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poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 8:57 a.m.

After struggling with alcohol addiction...and his good pals crippling depression/anxiety for years, I decided on Friday to "check myself in" for 30 days.

There's such a wealth of wisdom here, I figured I'd ask if y'all have any advice.

Thots & Slayers also appreciated.

I need to get back to the badass motherberkeleyer I used to be, and it's become obvious I can't do it on my own.

Need to re-focus on being "Best Daddy Evar," and set a good example for my baby girls.

Love yall. Wish me luck!

Props. It takes a big person to admit the problem is there.

Thots&Slayers. Music is your friend.

11GTCS
11GTCS HalfDork
11/14/20 9:04 a.m.

Good luck sir. I have no advise to offer other than your wanting to make a change should get you results if you put the work and time in.  In for thots and slayers.  

Stampie (FS)
Stampie (FS) GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
11/14/20 9:12 a.m.

I'm here for you.  Might I suggest talking with Dusterdb13?  I can get you two in touch if you need.

 

kazoospec
kazoospec UberDork
11/14/20 9:24 a.m.

No personal experience, but I've vicariously seen hundreds, maybe thousands of people work through the process in criminal and child protection cases.  TO ME, as an outsider, it seems there are a couple common threads for those who succeed (at least in the short term, obviously we don't usually follow clients for years):

Work on mind, body and spirit.  Neglect one of the three and that will be the one that trips you up.  If you have spiritual beliefs reconnect with them, if you don't, take the time to explore them.  Strengthen your body physically.  This  is both a substitution for addiction, and a coping mechanism for some of the symptoms of withdrawal.  Figure out a way to keep your mind active.  You may need to open up something completely new in order to let your mind work in areas that don't have addiction triggers.

Be prepared to give up EVERYTHING except for your family.  Sadly, successful recovery often requires that you leave behind friends and activities that are too intricately woven into the fabric of addition.  You probably already know the what/who, but if not, any competent recovery program should be able to help you identify them.  Hopefully, that doesn't include us here, and your motorsports activities in general, but if it does . . . so be it.  

Understand that, in the short term, the depression/anxiety will get worse.  At this point, you sort of have to go on faith that it will get better on the back side of recovery.  It will.  

You'll be in my prayers.  Not just generally.  My prayer for you will be that God gives you the wisdom to chose the right path and the strength to walk it.  

Every successfully recovered addict I've ever spoken to has said it's the hardest, most rewarding thing they've ever done. 

Mndsm
Mndsm MegaDork
11/14/20 9:29 a.m.

Having walked the path with many people (and am actually in the midst of a friend's divorce because of said addictions) I can empathize. Lemme know if you need to holler. 

thedoc
thedoc Reader
11/14/20 9:34 a.m.

Love your attitude!  Good on you for taking on this before it was a larger problem, good on you for taking this on for your girls.  Get back to the person God meant you to be!  Go for it!

 

nutherjrfan
nutherjrfan UberDork
11/14/20 9:45 a.m.

I liked a post by Mark Jennison on FB.

He has a tough love approach.

I just sort of faded out of drinking.

My politics don't fit this town and I've watched at least two men die. 

Plus Bud got too damn expensive and I knew how to throw them back and tip like a fool.

But give the Jennison guy a look see.

It might be good.

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 9:55 a.m.

In reply to kazoospec :

Based on the increase in fluid draining from my eyes, I'm allergic to this post. Thank you SO much. This really spoke to me.
 

I think I'm ready. I wanna FIGHT this E36 M3 and kick its ass to the curb.

 

Y'all are too awesome.

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 9:58 a.m.

PS: #BLESSINGS: My middle brother quit drinking 20 years ago. My oldest brother went to rehab ~18 months ago and is 18 months sober. Between them and my friends, I've got a REALLY solid squad.

Genuinely looking forward to attending AA meetings with my bro as soon as I'm done with in-patient.

I don't wanna live like this anymore.

John Welsh (Moderate Supporter)
John Welsh (Moderate Supporter) Mod Squad
11/14/20 10:00 a.m.

In reply to poopshovel again :

I just want you to know, that the desire to be in your presence is a big reason that I drive 1000 miles to Gainesville in Octobers.

You are someone who's presence I genuinely enjoy to be in.  Furthermore, I continue to enjoy that presence here online. 

