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tb
tb HalfDork
11/24/14 5:50 a.m.

I'm looking for some outside opinions here just in case I am being unreasonable or something...

Hypothetical situation: You are casually shopping around for another vehicle that is well suited to your growing family. Currently own a project e30 but have baby number 1 arriving in a few months. We don't drive a lot but extenuating circumstances say that a larger and more modern car could be nice.

So just recently my mother in law says that she will give us her car and it will make them happy and avoid conflicting family E36 M3. Sadly, it is the definition of soulless appliance, something that SWMBO and I would never, ever consider buying for ourselves. It is just plain not our style and has almost no redeeming qualities to a household of car enthusiasts; just basic transportation in its definitive form.

The tough part though, it is a great car. A mint, low mileage six year old cream puff that would be highly desirable to the general population. One of the most popular and best sellers of all time; probably worth twice what we were looking to spend on a used second car. There is not a single thing wrong with it, except everything is wrong with it...

Should I pass, causing family strife and more work for everyone involved? We prefer power and luxury over economy and value, but does that really matter right now? Can I live with a car that I think is barely ok and SWMBO resents most of the time? Will I learn to love being one of the masses in an regular car that most people would love to have? It is safer, more reliable, larger and free; that ticks off a lot of the right boxes... but will I have to hand in my card if I settle for an appliance? Should I just stop whining and put my energy into more pressing matters for now?

Thanks in advance to the all knowing hive.

gunner
gunner GRM+ Memberand Reader
11/24/14 6:03 a.m.

If your MIL truly cares about you, a simple no thank you will suffice everyone else's opinion can go burn.

tb
tb HalfDork
11/24/14 6:14 a.m.

In reply to gunner:

Sadly, I am not sure that this is the case. She likes me but is used to being the stereotypical overbearing, manipulative, know it all that insists on treating my wife likes she is still a child.

Thanks for the input; I appreciate it.

KyAllroad
KyAllroad HalfDork
11/24/14 6:15 a.m.

Take the car. Embrace the joy of FREE for a couple of years while you put away cash for a car you want more. After an appropriate amount of time makes noises about trading in the car for something even safer for your new child. You're ahead of the curve, MIL is happy, problem solved.

edizzle89
edizzle89 Reader
11/24/14 6:19 a.m.

as i see it, a free DD saves you a lot of money for other things. if its strictly just a DD then i dont see a problem with any car that is safe, reliable, and fits your needs. just keep something fun on the side

icaneat50eggs
icaneat50eggs HalfDork
11/24/14 6:22 a.m.

Soulless appliances have there uses. One of which is to save you money so you can have a better you in a few years. Also, as long as you have said appliance it really opens up the door for other types of cars. I daily drive a grandma buick, I can fit my kids in it when needed, it's been reliable as an anvil, and because it keeps going and u don't have to buy a new car I have worked a nice driver miata and an e36 chumpcar into the budget

JohnRW1621
JohnRW1621 UltimaDork
11/24/14 6:23 a.m.

Consider all the dollars freed up for the project E30.
Take the car. Embrace its "appliance-ness" for what it needs to accomplish; family movement. Meanwhile, find the joy of driving in a more dedicated "fun-car".

Edit: Upon hitting "add post" I see that four of use were giving you the same answer, simultaneously.

DeadSkunk
DeadSkunk SuperDork
11/24/14 6:37 a.m.

I can't think of any free car I would refuse to drive. If you view it as just a useful tool then it ought to work.

ebonyandivory
ebonyandivory SuperDork
11/24/14 6:41 a.m.

Can't anything be made to be less soul-sucking? (Especially newish, free ones)

Better tires, poly bushings, better anti-sways?

Think of it as a challenge!

chandlerGTi
chandlerGTi SuperDork
11/24/14 6:41 a.m.

Wow, I'm with deadskunk on this one.

ultraclyde
ultraclyde SuperDork
11/24/14 6:43 a.m.

Don't think of it as a free boring car, think of it as a free ticket to have awesome if less than reliable toys.

Appliances for dd have real advantages.

tb
tb HalfDork
11/24/14 6:55 a.m.

You guys have some good points here, I appreciate it. I am pretty much ok with compromising in order to make the right choice for our family. The tougher issue is convincing the wife to put on her big girl panties and fall in line. She will do whatever I say in this issue but I prefer to build a consensus versus unilateral commands.

FWIW, the money issue is a wash. We have plenty enough for whatever we want in life but we tend to be frugal and conservative with expenditures. It will wind up costing something to personalize and upgrade almost any car with tinted windows, excellent rolling stock, a little more power, etc. We would not really be spending or saving enough either way to make a difference to our finances.

It just stings a little to be in this position where the right choice is not the fun choice... I try to keep cars the one area of my life where I do not let logic interfere with emotion!

