Buying Rings

Not of the piston type.

I've been with my girlfriend for five years in March. We own a house and two dogs together, yada yada. We have plans to get married, but it's getting time I act on it.

First thing, I'm not doing it at Christmas or New Years (her birthday). Too cheesy and she'll call me out on it, but I am probably looking to buy after the holidays when prices tend to go down.

We don't have a lot of money. We tie most of it up in the house, her grad degree, or a small racing budget. The old DeBeer's sponsored idea of "two months salary" is just a little too much for us to spend. She's a simple lady who doesn't wear much jewelry to begin with, so she wouldn't like anything very over the top.

What type of price range is reasonable for this sort of thing?

We can discuss how to do a GRM wedding later.

Thanks!

Chuck and I had a very similar situation, bought a house and a car together before we were married, lived together for many years before getting married. When the time came for Chuck to get a ring, his mom offered him the choice between his grandmother's ring and his great-grand mother's ring to give me. Money was tight for us and she didn't want that to hold us up any longer. Having his grandmother's ring and his own mother's offer for me to have it means so much more to me than a store bought ring would have.

Perhaps there is a family ring?

Oh yeah, and congrats!

When I proposed, I didn't have a ring. Her response was "In time it will be doing dishes and scooping baby $heet, take me to dinner and we'll call it even".

My son just proposed on Halloween for all the reasons you cited above. Does she have a favorite stone, not diamonds?

Dan

I took my wife with me and let her pick out what she liked since she was going to wear it on her hand. It takes away the surprise, but at this point, who cares?

She bought me a new gold ring five years ago at Sam's Club for $100. I never take it off and it gets abuse.

I wanted to surprise her, so I was on my own for shopping. That said, I knew her taste in jewlery was simple. Ended up with a 3/4 Ct. Round Solitaire that she loves. No idea what prices have done in the last decade, but it was pretty affordable. Nowhere close to 2 months.

I did consider taking her with, but the way things are for us now, it could still be a surprise (at least on timing).

No family ring that I know of (I'm just not that lucky!).

No real stone preference either, but I just assumed diamond was the way to go on this one. She does not like gold.

I did find tire-tread rings - she said no.

DILYSI Dave wrote: I wanted to surprise her, so I was on my own for shopping. That said, I knew her taste in jewlery was simple. Ended up with a 3/4 Ct. Round Solitaire that she loves. No idea what prices have done in the last decade, but it was pretty affordable. Nowhere close to 2 months.

I've looked at those. They tend to land at $500, which is certainly reasonable. I'd been looking between $500-1000, but wanted to make sure I wasn't being too cheap about it.

She's an Irish girl, so I've looked into some stuff in that sense, but most are really Celtic looking, and I just don't see that working for her. She has a Claddagh that she wears all the time, so I wouldn't want to compete with that.

DILYSI Dave wrote: I wanted to surprise her, so I was on my own for shopping. That said, I knew her taste in jewlery was simple. Ended up with a 3/4 Ct. Round Solitaire that she loves. No idea what prices have done in the last decade, but it was pretty affordable. Nowhere close to 2 months.

pretty much same boat here. as an engineer, i wanted the least number of internal flaws, the brightest color, etc, that i could reasonablly afford. so ended up with a .75ct. round, VS2 clarity, F color. i sold a 32k-original-mile '69 corvair to buy the ring. it was a good deal for me.

I proposed with a true Gum Ball ring but you could substitue any cheap simple ring and maybe even add some humor.

I proposed on a Friday night and I knew our Saturday would be open. For Saturday I had reservations set up around town to look at many different rings which I thought she might like. The best deal that I had found was on a three stone ring but she wanted a solitare (or so her friends thought.) In one store, late in the day, her eyes fell on a 3 stone. It was nowhere near as nice (or the deal) that I found on the other 3 stone. We went to see the one that I liked and she loved it!

In my case, we had a stone that had been cut by my grandfather before he died along with a couple of other rocks. Janel picked her favorite (the first one) and we had it set. This way she got exactly what she wanted and it has a sentimental family connection as well.

You might try to seek out a local hippy-dippy type jewelry shop that does repairs and custom work - with low overhead.

I paid just over half of what a comparable ring would have cost at a mainstream store.

And spend a little above your comfort zone. You want to be happy with it in 20 years, not just in 20 days.

I did the same as Dave. Two months pay is a bit much. I went with a small independant jeweler. The price and service were better than anyone in the mall. They try and keep you happy because in most cases they know you'll be buying more later.

Buy used. Its waaaay cheaper than new (figure half price). If she likes old stuff, there's probably a place in your area that specializes in reselling estate jewelry or vintage stuff.

I'm not sure where the $500 for a 0.75 carat solitaire comes from. You can spend 10 times that much on the same size stone if you want a higher quality diamond.

Nothing says I love you forever like a tattoo.

Can I reccomend someone? The company I work for has a broad range of prices and they ship every where. Now is a good time to be buying. Let me know if you want the web site.

Spend what you can afford. Don't go into debt. DeBeers says 2 months salary. Right. I wish I was in an industry that could dictate how much people should spend based on their salary. Anyway, pick a number that you are comfortable with and get it in cash/have it deposited in your checking account. Then find where the wholesalers are in your area. Remember that the markup you see at the mall is 300%. Maybe higher. Go to the wholesale district and start looking. You buy diamonds like hamburger, by the pound (or carat, as the case may be, it's just a conversion factor at that point) and the wholesalers will sell to anyone with a checkbook. Look for an E or F color and accept some flaws. No one can tell the difference at that point anyway, especially between a D and E. D to F most people couldn't tell either, unless they were side by side. Then tell them what style setting you want and tell them to have it mounted. This way, you either wind up with a ring/set at 1/3 the cost or with 3 times as much ring for your dollar.

