Oh, boy... now what?

Tommy just passed his driver's test and is now a fully licensed driver. I don't know exactly what to think about that... I'm happy for him, scared, and feeling just a little obsolete. It's a lot like his first day of school, but on steroids!

Margie

Thanx for the warning. I'll avoid all Florida streets for a couple of years until he learns he's not invincible.

As someone who's been there, I can't help.

You've worked him for 16 years teaching him right from wrong, please and thank you, how to be a gracious loser etc. He knows what to do and what NOT to do in a car. Obviously six passengers and a 12er of Basic Beer is out, right?

When Ian got his I made a deal. No more than you and one other person in the car. Ever. If you're in over your head, friends are partying, driving too fast, showing off, whatever, you're not comfotable? Call me.

No questions asked. I'll pick you up, clean you off, put you to bed, I WILL NOT ask questions.

That's the deal, you call, no questions. When he left the house he always said I love you, I always asked "Got your quarter?"

I've never had to use it, but I explained that rolling out of bed a 3:00am and fetching a kid is wicked less drama than a wake and funeral. He understood.

Thank you God!

He'll be fine. 10 years from now when someone says "You done a good job with that boy." you will understand.

Smile Mom.

Track time!!!! Give him a fast car that is not street legal, and a minivan for around town.

carguy123 wrote: Thanx for the warning. I'll avoid all Florida streets for a couple of years until he learns he's not invincible.

Considering all the concrete in the Suddard's backyard, Tommy knows he's not invincible.

But with Margie and Tim as parents, he has the best influences - as long as they can keep him off the boards.

914- With that message, you have earned my true respect. Well said, well done.

A old Plymouth Voyager minivan was my first car. It was great at keeping me out of trouble for the most part. Just make sure he's not too much of a hit with the ladies if you go that route.

Obviously I only know Marjorie and Tim from the mag and the forum over the years, but I can't imagine two better instructors. I'm sure he'll be fine.

Just cause I know he's going to see this: Congrats Tommy!

P.S. We'll be scanning the police blotter for your name. Just kidding. Sort of.

pinchvalve wrote: Track time!!!! Give him a fast car that is not street legal, and a minivan for around town.

YES+a bazillion

my first car was a

I am still alive because of it. My friends in the goats and the 'ludes and the novas arent around anymore.

I am grateful on a daily basis for my parents, as I know they are me. Its a pretty great relationship when you really boil it down.

cwh wrote: 914- With that message, you have earned my true respect. Well said, well done.

The outcome, a 25 y/o that pays his own bills, better credit rating than me, engaged to a psychytrist, loves cars, life and is a people person. Thanks much to Mom, I taught him wrenching.

When I was where Margie is today, I said pretty much the same thing. Where Per is: I've said it before, it's a very fast ride.

But thank you.

Thanks for the words of encouragement, guys, and Dan, I think I'll just print your deal with Ian and give it to Tommy. Couldn't've said it better.

Margie

It's more than a quarter, but...

a friend passed along his nice older car to a nephew. Included in the deal was a $100 bill in the glove compartment. The deal was, the money was for cab fare in circumstances where driving was not advisable, and it would be replaced, no questions asked, if it was ever used.

Made sense to me.

Marjorie Suddard wrote: Tommy just passed his driver's test and is now a fully licensed driver. I don't know exactly what to think about that... I'm happy for him, scared, and feeling just a little obsolete. It's a lot like his first day of school, but on steroids! Margie

I did not seem real to us until the first time Cameron drove away and Paula was standing beside me.

About a week later, I am driving down route 83, and he rolls by about 25 mph faster than me right on the bumper of the guy in front of him. Needless to say, he got a tune up when we both got home. I have seen him out on the roads 3-4 times since. He doing much better now. Good thing, as he was involved in a near head on that was completely the other persons fault. Just before he left, I told him to take it slow because visibility was poor. He was okay, car totalled. I never felt so bad about what I put my parents through as that moment when I got the call. Cam cruises a stock Cavalier. He has been good about his speed. My poor parents got to listen to my V8 Stude and V8 Nova with loud duals for miles as I drove the road near home. Today we have 2 driving.

I had a similar deal with my eldest. Any time any where, you get a free ride as long as you aren't calling from jail. If you're calling from jail, don't call till morning and enjoy your stay. Insurance was on me until he made it go up then it was his problem. Worked out pretty well. He bent up some sheet metal (paying more attention to GF than road), but no one got hurt. I count that as a blessing. At this point you have done what you can. It is all on him now to make the decisions.

Seems like a smart kid, so I wouldn't worry too much.

Considering that Tommy has been Karting quite a lot, has his own E30 project car and that he has been posting here with much more maturity than one would think of someone his age, I think Mom and Dad did just fine with him.

If more kids and parents were as cool as the 914's, Suddards, etc the world would be a better place.

my parents gave me the "no questions asked pick up" deal as well. I never took advantage of it, though I never really had a reason to. Hopefully the same will be true of your children.

