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Antihero
Antihero GRM+ Memberand Dork
3/2/19 1:13 p.m.

On a sign in town 

" No matter how lazy you are, youll never be as lazy as the guy who named the fireplace"

NermalSnert
NermalSnert Reader
3/2/19 1:15 p.m.

If you want to dance, you have to pay the fiddler.

Knurled.
Knurled. GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/2/19 2:08 p.m.

Dante needs to update The Inferno to include a level for Audi wiring engineers.

Knurled.
Knurled. GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/2/19 2:10 p.m.
NermalSnert said:

If you want to dance, you have to pay the fiddler.

You also have to leave your friends behind.

Wally
Wally GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/2/19 2:10 p.m.

“I have an eight inch tongue and can breathe through my ears” -The best pick up line I’d ever heard.  

AngryCorvair
AngryCorvair GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/2/19 2:32 p.m.
Wally said:

“I have an eight inch tongue and can breathe through my ears” -The best pick up line I’d ever heard.  

I assume you accepted?

Toebra
Toebra Dork
3/2/19 2:32 p.m.

My former father in law, complaining about a flat tire on his RX3 coupe.

 

Me: It's only flat on one side

 

Made him laugh

Wally
Wally GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/2/19 5:18 p.m.

In reply to AngryCorvair :

I was just a witness, but the young woman it was directed at did. 

Wally
Wally GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/2/19 5:20 p.m.

“It’s the party popper of the developing world”-  Richard Hammond on the AK 47.

Toyman01
Toyman01 MegaDork
3/2/19 5:34 p.m.

"If you’re fat but you identify as skinny...does that make you a transfat." Someone on the Book of Faces. 

Ransom
Ransom GRM+ Memberand PowerDork
3/2/19 6:00 p.m.

"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But in practice, there is."

-computer scientist and failed murderer Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut.

I think it's one of the best quotes ever and nicely captures an incredibly useful point, but the asshat it came from should be struck from the record, or at least not celebrated. I almost didn't attribute it, but settled for denoting the asshattery (or mental disease or what the berk ever). At least he failed to do his family in but got himself.

TRoglodyte
TRoglodyte UltraDork
3/2/19 6:03 p.m.

i work with automated machinery that has limit switches, my coworker asked me for an "auxiliary elastic limit switch repair kit". I handed him a rubber band.

wheelsmithy
wheelsmithy GRM+ Memberand SuperDork
3/2/19 6:18 p.m.

My Old Man:

"If you're going to wish for a loaf of bread, why not wish for a Grocery Store?"

"If you were in the middle of the road, and a truck was coming at you, would you pray to God, or get out of the way" (maybe paraphrase)

"No good deed goes unpunished"

"Promoted to the full level of his incompetence" (Stolen from the Air Force, as well, they may all have been.)

 

Toyman01
Toyman01 MegaDork
3/3/19 1:51 p.m.

"Nothing is as much fun as welding a jungle gym while climbing through it," Toyman01 about welding a cage in a race car. 

RevRico
RevRico PowerDork
3/3/19 1:56 p.m.

Ya plant corn, ya get corn.

My dad's words of wisdom on fatherhood. berkeley I miss him.

Appleseed
Appleseed MegaDork
3/3/19 4:25 p.m.

Me: "Hey, look at that. It's only $XX. That's a good deal."

The Old Man: " Do you have $XX?"

Me: "No"

The Old Man: "Then it ain't a good deal."

 

NermalSnert
NermalSnert Reader
3/3/19 4:31 p.m.

"The more people I piss off, the less I've got to worry about knocking on my door" - An old friend back in the day.

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
3/3/19 5:14 p.m.

The pecan pie looks like E36 M3. I think I’ll have that.

Appleseed
Appleseed MegaDork
3/3/19 5:15 p.m.

Pizza is like sex. Even when it's bad, it's still pizza.

Mndsm
Mndsm MegaDork
3/3/19 7:12 p.m.

"Mad how the object of golf is to play as little golf as possible " 

 

And "crazy how the brain named itself" paraphrased from reddit. 

Appleseed
Appleseed MegaDork
3/3/19 7:32 p.m.

Imagine an object that is expensive to own and maintain.

Appleseed: "That will make airplanes look cheap"

Mndsm
Mndsm MegaDork
3/3/19 7:44 p.m.

Everything I know about the Kardashians I learned against my will. 

Keith Tanner
Keith Tanner GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/3/19 8:07 p.m.
RevRico said:

Ya plant corn, ya get corn.

My dad's words of wisdom on fatherhood. berkeley I miss him.

"You pay peanuts, you get monkeys". I think the boss is coming around on this.

"You need the kind of hammer where when you hit something, it stays hit" - Me on (I think) popping a ball joint about 18 years ago.

wvumtnbkr
wvumtnbkr GRM+ Memberand UberDork
3/3/19 8:23 p.m.

Never confuse knowledge with intelligence.    -me.

 

That's what. - She

 

 

Keith Tanner
Keith Tanner GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
3/3/19 8:25 p.m.
wvumtnbkr said:

Never confuse knowledge with intelligence.    -me.

That one works both ways.

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