I knew I was moving to another state when I proposed (she knew it, too), so I went to a large chain store that had a location in both cities. Losing a diamond can be expensive, and this chain has a guarantee against such thing. She has to have the ring cleaned and inspected (5 minute job) every six months as a condition of the guarantee.

Also, this place let me buy a cheapie for the "engagement", and trade it in full-value against something that she decided on. I don't want my wife looking at her ring thinking "why did he choose this one?".

If you can't afford much, ask some of her family members (if they can keep a secret). The ring I bought my wife is kinda blingy, and she works on downtown Detroit, so she often wears her grandmother's band. It was given to her by her parents the night before our wedding. It still has the original engraving, chosen by her grandfather. Sometimes I think it has more sentimental value than my ring.

I guess her other two sisters will get grandma's ashes or something. My wife was the first sibling to get married, so the other two can suck it.

porksboy wrote: Can I reccomend someone? The company I work for has a broad range of prices and they ship every where. Now is a good time to be buying. Let me know if you want the web site.

Please do. If you don't want to post it up here, you can email me at paul (dot) przyborski (at) gmail (dot) com

Not sure why I bothered to do that. Web developer for a gov'ment agency... My name is all over google.

Dr. Hess wrote: Spend what you can afford. Don't go into debt. DeBeers says 2 months salary. Right. I wish I was in an industry that could dictate how much people should spend based on their salary. Anyway, pick a number that you are comfortable with and get it in cash/have it deposited in your checking account. Then find where the wholesalers are in your area. Remember that the markup you see at the mall is 300%. Maybe higher. Go to the wholesale district and start looking. You buy diamonds like hamburger, by the pound (or carot, as the case may be, it's just a conversion factor at that point) and the wholesalers will sell to anyone with a checkbook. Look for an E or F color and accept some flaws. No one can tell the difference at that point anyway, especially between a D and E. D to F most people couldn't tell either, unless they were side by side. Then tell them what style setting you want and tell them to have it mounted. This way, you either wind up with a ring/set at 1/3 the cost or with 3 times as much ring for your dollar.

Wow Hess. That was some really solid information. Thanks!

Dr. Hess wrote: find where the wholesalers are in your area.

We went to Jeweler's Row in downtown Chicago and met with my wife's friend. They sold us the diamond first, then did the ring setting.

Back in 1986, I spent $1500 and it was all cash. I agree to not go into debt for a ring.......

NP. When you're dealing with wholesalers, keep in mind they are not the mall jewelry store. Know what you want and be ready to buy when you see it. The place we went in Houston was an office building. I call it "Little Jerusalem" based on all the names on the doors. They beep you in the door. Don't expect a display. You tell them what you're looking for, they pull a tray out of the safe, pick a stone, weigh it, tell you about what the grading and weight is, hand you the diamond and a loup for you to inspect it. You ask how much, they tell you so much a carat. You can then offer them Y/carat and go from there. Remember, it is Little Jerusalem and they are expecing a certain amount of bargaining but margins are much thinner at the wholesale level. If you have a picture of the setting you want, that would probably speed it up even more. Those settings are all boilerplate too, right out of a standard catalog. Most of the jewelry stores sell stones from these people on consignmentat 3X the price plus interest. The wholesaler will even tell you "I can give you an appraisal at anything you want up to 3X the price."

I had a pretty good sized wad in my pocket and asked Leann what KIND of ring she wanted, knowing I could afford it if she got out of hand.

She requested plain matching white gold bands and a small round cut solitaire. (Specifically she said no MORE than a half carat, but the smaller the better) I love my her cheap ass as much as she loves me.

My wife was not into diamonds (thank goodness) and wanted something simple. We had decided on Titanium rings (this was 10 years ago before they were the "in" thing) and paid $150 for our wedding bands.

I surprised her with a titanium engagement ring. I bought a loose sapphire stone and had it mounted in a tension mount from this place: http://www.titaniumrings.com/tensionsmall.html

They were great to deal with and the ring was beautiful.

Just an idea of something different, elegant (in my opinion) and not overpriced.

-Rob

I spent decent money(for us, anyway)on a ring for my wife - I made my own out of aluminum in the garage.

Wow. I guess I shouldn't admit that I had my wife when we were married 2 years pick out a ring at the military post exchange we were stationed at the time and bought it on layaway. A simple single diamond and plain band. She got it when it was paid for. I spent my savings getting her to the states on a fiance` visa then we had a daughter a year later so it waited until we could afford more. Our youngest daughter (21yo) works at a jewelry store and helped add more to the ring last Xmas. I don't have a band and wouldn't wear it anyway. 27 years and counting with her and her simple tastes.

http://www.circa1930s.com/

I bought Jamie's wedding band and engagement ring through these people. The woman who runs it is great.

Also, and I'm not a big fan of trying to one up everyone else, or one to care much what others think, but it does kinda suck when your wife's friend say "Oh, that's cute!" about her ring. She didn't want a big diamond, and I couldnt afford much, but it still sucks a little. I think I spent about 700 on hers.

Joey