Armadillos

JG must wear helmet-cam for armadillo encounter! i predict hilarity.

The only armadillo I have ever personally encountered was on a buffet table at a fancy restaurant in Grenada.

That said, I have lots of experience with pesky nutria and raccoons.

Hav-a-heart traps are the bomb.

minimac wrote: If you chase them, don't follow them across the street. They rank right up there with opossums in street crossing ability.

PROTIP: If you're ever lost in the woods, you can simply follow an armadillo to the nearest highway.
Second PROTIP: They explode when shot with a .30-30.

why do I think you have experience with exploding Armadillos?

mad_machine wrote: why do I think you have experience with exploding Armadillos?

Back home we noticed a very ill armadillo out in during the day. Not a good sign.

Per Schroeder wrote: Word to the wise...Armadillos jump straight up when threatened....don't stand over them.

Yup, I remember shooting one with a BB gun when I was like 10 years old. Thing jumped up like 5 feet in the air. I believe I pissed my pants laughing.

Apparently the armadillos aren't content with digging up my yard, but they're apparently stealing my WiFi and monitoring this board as well. They didn't even show today.

Work gloves and pet carrier are on the back porch, and helmet cam has fresh batteries.

jg

JG Pasterjak wrote: ... retard strength ...

I loled

glad I have no 'dillos around me, but i have 'possum and racoons. I had a point blank shot on a HUGE possum, didn't take it, i was out for the bever that was damning up the over flow of my pond.

I dunno about catching the armadillo, but if you keep petting that thing, you're probably going to end up catching something gross, like the herps. And then you'll have to go all Chris Brown on the armadillo and punch it in the face.

Margie

Marjorie Suddard wrote: I dunno about catching the armadillo, but if you keep petting that thing, you're probably going to end up catching something gross, like the herps. And then you'll have to go all Chris Brown on the armadillo and punch it in the face. Margie

Rappers who bite there girlfriends are hilarious!

Joey

Chris Brown said: Yeah, I'm hittin that

2 pages and still no Jimmy Buffet references? Y'all are paragons of self-restraint!

Having said that, the Hav-a heart cages work really well for varmits such as this. Take it/them to the edge of a swamp, trip it open, and watch the varmit shoot out of it like a cannonball.

JG Pasterjak wrote: So, there's two armadillos digging the living hell out of our back yard. At first it was cute. "Oh, they're just aerating it" we'd say. Now it's gone too far, and they've earned themselves a trip to deep in the forest. They're completely unfazed by me, to the point where I can pet them, so grabbing them and sticking them in a dog crate won't be a problem. But here's my question: Do armadillos freak out and suddenly develop retard strength when they feel threatened? I expect they'll squirm a little, but should I wear welding gloves and a full face helmet so I don't get jail raped by an armadillo? Anyone ever actually handle one of these things? jg

I couldn't love GRM the magazine or the website more, and believe me, I don't like to be the P.C police or anything or the guy who has a problem with everything thing, but I do have a problem with this...

I find it a bit offensive that you use terms like "aerating," "forest," and "handle" etc etc... for your little descriptions or whatever in the editorials. I myself do not have armidillos, nor am I jail raped or anything, but I feel sensitivity for people with marsupials as I am a student taking your taxpayer money, and my Girlfriend is pursuing her masters in the retard strength.

These terms although I'm pretty sure are not even real words, are obviously meant to resemble the words used to describe people with desireable vehicles, and it appears that they are used on these boards in a joking sense which, as I view it, makes light of people who are afflicted with animalistic disabilities.

Armadillo = possum on the half shell.

Wally wrote:

Chris Brown said: Yeah, I *was* hittin that

Corrected

beware the armadillo,ive seen them get even...

One of the funniest things ive ever seen involved an armadillo.. One of my lieutenants (when i was a LEO) decided to kick one out side the command center where they were in abundance (he was an ass to everyone, not just the dillo..) he lined up, and gave it a field goal type kick, the thing went sailing, then bounced off the chain link fence nearby and flew right back at him, hitting him square in the face and sticking there for a second or two like the creature from aliens, hanging onto him with all four claws in his hair/ears.. when it dropped to the ground, the three or four other armadillos that were rooting around, all curled up into balls at the same time, including the one that had stuck to his face...he went screaming and running away like a little girl, he was phobic about armadillos... he never lived it down,and had scratches across his face for quite some time, but also never mistreated the armadillos again...

Jensenman wrote: Armadillo = possum on the half shell.

I was waiting for someone to post that. Thanks.

Mmmm...good eatin'..

2 pages and still no Jimmy Buffet references?

A.I.D.S. Burger in Paradise? Personally, I could live the rest of my days without a Jimmy Buffet reference.

poopshovel wrote:

2 pages and still no Jimmy Buffet references?

A.I.D.S. Burger in Paradise? Personally, I could live the rest of my days without a Jimmy Buffet reference.

Not that song; the other one he sang about taking an ugly woman home from a bar. The one that looked like an armadillo. I'm no huge Buffet fan, but I thought the song was kind of a classic.Maybe I was wrong.

As far as Buffet goes, my favorite is "Come Monday" but any thing about warm sandy place works fine too.

Speaking of armadillos (in pants): http://voices.washingtonpost.com/commons/2009/02/tap_into_the_future_who_should.html

All I know about Armadillos: they're moving North. I've seen them as close as ~40 miles SW of St. Louis. They don't seem like terribly formidable foes - anything that has a hard time crossing the street without getting got is likely a fairly easy target for even a mediocre shot like myself - but, of course, this can only mean one thing: THEY ARE INVADING OUR TOWNS AND CITIES! NOWHERE IS SAFE! THE INVASION IS IMMINENT, AND NO ONE REALIZES IT!

I, for one, welcome our new armadillo overlords.

I've always thought they were kinda cool, and we don't have them up here (except on the Molson's Export bottle).. so, since you have two, can you send me one?

NYG95GA wrote:

poopshovel wrote:

2 pages and still no Jimmy Buffet references?

A.I.D.S. Burger in Paradise? Personally, I could live the rest of my days without a Jimmy Buffet reference.

Not that song; the other one he sang about taking an ugly woman home from a bar. The one that looked like an armadillo. I'm no huge Buffet fan, but I thought the song was kind of a classic.Maybe I was wrong.

ALL Jimmy Buffet Songs are classics. Remember, the order is Buffett, God, Suddards, then the rest of us. :)