Who's been snipped? Advice thread!

I am not sure this appropriate, but I will take my chances.......

Getting the easy touch snip snip this Friday. Minimally invasive. Supposedly quick recovery. In and out in less than an hour. I have no issues dropping trouser in front of peope I dont know in a city far away......I am curious as to what its like afterwards? I have heard frozen veggies help.....and rest.  Any other top tips?

Thanks!

EDIT - Update.

Easy. Literally the hardest part was paying my out of pocket portion.  Went in, got checked out. Met the nurse and doc.  Doc and I went into a room, dropped trousers.  Laid back and watched Gold Diggers on a overhead TV, made small talk. Wondering when hes gonna start after the pain killers were injected......Doc says "ok left side done"....huh? Then he knocks out the right side.  

Less than 10 minutes.  

Pain is and was minimal.  No Valium, just local with a air injector thing and a needle once that kicked in. Pain after the fact, minimal. Every now and then the boys remind me something is different. Bleeding has stopped. Showers taken. Life resumes.  

Short version? Minimal pain. Quick process. No peas.

This is definitely better suited to the off topic forum, and also it has actually been discussed there before.

get 3 bags of frozen peas. rotate reglarly. Make inappropriate jokes to the SO about how big your junk is while it's swollen. 

Learn me: getting snipped| Off-Topic Discussion forum | (grassrootsmotorsports.com)

Get it done on a Friday morning.  Take the rest of the day off.

Spend long weekend sitting on the couch playing quiet-ish video games, watching movies, and reading.  Resist temptation to do much else even though you'll feel pretty good.

Rotate frozen peas frequently as mentioned above (wrap bags in a dishcloth or towel).

Go to work on Monday morning as normal, unless you're a stevedore or coal miner.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST:

Confirm zero sperm count with doctor before unprotected nookie.

I have a neighbor with 5 kids because they "stopped after 3".  He didn't wait for test results.  The last one was twins.

I had it done a couple years back. Initial recovery wasn't bad - about a weekend as mentioned. I cycle a lot and to this day I still have some weird feelings on the bike from time to time that weren't there before. Not pain, just feels weird sometimes.

All in all, I don't regret doing it. 

Duke said:

 

Confirm zero sperm count with doctor before unprotected nookie.

I have a neighbor with 5 kids because they "stopped after 3".  He didn't wait for results.  The last one was twins.

 

How long does confirmation take from day of surgery?

How long is total days out of service before nookie?

In reply to mr2s2000elise :

How long it takes to reach zero depends on the person.  For me it was about a month or 6 weeks.

You can have nookie before that.  You just have to assume the ammunition is live.  I was out of action maybe a week.

Duke said:

In reply to mr2s2000elise :

How long it takes to reach zero depends on the person.  For me it was about a month or 6 weeks.

You can have nookie before that.  You just have to assume the ammunition is live.  I was out of action maybe a week.

 

Thank you. So out of action about a week, and for production to be stopped, max 6 weeks. Durign that 6 weeks, do you have to constantly go to the Doc to get the count checked till it drops level to 0 ?

mr2s2000elise said:

Duke said:

 

Confirm zero sperm count with doctor before unprotected nookie.

I have a neighbor with 5 kids because they "stopped after 3".  He didn't wait for results.  The last one was twins.

 

How long does confirmation take from day of surgery?

How long is total days out of service before nookie?

no lie- after 20 ejaculations.  Have fun, it's definitely a race!  :p

But seriously, have had a bunch of junk surgeries done, for random reasons-  Vasectomy, sperm extraction (post vasectomy for IVF purposes), and finally vasectomy reversal (new wife, new life).  The vasectomy was far and away the easiest and least painful.  I'd say by day 4 you're ready to do normal life resumptions.  By day 7 I was back at the gym not being dumb, and after two weeks, the only thing I noticed was that my sack was still purple, but not painful.  

The way the Dr put it to me was this-  Have 20 'episodes' assuming you're still shooting live ammunition, then get tested.  If it's zero, congrats!  If it's not, shoot 20 more rounds.  Continue until you're zero. 

I was zero on the first test after the 20 times.  Perhaps more disconcerting than the surgery itself was jerking off into a cup in a doctors office patient room, with the junky old travel dvd player playing porn on a sterilized medical tray.  What a world, man... 

mr2s2000elise said:

Thank you. So out of action about a week, and for production to be stopped, max 6 weeks. Durign that 6 weeks, do you have to constantly go to the Doc to get the count checked till it drops level to 0 ?

Depends on how eager you are to go without a net.  I think I went once at a month and still had some.  Went back 2 weeks later and they confirmed zero.  Your doctor will advise you, but it will be something along that line.

The important part is just to remember that there are still one in the chamber even if the mag has been removed.

I had it done... twice.  I was just too much man for one vasectomy.  Actually, my body reacted rather quickly to the intrusion and tucked my boys in making it harder for the doc to find both vas deferens.  Our assumption is that he found the same one twice.  He was ridiculously apologetic and feared some kind of lawsuit, but I'm not that kind of guy.  Plus, his assistant was smoking hot, and having her play with my balls wasn't a terrible thing.

When you begin prepping, they'll put a heating pad on your balls to get them to relax.  Then once the doc starts poking, your body will want to protect and suck them back inside.  Most men's bodies must react slower than mine.

