Little things that piss me off...

Now you need to reply with "What are the odds! I have a brand new starter from the same year sitting on the shelf!"

Looked at a 928 that the ad said ran great but had a noisy torque tube and the paint was hazy. Interior was supposed to be great and it was said to drive really well. Reality was slightly different. Paint was crap, interior was crap, body wasn't straight, and it wouldn't start because it was out of gas. They just stared at me after telling me this. I had to tell them to go to the gas station 1 block away and get some gas for it and they acted surprised that I wanted to see it run. Still doesn't start with gas until they jumper the fuel pump. Then the trans is slipping, the wheels wobbled so much I started to wonder if all the lug nuts were attached, and when it does find a gear it has noooo acceleration. They were then surprised when I didn't even bother making an offer. Several months later the ad is still being reposted on craiglist but now includes something about no title, but you dont really need one because it was a Georgia car.

so... if there's one thing we can learn from these experiences, it's when the seller says the car doesn't run, we should casually inquire "why?" but don't say anything else... like the idea that you can bring a battery with you... since I'm sure most of us have at least one extra old battery hanging around the garage...

When I sold my van on ebay, I advertised it as "non-running; hasn't been run in over a year"... when I talked to the winning bidder, I told him to bring a battery... "it might start..." He did and it did... and went home very happy. I guess I'm just too honest... although I didn't relish the thought of helping him push the van onto the trailer he brought...

I hate when people outright lie in ads. I see tons of 944's advertised with tilt steering, CD changers, things like that. I once found a S2, that was an 8v car with an auto. One angry email to the lister, no response but the ad went away.

My favorite: "you'll need to smog it." Translation: it won't pass, and the seller knows it. And yes, providing proof of a clean emissions test is the seller's responsibility here in California.

Giant Purple Snorklewacker wrote: I need to remember to bring another person with me who is coached to say "This car is a piece of E36 M3. You do not want this car" over and over and over.

this is my favorite strategery, although most of the time the byuddy is constantly going OMFG GET THIS POS ITS TERRIBLE. I need to brief my friends on how to handle these things.

I'm a big fan of "(insert southern state here) car, never seen snow" ...... while it's parked on top of a big f'ing snow bank in the middle of Massachusetts.

I really hate when you post a car that's listed as for "parts only, needs transmission to drive" and people ask if it's reliable.

When I sold my Sable daily driver, I had all sorts of morons come look at it.

Apparently asking below book value ($1400) on a car means all the idiots come out of the woodwork. Car was starting to rust, had a TON of hail damage, cracked windshield, but ran and drove and everything worked great.

First guy comes looking at it. Test drives it, drives the HELL out of it. Wide open throttle to 100+ on country roads. I had to ask him to knock it off, it wasnt a race car, nor plated, nor insured. Brings it back, goes over it with a fine toothed comb (I berkeleyed up by giving him a flashlight, shoulda told him tough crap). Tries to get me down to $1100 due to the things he found (bald tires, broken swaybar endlink, oil leak). I tell him the for $1100 I will keep it, for $1200, its his. He keeps going "Aw man, you wont takes eleven hunnderd fo it" "No, I will take $1200 for it, bottom dollar" He keeps going on and on. I snatch the keys back out of the ignition, lock the car, and head back inside with him still bitchin. He sits in his car with his wife and kid for half an hour in the driveway, then leaves. Never heard back from him.

Second potential buyer, two women come. They ask nothing about the car. Drive it, test the stereo and the A/C, and say "Sure, we'll take it." Easy sale, right? Except they brought a money order that looked like it had been printed on an injet printer at home. I said, "The ad said cash, I can't take that." One goes to the other," Ah tolds you we shoulda brought cash! Ah droves all the way out here fo this?" I tell them there is a check cashing place in town 15 miles away, or if they like, give me $100 cash to hold the car for a week and come back sometime with the balance, in cash. They pack up and leave. I dont know if this was a scam or stupidity. Probably both.

By this time I had posted an ad up to CL that was at a lower price, $1200 CASH FIRM in bold letters. Another guy and his wife come. Test drive the car, look it over, and say they will take it. They gave me $1350 cash money, since they had seen my price in my 2nd ad not my 3rd ad. Car was sold, I was happy. I hate selling cars.

I hear you Turbo. The only thing worse is selling a car to a friend that is not a car person. I sold the car because I didnt want to work on it any more, now every time it has a problem they call me and want me to diagnose and repair it for free. There is no berklying warranty. You dont want to pay for repairs buy a new car not a $1000.00 car.

Just looked at a 'good running, fair interrior, ok bodied' Fiat 2000, guy lets me take it with my buddy, we drive it and let it idle up to temp, and then some, I shut it down, wait 10 minutes, drive back, he asks what took so long, I said the fan didn't kick on and it was getting damn hot, needless to say, I saved his engine, but it made me sad, I was just about to offer him before that crap happened...