Ever quit a career without a plan of what's next?

Like the title says, anyone quit and leave a long-term career, without a real plan for what to do next?

I've been working for software companies for most of my professional life, most often in a QA role.  The nature of the job has changed in recent years, where more and more programming is necessary, and it is something I have struggled with.  It is finally coming to a head lately, and I have spent the last year pretty much behind the eight ball, and while I am trying, I just am not sure I am capable of what they need me to do.  If it was a lower pressure environment, I might be able to adapt, but it is a very hard charging company.  I may be able to shift over to the product department, and get away from coding, but it'll still be fast-paced, and while I've done that kind of work before, it require more assertiveness than I have to do it really well.  The company as a whole is one of the more ethically run ones I've worked for, though, which has been a positive compared to some previous employers.  While I know it's not good to get attached to a company, other than the workload, this is a very good one to work for.

My wife and I generally live well beneath our means (though a little less so since I bought a new car a few months back), so I've given some thought to just stepping away from a job for a while.  Biggest disadvantage to that is I am in my late 40s and age discrimination is a real thing in the tech world, so I'd likely be killing my income potential for the rest of my life if I did try go back to work in the field.  Not to mention, it is nice to have two incomes, just in case either of us loses our jobs involuntarily.   I had planned on retiring at 55 (and doing a lot of expensive travel and car stuff), but unless the market seriously recovers soon, I'm going to have to tack on a few more years to that number.

I do worry about both our health on our current course.  End of the workday has me usually trying to either learn more, or just working longer to try to keep up, and my wife is not up to much, especially on days she goes to the office (hybrid work environment).  The only break we have is the weekend, and even then, it seems like neither of us have much energy to get a lot done.  I've thought if I wasn't working, I could pretty much get everything done around the house, and cook much healthier meals than we usually eat.  And with household stuff dealt with during the week, we'd be more likely to get out and get moving some on the weekends.

So, long and rambling, but just curious, has anyone here stepped away from a career, and just kind of seen how things would go for a while, instead of jumping back into another full time job?  If so, how'd it go, and how old were you when you did it?  Advice is welcome. 

I haven't but I really empathize with you.

I've had to become skilled at things I'm not naturally talented at or even interested in to remain useful and it's not fun at all.

I'm a decade older than you so I do have to chuckle a little at your feeling old although I do appreciate that you're in an industry that prizes youth.

If you can survive a year on your cash reserves and you only need 2/3ish of your current income, you should be OK.

Kinda related? I worked as an editor for environmental and engineering consulting firms for ~20 years, transitioned to IT at my last job during the pandemic. The IT was a E36 M3 show, so I quit in August.

I've found it to be really stressful not having a job, even tho my wife fully supports the decision, and I have a bunch of savings, so she's not supporting both of us. I think a lot of the stress is due to not having a berkeleying clue what to do next. I'm not going back to editing, not sure I can get an IT job. Mid-50s, btw. 

It's time to figure out what kind of work to pursue. I took a very good, inexpensive ($100), remote, career-transition workshop recently that lays out the process for figuring out what kind of work you can pivot to, then how to get a job. There's info about combating age-ism. Lmk if you're interested. 

For me, not having done some work to figure out my next career before quitting has soured much of the time I'd hoped to devote to stuff like working on cars and pursuing my other hobbies. If you aren't great at keeping stuff  looming over you out of mind until it's time to address it, then sort out, or at least start sorting out, your next move before bailing on your job. Good luck. 

I'll start by saying I never did that.

I am really hopeful the looming recession doesn't do it for me.

Regardless, I'm quite sympathetic to your plight. I do have one former coworker who quit and used the phrase "jump and the net will appear". I will always remember that.. but I have two kids in college and now's not the time despite having a good emergency fund there just in case. 

I had a plan, but didn't expect it to work. I spent 12 years working as a harness racing horseman, starting as a groom, then getting my trainer's and driver's licenses, working as a trainer, veterinary assistant, stable manager, breaking yearlings, etc.

I even taught myself how to restore and maintain a track when we shipped into county fairground where we were supposed to train for the summer, and the track was as hard as concrete, having last been used for a demolition derby the year before. Thirty hours over two days, and it was ready.