I guess I'll summarize that with... Love ya man! 

yupididit
yupididit GRM+ Memberand PowerDork
11/14/20 10:03 a.m.

In reply to poopshovel again :

Rooting for you! 

Dusterbd13-michael (Forum Supporter)
Dusterbd13-michael (Forum Supporter) MegaDork
11/14/20 10:04 a.m.

Call me. 828-260-1254. Been where you are.....

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 10:11 a.m.
Dusterbd13-michael (Forum Supporter) said:

Call me. 828-260-1254. Been where you are.....

Thank you <insert praying hands emoji>
Will do! It's a 706 number.

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 10:12 a.m.

In reply to John Welsh (Moderate Supporter) :

Love you too, my dog. Right now, the idea of being sober at the Challenge is terrifying, but I've got a year to get well! <3

John Welsh (Moderate Supporter)
John Welsh (Moderate Supporter) Mod Squad
11/14/20 10:13 a.m.

In reply to poopshovel again :

On this journey, you're gonna meet people where you say to yourself, "yeah, but that person doesn't really get me or understand me, my problems are not like his problems, etc." 

I feel with Michael-disturbed, your not going to feel that way. My outside observation is that he's "your type of person."  I certainly know he's a good guy to know.!

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 10:18 a.m.

Y'all are too damned much. Literally FEELING the support.

MrJoshua
MrJoshua UltimaDork
11/14/20 10:19 a.m.
poopshovel again said:

PS: #BLESSINGS: My middle brother quit drinking 20 years ago. My oldest brother went to rehab ~18 months ago and is 18 months sober. Between them and my friends, I've got a REALLY solid squad.

Genuinely looking forward to attending AA meetings with my bro as soon as I'm done with in-patient.

I don't wanna live like this anymore.

That's awesome. Big hugs your way man.

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 10:21 a.m.

In reply to John Welsh (Moderate Supporter) :

We talkin. That is, indeed, the case. Thank you.

poopshovel again
poopshovel again MegaDork
11/14/20 10:23 a.m.

In reply to MrJoshua :

Thanks dude!

wawazat
wawazat Dork
11/14/20 10:34 a.m.

My thoughts are with you man.  You understand that you need to change and the reasons for the change.  That's a huge step in the right direction and you should feel proud of your self for understanding it and taking action on it.  

pinchvalve (Forum Supporter)
pinchvalve (Forum Supporter) MegaDork
11/14/20 10:35 a.m.

My wife's brother just went to rehab for the same thing. He traveled from PA to FL for the center, and the first thought that I had was "as soon as he gets back home, it will all be forgotten." My point is that he will do well in rehab because he is away from his routines, his influences, and his stresses. But as soon as he returns to the environment that has supported his addiction, he will fall right back into his old ways. 

I think that an important part of changing habits is changing environments. I am pushing for him to stay in FL for a while, or move closer to a big city and get a job, or go out west...something! Get a fresh start, get away from the people and things that you are used to and you associate with being a drunk. (He lives in a small town, inhabited by drug addicts. He is proud of the fact that he didn't get addicted to herion, despite being a complete alcoholic)  I think if he just comes back and steps into his old life, he will relapse yet again. He has a seasonal, unskilled job that he could get anywhere. His boss is an enabler. His apartment is paid for by his father, so all his money goes to booze. His father is an enabler.  His mother was a drunk and an enabler. He needs to get away, stand on his own, and let the rehab become permanent. 

I truly hope rehab works for him. I hope he gets to be a father to his daughter. I hope he isn't dead early, like his mother who made it to 58. But without other changes, I am not holding my breath. 

dyintorace (Forum Supporter)
dyintorace (Forum Supporter) GRM+ Memberand PowerDork
11/14/20 10:38 a.m.

Good for you for making a tough decision! What a great thing for you, your wife and your girls. You'll alter their trajectory in a very positive way by doing this. Rooting hard for you and will be thinking about you!

Duke
Duke MegaDork
11/14/20 10:52 a.m.

You've pushed a tough button to push instead of continuing to let it slide.  That is half the battle.  When the other half of the battle gets tough, and it will, remember you had the strength to push that button, and that strength is still inside you.

Best of luck, man.  Keep in touch.

 

californiamilleghia
californiamilleghia SuperDork
11/14/20 10:59 a.m.

We are proud of ya buddy......

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