The only uncomfortable part is the initial numbing shot.  The cluster of nerves in the center (the one that makes you double over in pain when you get tagged in the sack) has to be directly injected.  With one hand, the doc pinches that nerve cluster and with the other hand sticks a needle in it.  You get 10 seconds of feeling like you've been punched in the nuts and then it's all numb.

Once the numbing wears off, it will feel like you've been lightly punched in the nuts for a couple days, but it wasn't intrusive or disrupting.  Frozen peas are recommended mostly because they are small and easier to conform to your anatomy, but ice works just fine.  At bedtime I would wear two pairs of underwear and stick a frozen gel pack in between them.  That way the ice would stay where it needed to if I moved.

If you have access to a microscope, you can test yourself instead of paying for a lab to do it.... provided you are confident enough in your methods.  My now-ex wife was a veterinarian, so I um... collected a sample and took it to the lab at the clinic and, lo and behold, I still had millions of swimmers.  Back to the doc and then retested... no swimmers.  In most cases, you have to pay in full for the sperm test because it is a follow-up to an elective surgery which is why I tested myself.  In my case, though, since the doc felt bad about the two vasectomies, he double checked mine for free.

In my situation, the wife and I were very much not wanting kids, and the stress of her pills, my condoms, and the small potential for getting pregnant anyway was affecting our sex life.  It was a great choice for me.  After we divorced, I did feel 10% regretful.  I was concerned that if I met someone else and she and I had the type of relationship that led me to possibly want children, it was now going to mean another surgical procedure to harvest cells from me and make a test tube baby.  But seriously, I'm so glad I did it.  I never have to worry about pregnancy.

My doctor had a vasectomy day. He had one day a week where he did them all day long. We were all lined up between screens. Took him about a minute and he said "now you are a new woman" and rushed off to the next curtain. All in all it was a good thing. My wife was very nice to me and was excited to test drive the new gear.

Oh, one other thing.  Ask doctors about how the procedure goes.  There are several different methods.  One involves a snip and a tiny clamp.  In some rare cases, the clamp causes the ends of the vas to just die and the clamp falls off.  If that happens, you have two open ends and it is possible for some swimmers to make the journey by accident.

In some procedures there is potential for the ends of the cut vas to come in contact with each other and begin to heal which basically reverses the process.

The procedure my doc did has a 0% re-occurence rate.  It involved not just cutting, but removing an inch or so, so there was no way for them to re-connect accidentally.  Then he cauterized the ends of the downstream side so they would heal closed with tissue.  No chance of reconnection, and no chance of accidental swimmers making it across the pond.

My doc not only sectioned the vas, but he cut a little incision in the surrounding tissue and tucked the downstream end into that so when it all heals it is totally contained and inaccessible.

My only (slight) regret is that sometimes I miss being able to make as big a mess as I used to.  I'd say my output is down 50%.  No loss or change of that lovin' feeling.

Had mine done 5.5 years ago after the birth of my second kid. I have never regretted it. Sometimes there's still a "pressure" feeling or sensitivity, but it's nothing big. Definitely ice pack and rest, don't autocross two days later like I did...

Duke said:

My doc not only sectioned the vas, but he cut a little incision in the surrounding tissue and tucked the downstream end into that so when it all heals it is totally contained and inaccessible.

My only (slight) regret is that sometimes I miss being able to make as big a mess as I used to.  I'd say my output is down 50%.  No loss or change of that lovin' feeling.

 

I noticed that as well.  It's kind of a benefit if you think about it.

In reply to Curtis73 (Forum Supporter) :

Yes, there are advantages without doubt, but sometimes the situation calls for some showmanship.

In reply to Duke :

I'm not going to explore this any further out of a distinct fear of unwanted mental imagery.

Duke said:

My only (slight) regret is that sometimes I miss being able to make as big a mess as I used to.  I'd say my output is down 50%.  No loss or change of that lovin' feeling.

 

Wow that's a HUGE bummer! You should have mentioned THAT part In the beginning ! 50% less output makes facial a no go. Which makes this surgery a no go . Mistress + no big mess = what's the use 

bearmtnmartin said:

My doctor had a vasectomy day. He had one day a week where he did them all day long. We were all lined up between screens. Took him about a minute and he said "now you are a new woman" and rushed off to the next curtain. All in all it was a good thing. My wife was very nice to me and was excited to test drive the new gear.

Similarly, when I had my consult I jokingly asked the doctor how many he vasectomies he's performed, and he deadpan said without missing a beat 'I stopped counting after 10,000'.  I was impressed.  That's a lot of scrotums! 

My buddies insist that the best advice is to do it right before march madness starts. 

My apologies for not posting in the correct forum. Idk what I was thinking. Thank you for moving it, whoever did.

Other than the great advice...........this has turned out great! Jokes and innuendos aplenty.  I am not sure I am eager to go back to a city 2 hours away just to jack off in a cup.  Needs must?  Idk......not a fan. I think I will give the wife the job and milk it out as much as I can (see what I did there)?

We had a deal where I was to get a PS5 or XBSX but as that appears to not be happeing.....lots of youtube vids.

Any suggestions?  

Wait......no more peter north level explosions?