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Dirtydog
Dirtydog GRM+ Memberand HalfDork
6/1/18 9:34 a.m.

Yesterday, on the way to the Pain Management Doctor, with my wife, I had an epiphany. I've become "That Old E36M3!!"

1. Social Security recipients.  - check

2. Drives a Lincoln.  -check

3. Drives slower.  -check

4. Wife telling me to watch the potholes.  -check

5. Getting in all the inconsiderate  "hot rods" way, and enjoying it!  -check

If anyone has anything to add to the list, please do.

mad_machine
mad_machine GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
6/1/18 9:39 a.m.

hitting the brakes for no apparent reason? 

Leaving turn signal on for miles? 

too short to see over the steering wheel?

Ovid_and_Flem
Ovid_and_Flem Dork
6/1/18 9:50 a.m.

Gets Senior Discount without asking?

Young people hold door for you?

Cheap reading glasses everywhere?

 

Dirtydog
Dirtydog GRM+ Memberand HalfDork
6/1/18 9:54 a.m.

In reply to mad_machine :

At least my head is above the headrest.

spitfirebill
spitfirebill MegaDork
6/1/18 9:54 a.m.

Everybody calls you Sir? 

Dirtydog
Dirtydog GRM+ Memberand HalfDork
6/1/18 9:54 a.m.

In reply to Ovid_and_Flem :

All of the above. HAHA

Furious_E
Furious_E GRM+ Memberand SuperDork
6/1/18 9:55 a.m.

Dings, dents, scratches appearing on your car and you don't recall where they came from?

barefootskater
barefootskater Reader
6/1/18 9:57 a.m.

Parking your car in the drive thru lineup?

Endlessly talking about your worthless pickleball partner?

Merging on the interstate at 35mph?

Getting paid to say "Hello" at walmart?

Going to "The Buffet" at 5PM?

Dining in at Wendy's?

Pressing the touchscreen much harder when it doesn't work the first time?

Trading in the hog for a trike?

Going everywhere with significant-other in matching outfits?

Driving the wrong direction on a roundabout?

Complaining about all the damn Californians moving into town?

Still wishing B. J. Clinton was president?

Still complaining about Clinton?

 

I mean no offense to anyone! Happy Friday!

Dirtydog
Dirtydog GRM+ Memberand HalfDork
6/1/18 10:02 a.m.

In reply to barefootskater :

No offense taken.  I'm enjoying the ride.

1988RedT2
1988RedT2 UltimaDork
6/1/18 10:09 a.m.

On my way back this morning, I am conscious of a young buck riding my bumper.  I approach an awkward merge--an on-ramp, that merges with another on-ramp, before merging on the interstate, which then splits at a major exit.  I clearly have a yield sign.  I choose to brake gently to a stop (no real merge area--this location is frequently the site of rear-end accidents) and wait for two cars to pass rather than abuse my old minivan, which is not exactly fast.  I then proceed to the actual merge, where traffic is creeping along at about 10 mph.  I allow a space to open up ahead of me to allow a car, which was signaling, to get in front of me.  At no time did I brake abruptly.  A moment later, Mr. Impatient yanks his floored car into traffic.  And blows his horn.  Presumably at me. 

Surprisingly, I felt no anger, only a modicum of pity for the sort of self-absorbed young person who would get angry upon witnessing an example of civility.

Sonic
Sonic UltraDork
6/1/18 10:12 a.m.

A hat on the back shelf of a sedan.  When I see that, I know that driver is trouble.  

 

Extending that, old guys wearing hats are almost all like that, even if the hat is on their head instead of on the parcel shelf. 

frenchyd
frenchyd SuperDork
6/1/18 12:24 p.m.

In reply to 1988RedT2 :

Back to the oldies on the radio.  

8valve
8valve Reader
6/1/18 12:48 p.m.

You find yourself telling the youths the "back in my day" stories, that is the obvious give away you have no hope.  

And ditto redt2's story every. single. day.  In los angeles.  Yes, angry youths honking at me for driving with a touch of common sense and civility. 

Grizz
Grizz UberDork
6/1/18 12:53 p.m.

Obvious solution is to make it a Hot Rod Lincoln.

Sine_Qua_Non
Sine_Qua_Non SuperDork
6/1/18 2:09 p.m.

Have you whipped out your AARP card yet?

Appleseed
Appleseed MegaDork
6/1/18 2:14 p.m.

Do you have "blue" hair?

Did you fight in the war? 

Do you hate FM radio?

Stampie
Stampie GRM+ Memberand UltraDork
6/1/18 2:37 p.m.
spitfirebill said:

Everybody calls you Sir? 

Everybody calls you "young man"?

 

Woody
Woody GRM+ Memberand MegaDork
6/1/18 2:44 p.m.

My current dream car is a used sedan with automatic transmission. 

Ovid_and_Flem
Ovid_and_Flem Dork
6/1/18 2:55 p.m.

People admire your patience but in reality you just don't give a E36 M3 anymore. 

EastCoastMojo
EastCoastMojo GRM+ Memberand Mod Squad
6/1/18 3:32 p.m.

I came here to post about hats on shelfs. Had a few chuckles at the suggestions. 

I knew I was old when I heard the elevator muzak version of an Ozzy song, snd that was years ago. Guess I should buy a hat and a sedan to put it on...

oh yeah, get the berkeley off my lawn!

Suprf1y
Suprf1y PowerDork
6/1/18 3:38 p.m.
Ovid_and_Flem said:

Gets Senior Discount without asking?

A few years ago we went into McDonalds to get a coffee. I was sweet talking the young good looking girl behind the counter, totally pulling it off... and she gave me the senior's discount.

Ouch.

Grizz
Grizz UberDork
6/1/18 3:45 p.m.

In reply to Woody :

I've wanted to find myself behind the wheel of a large automobile even as a teenager though. Does this mean I'm old in spirit?

kazoospec
kazoospec SuperDork
6/1/18 3:47 p.m.

Campaign sticker on the bumper . . . from four elections ago.

Some sort of rhythmic scraping sound coming from the back end of the car . . . no apparent berk's given.

"Chrome" hubcaps . . . at least one of which is missing. 

Driving the type of car (most likely a Buick) which makes other drivers think "I haven't seen one of those in a decade."

Yappy, fluffy small dog on the front seat.

Furious_E
Furious_E GRM+ Memberand SuperDork
6/1/18 4:14 p.m.
Grizz said:

In reply to Woody :

I've wanted to find myself behind the wheel of a large automobile even as a teenager though. Does this mean I'm old in spirit?

No, you simply understood the value of a bench seat in certain situations devil

Furious_E
Furious_E GRM+ Memberand SuperDork
6/1/18 4:18 p.m.

In reply to 1988RedT2 :

I'm having a bit of a hard time picturing the exact merge situation described here, but generally I think that is a completely appropriate reaction to someone stopping at the end of an on ramp. That is exactly how you get rear ended.

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