I came here for an argument

Because I'm having trouble keeping things straight through the confession thread, I wanted to make a proper pizza thread.

Thin crust is only acceptable when they use lard for the fat. Thick crust aka Sicilian style, it's not pizza, it's bread with cheese and sauce.

Pineapple is ... Acceptable when paired with a salty pork product, bacon, chitlins, ham, etc. Kindly GTFO if you support anchovies though.

Square cuts for square pizza, triangles for round. 

Chicago deep dish, aka drunken lasagna. Knife and fork unless cold.

Speaking of cold pizza, you CANNOT judge a pizza until you've pulled a spice from the fridge at midnight. That's the real deciding factor in good versus bad. I will concede it makes wood fired pizza not as good, but non wood fired better. 

Using similar logic to your argument, thin crust is not pizza it's a cracker with sauce and cheese.

No you didn't.

wawazat said:

Using similar logic to your argument, thin crust is not pizza it's a cracker with sauce and cheese.

I have and will continue to support that opinion. To a degree.

We got pizza last night. Specifically from the thin crust place that uses lard, and a sweeter sauce. 

It is not an everyday pizza, but it is a spectacular thin crust because it does not CRUNCH. Is stable for limited toppings to hold, but doesn't get all crackery like NY style. It's also a rectangle.

A hard crust hurts the teeth, thickness be damned, I won't abide

Pineapple in the first post. Berk this thread, I'm out. 

I'm pretty laissez-faire when it comes to pizza. Except for anchovies. Anchovies on pizza have no place in a civilized society.

In reply to 90BuickCentury :

You are welcome to your opinion, even if it is wrong.  Anchovies are the best on pizza. 

In St. Louis they put this horrible stuff on a cracker called Provel and then try to sell it as pizza.  It not good on a hot pizza and its really bad on a cold pizza.  Then to make things worse all these Italian eateries grab on to it as some sort of St. Louis identity and start putting that horrible "cheese" in everything.

There is so much misinformation here I don't know were to begin. Pizza is supposed to be round, cut into triangles, with a crust thin enough to be folded and eaten on the go. It was made to be portable. Square slices should only come from a Sicilian pie, which is more of a novelty than anything else. While inexplicably popular with some segments of the population, pineapple has no place on a pizza. If you encounter a pizzeria with pineapple slices call your local health department.  

Thank you for coming to my TED talk, I will be taking no questions at this time. 

In reply to AutoOccultist :

Do I know you?  I've been ranting about that for 35 years and I moved away from St Louis 32 years ago. 
 

In reply to Ian F (Forum Supporter) :

We are so far apart on this issue, I think we will just need to agree to disagree. 

RevRico said:

Speaking of cold pizza, you CANNOT judge a pizza until you've pulled a spice from the fridge at midnight. That's the real deciding factor in good versus bad.

If this is a requirement, then it's all bad. 

The only acceptable pizza is homemade. Thin crust is a requirement and should be strong enough to not collapse when lifted full of toppings. Toppings must be thicker than the crust by a factor of 3 and must include meats, veggies, cheeses and anchovies. It must be served hot.

Pineapple should never be served as a food in any form or fashion, much less put on a pizza. It tastes worse than liver, which is also not a food. 

Basically, my wife has to make it. Anything else is not worth the energy to heat it up. 

90BuickCentury said:

In reply to Ian F (Forum Supporter) :

We are so far apart on this issue, I think we will just need to agree to disagree. 

Absolutely.  Far too many fightin' words have been dropped in this thread already.  There are some things that cannot be reconciled.  In Before The Lock!

The only place I can abide pineapple at all is on pizza. 
 

I may be wrong, but I don't care. 
 

#pizzaslut

Can any of you Saint Louisians send me a block of that provell stuff? I've been hearing horror stories the whole time I've been a member here, and well I'm a glutton for punishment. 

About the only thing I'm gonna fight about is that all the fast pizza places (Pizza Hut, Dominoes, Hungry Howies, etc) need more cheese and more sauce.

You don't order your carry out pizzas with extra cheese and extra sauce and you're wrong.

I thought this forum had rules against politics and canoes;)

Ah ha!

Sauce, above or below the cheese?

Pineapple is great.  Pineapple on pizza is better.

Fight me.

Allegedley, Ed Roth used to order a large pizza and tell them not to slice it.

He then rolled it up and ate it like a burrito.

RevRico said:

Ah ha!

Sauce, above or below the cheese?

Prefer below, but above is not a deal killer. However the only local pizza place around here that does sauce above is spectacularly mediocre. 
 

So while we are arguing food will some one please explain to me why when you turn a certain age (12,13,14?) you are all of a sudden not suppose to put ketchup on hot dogs?

If you want to see why there's so many different forms of Pizza in the US- go to Italy.  They "invented" it, and have that many variations.   Well, in terms of crust, layout, slices (or mostly not).  Topping there- well..  more than here.  I've never seen arugula being used on pizza in the US.  And it's awesome.

Pop-Tarts are raviolis.