Body Confidence, Modeling, Influencers and Adult Entertainment

Toyman01 + Sized and said:

The trick is knowing when to keep the mouth shut.

I still don't get why anyone randomly says anything to someone they don't know. 

ddavidv said:

Genuine desire cannot be negotiated.

Paul_VR6 (Forum Supporter) said:

Toyman01 + Sized and said:

The trick is knowing when to keep the mouth shut.

I still don't get why anyone randomly says anything to someone they don't know. 

How in the world would any of us ever get to know anyone if we never talked to someone we don't know?

Paul_VR6 (Forum Supporter) said:

Toyman01 + Sized and said:

The trick is knowing when to keep the mouth shut.

I still don't get why anyone randomly says anything to someone they don't know. 

I spent 9 hours on a plane to Amsterdam with a 20-something girl from Barcelona in the seat next to me.

I could have listened to her read the dictionary...

Paul_VR6 (Forum Supporter) said:

Toyman01 + Sized and said:

The trick is knowing when to keep the mouth shut.

I still don't get why anyone randomly says anything to someone they don't know. 

That's how reasonable humans meet other humans.

Paul_VR6 (Forum Supporter) said:

Toyman01 + Sized and said:

The trick is knowing when to keep the mouth shut.

I still don't get why anyone randomly says anything to someone they don't know. 

Every single person you know was once a total stranger. 

ShawnG said:

Paul_VR6 (Forum Supporter) said:

Toyman01 + Sized and said:

The trick is knowing when to keep the mouth shut.

I still don't get why anyone randomly says anything to someone they don't know. 

I spent 9 hours on a plane to Amsterdam with a 20-something girl from Barcelona in the seat next to me.

I could have listened to her read the dictionary...

I spent an entire night on a train out of Venice talking to a man from Kuwait and a lady from Sweden.  They were good company. I hope they felt the same of me. 

In other words, early humans are eating dead animals. [...]  The only problem is, the first edged weapons only appeared 200,000 years ago.  So somehow, for nearly 2 million years, we are killing animals without any weapons.  Now, we're not using our strength, because we're the biggest sissies in the jungle.  Every other animal is stronger than we are, they have fangs, they have claws, they have nimbleness, they have speed.  We think Usain Bolt is fast.  Usain Bolt can get his ass kicked by a squirrel.  We're not fast.

'Survival of the Fittest', isn't solely and completely explained by "women only mate with the strongest man".  It's readily arguable/provable: if that was the case, then 'near sightedness' wouldn't be common and inheritable trait (among many other traits that 'decrease' our general physical capacity/ability).  So, I'm not particularly moved by the arguments that "[this] is the way it has always been, and alternatives to it are [insert your preferred declaration of the status quo]."

Similarly, just because dating/courtship... or general public discourse... was a certain way at a certain time, does not preclude it changing now or in the future.  And while, that can certainly be troubling and fear-inducing to people who learned a set way of going about intersex dialogue... that doesn't mean that a) passion will go away,  b) people won't be able to talk to other people,   c) that some people will like the 'old way' of dating/courting,  d).  other possibilities I don't feel like categorizing right now.  It simply means that there will be a new way to go about it, and that might apply to the majority of people... and yes, that might mean it will be harder for those people who insist on relying on the only thing they learned.  It is completely possible that there will be a reaction to the current shift in mores/expectations, and we'll go back to Victorian era norms about supervised meetings, and one side of a relationship having to subsume their thoughts and feelings about their suitor in deference to their parents'/family's convictions.  Or maybe we'll go even further back, and be more like the Minoan?

what does this mean for pheller?
from my perspective... I'd suggest that consider the following things:    Teach them how things are working now, find them resources for how to ask and give consent; and what to do if someone does something without their consent.  You could teach them how things used to be, and you can give them outlooks on how things could be in the future.  Hopefully you'll teach them to be proud of themselves, their bodies, their brains, their emotions, and their ultimate capabilities.  I sincerely hope that you teach them to not let other people define who they are; and that they take measured and consider decisions about who they are and how they act.  I suggest that you teach them resilience, flexibility, and curiosity... especially in the face of people misunderstanding what they're doing, or what they're saying... those traits's will make a big difference in how they manage the bombardment of messages and influences they/us will-be/are subjected to; and my experience has been that a keen interest in learning things that were unavailable to be learned when they were first learning things is particularly useful in navigating the world of changes that we're currently surrounded by.

as ever:  ymmv, iirc, no this isn't an attack, I understand that you probably see things differently, these are just like my opinions... man, recall one of the rules: 
"You will try to raise your standards, since this particular party has some pretty smart people present and, once again, you don't want to look like an idiot standing in the middle of the room. "

In reply to sleepyhead the buffalo :

So, you're saying, "Good parenting". 
 

Yep. I agree. 

In reply to sleepyhead the buffalo :

Well said. 

I would add strength to your list. Not necessarily physical strength, but strength of personality and strength to control their emotions. Not to turn them off, but to not be ruled by them.

I would also add self-sufficiency in all things. Teach them that they are a complete person as they are and able to stand on their own. Relationships with others should be complementary not completing. 

sleepyhead the buffalo said:

Similarly, just because dating/courtship... or general public discourse... was a certain way at a certain time, does not preclude it changing now or in the future.  And while, that can certainly be troubling and fear-inducing to people who learned a set way of going about intersex dialogue

You mean like for all those men who were similarly disoriented and dismayed when they learned that a firm cupping of the buttock is not actually a complementary way to show women gratitude and appreciation?

A key component in how the fittest survive, and thrive, is adaptability.

ShawnG said:

In reply to pheller :

Both of them have belly buttons for some reason.

Now THAT is funny.

SVreX (Forum Supporter) said:

Paul_VR6 (Forum Supporter) said:

Toyman01 + Sized and said:

The trick is knowing when to keep the mouth shut.

I still don't get why anyone randomly says anything to someone they don't know. 

How in the world would any of us ever get to know anyone if we never talked to someone we don't know?

And after kissing the blarney stone back in 2001 I'm way bad on keepin me mouth shut.

SVreX (Forum Supporter) said:

How in the world would any of us ever get to know anyone if we never talked to someone we don't know?

Fine by me  only acceptable caveat is "Nice GRM shirt!"