I quit to go to college, 14 years after high school, with the supposition that I would go to veterinary school. I knew that would never happen, having graduated from high school with a 1.8 GPA (although also having one of the top SAT scores in the county). I believed that if I had a chance to go to college, I should take it, and I would figure it out as I went along.

It worked out well, but although you asked, this thread is still about you, not me. I say, go for it.

procainestart said:

It's time to figure out what kind of work to pursue. I took a very good, inexpensive ($100), remote, career-transition workshop recently that lays out the process for figuring out what kind of work you can pivot to, then how to get a job. There's info about combating age-ism. Lmk if you're interested. 

 

Would definitely be interested.  Feel free to PM me a link if you don't want to post it on the thread.

Floating Doc (Forum Supporter) said:

I had a plan

I tend to have a plan, a backup plan, and a backup to the backup plan.  I've been beginning to wonder if that is not the best way to live my life.

Wife and I were DINKS and decided that she'll stay home and raise the kids and I'll push forward with my career.  We had some lean years but she was a hard worker and took on weekend or evening work. In the end it all worked out.  

Im a believer that you retire to something else.  Can't just sit around.  

I'm going to retire to work at Weathertech and be paid to ask people all day long what kind of car do they have. 

In reply to eastsideTim :

PM sent. Lmk if you don't get it.

eastsideTim said:

Floating Doc (Forum Supporter) said:

I had a plan

I tend to have a plan, a backup plan, and a backup to the backup plan.  I've been beginning to wonder if that is not the best way to live my life.

My boss once told me that he had enrolled in the prestigious Anderson MBA program at UCLA.

I asked him what he intended to do with the degree and he gave me a polished 30 second elevator speech.

I replied by saying "Nah, I think I'll just sell boner pills on EBay" and with his proper British accent (he's Indian) he calmly said "for those of us that lack such a sophisticated business plan, there's the MBA program at UCLA...bahaha!!!

Anyway, yes, I do believe that you can over think / over plan things...here's what plays in my head whenever I think I need to pull back a little.

Man Show Introduction

At 41, I quit engineering and got a master's in teaching. I was a teacher a little while, but I am back in engineering. I found a company that at least pretends to value work/life balance. I am not interested in killing myself for my career anymore.

I don't make as much as I would be if I never got out of it, but I am okay with that. I got back into it getting hired for the non-degree portion of the job.

You have an ethical company that sounds successful; that is rare, but maybe not what you need. Can you do what you do for a smaller, less successful but still steady work job? It sounds like taking a 20% pay cut but staying in the field could be doable. You might enjoy that.

I had two times in my life of not being certain I wanted to continue in my career. Both times I came back because I enjoy it. I had left not because I didn't like the path, but because I didn't like how I was walking it.

This past step back in, taking the non-degree version of the job, I focused on the fun parts and didn't have the high pressure parts and meetings. It was a 20% pay cut from where I would have been, and I was still human when I got home. It helped me. About to hit 51, for the timeline, and back in the degree version of the job, but with adjusted life priorities and am doing well.

Just my story.

Have you talked to your manager about how you feel? 

eastsideTim said:

procainestart said:

It's time to figure out what kind of work to pursue. I took a very good, inexpensive ($100), remote, career-transition workshop recently that lays out the process for figuring out what kind of work you can pivot to, then how to get a job. There's info about combating age-ism. Lmk if you're interested. 

 

Would definitely be interested.  Feel free to PM me a link if you don't want to post it on the thread.

Seconded!

Never have done it. I dislike what I'm doing now in finance. Not entirely sure why I went this direction. I'm right now caught up in an unhelpful "what if I had" scenario. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 33, and all of a sudden all of my unfulfilled, started and abandoned endeavors make sense. 

What if I had been diagnosed as a child? Where would I be today?

But that's pointless. I'm 33, in a decent spot financially, with my whole life ahead of me. So what do I want to do when I grow up? That's the hard part. I need a change. MBA? Masters in something else? Engineering? Healthcare? Start a business? Where do I go from here? Hopefully I'll win the lottery and I can take some time to figure it out. 