Fr3AkAzOiD
Fr3AkAzOiD Reader
11/24/14 6:59 a.m.

Take car, drive for a year, pretend something major broke/is about to break, sell and get what you want with a happy mil and more $$$ in your pocket.

trucke
trucke HalfDork
11/24/14 7:01 a.m.

Take the free car. All the points presented are valid. When the little one comes, you will have waaaay more expenses than you planned. Newer and reliable is the better option when you have a baby.

tb
tb HalfDork
11/24/14 7:03 a.m.
Fr3AkAzOiD wrote: Take car, drive for a year, pretend something major broke/is about to break, sell and get what you want with a happy mil and more $$$ in your pocket.

As an example of just how cool about cars MY mother is, she gave almost that exact advice! I could easily pull it off in even less than a years time but am too honest of a guy to go there...

My Mama accepted a very boring old man car from her father when circumstances dictated that it was the proper decision and eventually gifted it on to my brother. We are a bit better off financially than the rest of my family but that is not excuse to forget where we came from and the lessons that it taught us...

bigev007
bigev007 Reader
11/24/14 7:09 a.m.

Just make sure that whatever you sell/trade it for down the road you never EVER mention a single breakdown, maintenance repair, need for new tires, washer fluid fill, ANYTHING that ever needs to be done to it.

Cause that's how you get 'you traded my perfectly good car for that piece of junk'. And nobody wants that.

Don't forget that in a couple of months, the two (3) of you get a lot more leverage. :)

pushrod36
pushrod36 Reader
11/24/14 7:10 a.m.

I wouldn't take it, but it's because my FIL is a manipulative man. In a couple years I would hear about how I wasn't excited/grateful/thankful/happy enough when I recieved said car. My wife and I agree that we won't even spend the night at his house anymore to avoid this type of discussion.

As long as that was not the case I would take the car and be happy to avoid the expense.

DeadSkunk
DeadSkunk SuperDork
11/24/14 7:11 a.m.

Just what soulless appliance vehicle are we talking about here, anyway?

Lof8
Lof8 GRM+ Memberand Reader
11/24/14 7:14 a.m.

What is the car in question? I can picture having fun in any vehicle that was free!

tb
tb HalfDork
11/24/14 7:21 a.m.

They are not so manipulative that we cannot stand them at all. Picture off the boat immigrants that come from a culture where elders are not questioned and family decisions are all made by the reigning patriarch.

Soulless appliance in question is an '08 Civic, not sure what trim but it is a sedan and not an si... A perfectly fine (excellent?) vehicle but to us it screams cheap and boring. We are not Honda people and not really looking to own a penalty box. I have driven it a few times without remarkable comment to make and I understand that they are highly regarded by many segments of the population. We rent dozens of cars a year and can deal with anything when need be but I hate to let logic into my world of fantasy and passion.

Sky_Render
Sky_Render Dork
11/24/14 7:38 a.m.

Driving a soulless appliance as a DD makes you appreciate your "fun" cars even more.

gearheadE30
gearheadE30 New Reader
11/24/14 7:40 a.m.

You could do worse than a civic. They have a decent aftermarket that could help with the boring aspect a little, and I'd think avoiding dealing with the family issues would make driving an appliance okay, at least for a short time. Consider it like an investment. Keep it for a year, sell it, make $$$, under pretense of some reasonable-sounding excuse.

HappyAndy
HappyAndy UltraDork
11/24/14 7:44 a.m.

Take the soulless appliance and enjoy its payment freeness for a couple of years while you save up for something that you actually like. When you're done with it, pay it forward by giving it to someone else that could benefit from it.

When I was done with my Datsun pickup, my BIL wanted it. I let him have it for the cost of getting plates on my next car. When my wife was done with her 1st Gen exploder, we gave it to friend of the family in exchange for a full tank of premium fuel in her car. Everyone was happy in both of those deals.

tb
tb HalfDork
11/24/14 7:46 a.m.

In reply to gearheadE30:

Oh, I am aware that it is a perfectly acceptable car. I need reminders that many would love to have my "problems".

Aftermarket mods will have to be kept to a minimum but I will be seeking advice here if needed; I know very little of these cars. Mostly, I do not want to sink money into anything that I do not love and I want to avoid any mods that would hurt resale in the future.

I came into performance cars in the fast and furious age where people thought there $5k in mods to make a 17 second civic put them in a mad tyte fast car, yo! Gonna have to strip myself of those prejudices and just enjoy the doubling of my mpgs on regular 87 octane!

Oh, how the mighty have fallen...

pinchvalve
pinchvalve GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
11/24/14 7:48 a.m.

Life Before Baby


Life After Baby

You will be happy not to have a big car payment and you will not really care what you are driving for a few years as long as it is safe for baby.

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