldn't be having these problems...
SSSSSOOOOO glad to hear Curtis say he doesn't feel like he needs run right out and get laid.. but still say he needs to guard himself closely... and have friends around him who aren't afraid to tell him to steer left or right as needed to stay out of trouble... "anything goes so long as you ain't trying to put it in me".... it just ain't all it is cracked up to be when you need a friend you can count on in a hard time.
ronholm wrote:mattm wrote: Perhaps ronholm shouldn't recommend opening ones mind to all possibilities and then refer to people different than himself as "degenerates." That tends to turn people off to the conversation regardless of whatever good intentions he may have.Look!!! Here is what I said...Hateful unwelcomed Bigot said: Now... I suggested this place because I have a friend who is the pastor of a very different church... IMO he is off the rails a little bit... But at is his core, and despite our differences he is a very good and very decent man... http://www.plymouthlawrence.com/who/about/ If not this... for your own sake find something like this... At least for a little while.... Or maybe not in a church... Just find these kinds of people...... Don't rush out exposing yourself to a scene who at the bottom level is very degenerate... They will take you down with them.. Just pull you right to the very bottom so fast you won't know what hit you....Stating that the bottom level of the crowd I feel he may be looking for is very degenerate (LGBT or not) isn't to say anyone who lives their life in such a manner is degenerate.... Good greif... Bourbon street is full of degenerates... This is what I would hope ya'll as his friends would help him steer clear of right now.... This is what I am saying.. Sorry... But if you folks were not so quick to judge me... Or have yourselves pigeon holed into some pretty narrow minded versions of what is really opened minded.. We wouldn't be having these problems... SSSSSOOOOO glad to hear Curtis say he doesn't feel like he needs run right out and get laid.. but still say he needs to guard himself closely... and have friends around him who aren't afraid to tell him to steer left or right as needed to stay out of trouble... "anything goes so long as you ain't trying to put it in me".... it just ain't all it is cracked up to be when you need a friend you can count on in a hard time.
Looks like Curtis indicated that he was looking for the following:
Accepting LGBT scene (usually an indicator of the social timbre of an area) High hippie quotient
Calling any part of that scene degenerate is not helpful in this instance. If you want to tell him to get closer to God and repent for his sins, perhaps this is the wrong thread. If you want to tell him to come to Kansas I would stipulate that his requirements preclude any such travel and that he is certain to find a welcoming church, and a much more welcoming populace than Kansas, in any area that has already been suggested.
You said, "But if you folks were not so quick to judge me...
but that is exactly what you did by using the word degenerate. By using that word you are judging a portion of the population that is different than you. Nobody denigrated the religious, or the monogamous in this thread. Why must you insist that you are only trying to help while referring to those friends or acquaintances of Curtis as degenerate. That is where your argument loses traction and also where you prove all of the stereotypes of right wing religious types correct.
Curtis didn't denigrate anyone at all in his request for help. I have to wonder why you found it necessary to denigrate those people that Curtis may call friends.
Hey guys. We've traveled well into the territory of slinging long insults back and forth. This ain't helping. There is no one person to blame, and I'm sure the situation got out of hand from what the people trying to offer advice intended. But let's try to dial this back.
If you're feeling slightly vitriolic, could maybe look back at some of your latest posts and consider if they are actually constructively directed towards our friend Curtis here? If they are not helpful, please consider deleting them.
Thanks.
<img src="
" />
curtis73 wrote:ronholm wrote: you are being very dishonest with yourself right now... anyone would be given the amount of pain you must be going through.... Look man... Having an open mind means having an open mind!!!! Don't close your mind to old standards simply because you have some weird notion of what is right because you can call it open minded or progressive... I have found quite often the people who claim their minds are the most open are often very closed up to ideas which differ from there own and admitting that I fall into this trap often also.... Don't be like me... authentically open your mind..Let's just agree to disagree. To me, monogamy is strictly a social construct. If I were to start believing that monogamy were right, it would be closing my mind to an enlightenment I've known for two decades. I read all of that monogamy stuff and think, "isn't that quaint?" And saying that my "scene" is degenerate isn't a good way to win me over to your argument. I appreciate your attempt to help, but I just politely disagree.Now... Listening to you talk about this third wheel.... YOU ARE NOT putting this person humanly on the same level in the relationship as you place your wife... I am going to go a bit further and say you probably placed yourself in a lower standing than this third wheel from time to time also... This from not only you being manipulated by your wife, but also from you manipulating yourself... Creating these types of levels is a very bad deal.... Hell... I can agree with you it wasn't the "boning two chicks" that actually caused the breakdown of your marriage... It was the very idea that boning tow chicks wouldn't harm the marriage which caused the harm... and that seed was planted long before the third entered your lives..... When I first encouraged you to not seek the LBGT and "party" scene in this thread it wasn't because I believe all of these people are inherently bad.. It is just that in your current emotional state you are going to do things far outside the realm of what even you define as right and wrong... and even should you leave out the LGBT element, actively seeking the party scene at this fragile point in your life is only going to serve to drag you further down the wrong road.... If not this... for your own sake find something like this... At least for a little while.... Or maybe not in a church... Just find these kinds of people...... Don't rush out exposing yourself to a scene who at the bottom level is very degenerate... They will take you down with them.. Just pull you right to the very bottom so fast you won't know what hit you.... Please... Understand you shouldn't trust yourself right now... So you must work extra hard at finding the strongest most decent people, and allow them to lift you up... Your version might differ from mine... Heck... It looks like you have a couple offers right here in this thread.... Take them up on it... You know you ain't going to find what you need to heal on Bourbon St......
