ethical question part II

I have never been cheated on that I know of, but if I ever was to be cheated on and found out, man, would that be a E36 M3storm. I would never wish it upon any person, because I know how I would take it. What would GRM do if they saw a friend who had a boyfriend making out with another guy? My friend and I are both from North America and are on a study abroad but that whole different zip code thing is stupid. Do I mind my own business or tell the boyfriend? I think I would want someone to tell me if I had a girl who was fooling around but also it is none of my business right?

Edit: Not sure if it matters but its a long term, currently long distance relationship and I have never personally met the boyfriend

Personally, I wouldn't want to get involved if I were in your position, but I would damn sure want someone to tell me if I was in the boyfriend's position. That's quite a pickle you're in there.

Having been the person who didn't know my ex was f-ing around (even though everyone else did), the bf deserves to know something is up.

Since it sounds like you're primarily the 'friend' of the cheating-on rather than the cheated-on. Why not talk to your friend who is doing the cheating about what she's doing and how you feel about it? If her path in life doesn't coincide with your own moral values, you may want to reconsider your friendship with her. But it is not really your place to rush in and specifically tell her boyfriend, especially not without giving your friend the opportunity to come clean herself first.

I'm a pacifist. Its none of my business. But I often times find a way to "tell" them without "telling" them, if you catch my drift. I might have a conversation about cheating and parlay it into, "so do you think xxxx would cheat on you?"

I firmly believe that souls are here to experience things. If I were to jump in and change a soul's path, I might not be doing them a service. Maybe its something they need to learn about for themselves.

... of course the flipside of that coin is; maybe their soul is here to have the experience of a best friend telling them their floozy is a cheating whore... but I doubt it. Souls learn (remember) best when they come to their own conclusions and their own communication with the body and mind. That rarely happens when someone else affects the mind.

I wouldn't outright tell the bf... it's the old 'shoot the messenger' thing.

I generally feel its none of my business. My thought pattern might change a bit if they were married.

I'd let him know. He'll thank you later when he doesn't catch an STD.

fritzsch wrote: What would GRM do if they saw a friend who had a boyfriend making out with another guy?

Does it have to be a female friend?

Are you sure she is doing more than just making out? Did you only see it once or has it happened multiple times?

Ethical Question Part III:

If you saw her making out with another girl, would you take pictures and post them here?

Woody wrote: Ethical Question Part III: If you saw her making out with another girl, would you take pictures and post them here?

If not, ban!

m4ff3w wrote:

Woody wrote: Ethical Question Part III: If you saw her making out with another girl, would you take pictures and post them here?

If not, ban!

correct answer is take 'em both home w/ ya

fritzsch wrote: Edit: Not sure if it matters but ... I have never personally met the boyfriend

Yep. That matters. Maybe it is someone's place to let him know what is going on, but it is not your's.

Beer Baron wrote: Yep. That matters. Maybe it is someone's place to let him know what is going on, but it is not your's.

Yeah, this is how I am feeling. Good luck to him. :/

You don't know the current condition of their relationship, move along.

if i had a friend whose boyfriend was making out with another guy i'd let her know that he might be gay.

Driven5 wrote: Since it sounds like you're primarily the 'friend' of the cheating-on rather than the cheated-on, why not talk to your friend who is doing the cheating about what she's doing and how you feel about it. If her path in life doesn't coincide with your own moral values, you may want to reconsider your friendship with her. But it is not really your place to rush in and specifically tell her boyfriend, especially not without giving your friend the opportunity to come clean herself first.

+1 for this. If you were friends with the guy more than the girl then yeah I'd tell him, but you said you don't know the BF.

Is she hot?

Also, you don't know the guy, this is where the "moral" part of this gets hazy.

Is she going to be leaving him soon? Its not really cheating then.

But if the dude is a nice guy (you have no way to confirm this btw), then as others have mentioned, might need to reevaluate your friendship. I wouldn't hang around someone like that.

i'd try to negotiate a beejer-for-silence deal, assuming the friend is a hot chick

Giant Purple Snorklewacker wrote: Is she hot?

This is the important question.

It's clear that she's a loose woman. If hot, your trip may be more fun that you originally imagined.

patgizz wrote: if i had a friend whose boyfriend was making out with another guy i'd let her know that he might be gay.

Actually if he has a boyfriend he's already gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Swank Force One wrote: It's clear that she's a loose woman.

That was my first thought too.

If I die before you, I'll save you a good seat in hell.

I wouldn't say anything. If it really bothers you, talk to her about it. You don't know him or their relationship. Who knows, maybe they have some sort of agreement about this sort of thing.

Oh, and heed the advise of Angry and Swank.