I am sure I will ask the same advice when I have a child of drivint age as well. I've met Tommy, and Margie, you have done good with that one. He will be fine.

I agree in full, I have been able to chat to Tommy a few times and he is a very respectful, intelligent and impressive young man.

congarts to tommy, better luck with your cars then mine. i blew up 3 or 4 of my parnest cars. 3 motors and one i totaled out, and one clutch pedal i broke, still not sure how i did that one, but driveing at 10pm to my grandmothers house from walkegan in first gear allk the way if fun and it was one of the best ways to say i could not attand high school the next day since i was out of the state.

I'm surprised about all of this "I survived because I drove a minivan" deal and what not. From what I've read and heard of Tommy, he sounds like the kind of kid who won't be one of the statistics that wraps his first car around something. In fact, I'm amazed when people tell me this, as I don't think I've ever been that out of control on the street (even when I was 16) and I've had some pretty fun cars and driven like a d-bag my fair share!

My parents never gave me the "no questions asked pick up" speech. For me it was you better be home by X time or my dad would take an axe to my car. I had both a 400hp Camaro and a 944 Porsche (at the same time) in high school and lived to tell the tale.

I do remember getting a call one night an hour after I was suppose to be home from my dad. He said if I wasn't home in 8 minutes (end of the hour) both my cars would be dead. I was at my girlfriends place on the other side of town a good 15 minutes away following the speed limit. I made it home with about 30 seconds to spare and a cracked exhaust from jumping the car on the way home.

I thought Tommy was already driving on the road.

I drove like an idiot for a long time, and lost my license alot. But that worked out for the best. It taught me to be patient, for one. And not driving for three years, I didn't go and screw up my credit on a new car, and me credit is still very good because of it. And it led me to be friends with a guy who got me into real estate appraisal, which when the market started to tank, I got a job at a pizza place and that's where I met my wife. All because I drove like a jerk!

I'm sure everything will go down alot better for Tommy.

Joey

In the line of work I'm in (insurance adjuster) I get to see the aftermath of a lot of youthful stupidity. Like the Mustang covertible that wound up in someone's living room. Upside down. And it was a V6, because the dad thought his son shouldn't have a V8. Good father, smart kid, and yet he felt the need to do 60 in a 35 zone on the way to school one morning. Luckily, he survived with hardly a scratch.

OTOH, this week's special is a 25 year old who just bought the car of his dreams, a WRX with some nice mods on it. He hit a tree at over 100. We haven't been able to locate the instrument cluster. The ring gear was lying separate from the multiple pieces of engine block on the top of the debris pile at the tow yard. The passenger survived nicely, because he wore his belt. The driver is no longer with us, as he chose not to wear his.

Myself, I'm lucky to be here. I pulled some stupid stunts in my teen years as did many of my friends. The car didn't really matter; we found a way to make unsafe passes, slide cars on gravel roads lined by trees, etc. This was my way of finding the limits of what a vehicle or I could do. Tommy is worlds ahead in that he's had good training and hopefully won't feel the need to 'experiment' off the track. Those that say performance driver training isn't good for young drivers are morons. It would have helped me immensely.

For Tommy, two bits of advice. Seat belt ALWAYS. And, pay attention. Constantly. The best car for a beginner has no radio, no iPod, no cell phone...no distractions of any kind. Virtually every accident a driver causes has it's roots in inattentiveness, if even for a second or two.

For Mamma Marjorie, I can only say you've done the best you can do, and you've done far more than most. The odds are in your favor as a result.

With a license comes a car. Think hard about what sort of car you get him, or let him get.

I know myself, and what sort of kid I was. Like D, I'm lucky to be here as well, for all the same reasons. That's why of my son were 16 today, he'd have a 700 series Volvo. That way when he crashes, he might survive it. I don't want my boy starting off in a tin can.

I have to disagree with a few Ideas.

Minivan is a bad idea, teens have a need to show off, that is a given. The more people in the car the greater the need to show off. That said I do miss the aerostar we had when I was in HS.

Too slow of a car is also bad. I know the when I am driving an underpowered car (my E30 eta automatic qualifies) I end up driving faster. I end up starting to use racing lines to keep up momentum and have the throttle matted far too much of the time.

Kids can survive having a somewhat fast car, provided that they have a healthy fear of it.

personally, I would make the rule no passengers unless a family member is along. It sucks for tommy, but has a strong risky behavior possibility reduction.

I thought Tommy already had an E30 though?

I am going to use the "no questions asked pick up" with my kids, they are 6 and 2 so I have some time.

I remember all of the stupid things I did in a car in High School. The week I graduated I rolled my parents 83 SAAB 900S, three of us were in the car and no one was hurt, seatbelts all the way around. My kids will be going to one of those car control classes for sure.

Tommy: Don't fall for the "No questions asked thing." It's a ruse! They just want you to self-incriminate!