Curtis posted this a couple of pages ago, yet some people continue to provide "helpful" advice.
Beer Baron wrote: If you're feeling slightly vitriolic, could maybe look back at some of your latest posts and consider if they are actually constructively directed towards our friend Curtis here? If they are not helpful, please consider deleting them.
Well put. It is always better if people delete their own obnoxiousness....
mattm wrote: Perhaps ronholm shouldn't recommend opening ones mind to all possibilities and then refer to people different than himself as "degenerates." That tends to turn people off to the conversation regardless of whatever good intentions he may have.
I would agree, if he had done it.
He didn't.
He has worked his butt off to try to be respectful to something he obviously disagrees with- give him a little credit. It's a lesson a lot of people could learn from. Don't expect him to be perfect.
Is "degenerate" really all you got from all of his efforts? That's pretty sad. (and not very open minded)
mattm wrote: Calling any part of that scene degenerate is not helpful in this instance.
Why do you assume ronholm was specifically referring to the LGBT scene, and not the "party" scene that Curtis is also seeking out? And don't kid yourself, almost every scene has a degenerate 'part' that people going through tough times can be especially vulnerable to...Even the automotive/racing scene.
mattm wrote: but that is exactly what you did by using the word degenerate. By using that word you are judging a portion of the population that is different than you. Nobody denigrated the religious, or the monogamous in this thread. Why must you insist that you are only trying to help while referring to those friends or acquaintances of Curtis as degenerate. That is where your argument loses traction and also where you prove all of the stereotypes of right wing religious types correct. Curtis didn't denigrate anyone at all in his request for help. I have to wonder why you found it necessary to denigrate those people that Curtis may call friends.
Look friend.... Saying that there are degenerate people out there is simply a matter of reality.
and my plea was for Curtis to be EXTRA mindful of that... My goodness... if the dude was talking about seeking out Scientology... or becoming a JW... Or Muslim... Mormon.... Or even just wanting to find a more mainstream Christian or religious environment I would be doing the same freaking thing... Encouraging him to keep a watchful eye out for degenerates and false senses of what is good and right... Even among those I am more inclined to agree with.
Again... he needs to make sure he isn't looking for trouble, and needs have friends around to make sure his compass which defines such things is steering him true...
There are degenerates in the Cleaver community, as there are degenerates in the LGBT community and party crowd........ correct????
as friends you seek to protect Curtis from a perceived 'degenerate' such as myself... Just make sure he doesn't fall to far off the other side.... okay???
Different opinions are, ...well...different.
To Curtis, his lifestyle is "enlightened". To others, perhaps they would consider him "deceived". Those two viewpoints are fundamentally different.
But being different doesn't make one right.
Being "open minded" means honestly considering a viewpoint that is different than your own. It doesn't mean looking at opinions that are different than your own with disdain because they are not as "open" as you.
I can actually accept ronholm's message. I think he has my best health in mind. I don't find his ideas to be selfish or hateful. I may not necessarily agree, but there is a lot of love in his words.
In fact, all of you have offered what you can from your own heart and with the best of intent. I don't judge any of it.
Its so refreshing to have so many people (who have never even met me) jump to my aid. Seriously. It makes me feel loved at a time that I'm not really feeling the love at home 
curtis73 wrote: I can actually accept ronholm's message. I think he has my best health in mind. I don't find his ideas to be selfish or hateful. I may not necessarily agree, but there is a lot of love in his words.
Props y0!
You'll need to log in to post.