Javelin said:

eastsideTim said:

procainestart said:

It's time to figure out what kind of work to pursue. I took a very good, inexpensive ($100), remote, career-transition workshop recently that lays out the process for figuring out what kind of work you can pivot to, then how to get a job. There's info about combating age-ism. Lmk if you're interested. 

 

Would definitely be interested.  Feel free to PM me a link if you don't want to post it on the thread.

Seconded!

Thirded!

Never jump without knowing what is under the surface. 
 

Take some time to reflect on what you enjoy, what you do well, and what you might be called to do. Write it out with a pencil and paper. Then think about where those ideas lead you. Ask yourself where people do that kind of work. Find a way to get close to those places and people. Getting close might be a cup of coffee with a friend of a friend, taking a tour, volunteering, a phone call, a part time gig, etc...  

Short answer because I'm on mobile:

Yes, I left an industry and focused on running my own  business. Some years on now I'm starting to encounter success but it's a hard row to hoe. 

I have to agree that stepping out of a tech position in your 40's is likely to be a problem if you want back in.

I have jumped careers a bunch of times from hardware design to software to mfg engineering to systems engineering/consulting to technical sales to commissioned sales,etc. with some startups and layoffs thrown in for good measure.  It's a whole lot easier to find a job when you have a job, and the longer you're on the bench the harder it is to get back in.  With that in mind, what about a career switch into something related but different.  For instance, since you already know your company's product, perhaps moving to the implementation side of things, or technical presales, or some related position that leverages what you know?

In reply to Javelin :

The workshop is called Tools for Transition and is given (via four Zoom sessions over 2 weeks) by a Portland, OR-based career counselor with many years' experience and who has been providing the workshop for over a decade.

https://www.bluebridgecoaching.com/

She provided tons of great information on how to pivot and find work -- a *process* to achieve this. It's shaken me free of my what-the-berkeley-am-I-going-to-do-next paralysis.

Don't take my word for it -- check out the testimonials on her website. 

I've done it. I knew I had enough money stowed away to weather a storm for a while, which I feel is key to a move like this. I had no real plan - I just knew it was time to quit. The covid pandemic threw a curveball into my developing plans, but the time I spent during my hiatus proved very valuable as I focused on building new skills and finding new experiences that would benefit me down the road.

In reply to eastsideTim :

If you don’t have kids, your wife is on board* and health insurance coverage won’t be an issue, and you’re good at living below your means, go for it. Don’t overthink this.

Being good at living cheap means you can always get better at living cheap, and if it means getting out of a bad situation you’re going to live as cheap as possible out of pure spite. Take that, career I grew to hate!

You may be in your late 40s but if you don’t have children that makes you’re more like a hard 35. As I told the lady at the liquor store who did a double take at my drivers license, my secret is I didn’t have children. (Also that gin.) Furthermore, you are only going to get older.

If you decide to go back to school, here’s my perspective. I decided to switch careers at 42 and am about to finish a master’s in public health at 46 (the joke being that I’ve worked such lousy nonprofit jobs that I’m the only person in history to go into public health to make MORE money). I’ve been working this whole time, but if I could have swung it so I wasn’t, there’s a lot of things I would have done better and not sort of half-assed, which is how I did my first round of education. Give yourself the space to devote your whole self to education if you can. With your experience, I bet you could pick up money-making side projects if needed.

Also consider this: an increasing share of students are nontraditional, and as an older person you’d bring such perspective and, dare I say, a little wisdom to the classroom. We absolutely need more intergenerational interaction and understanding, especially since it’s another fault line we seem all too willing to crack along. If you need any help in thinking about going back to school in either a theoretical or logistical kind of way feel free to PM me as I’m a scholarship program manager and this is just where I “live” all day.

*When I say make sure your wife is on board, REALLY make sure she’s on board and not just capitulating to get you to shut up about it already. Also, make sure she knows what she’s getting into because you might be around the house annoying her a lot more than she bargained for. (Signed, a middle-aged man’s middle-aged wife.)

As bad as it is you may find the stress of living with a lower income and then trying to enter a new field at your age is even worse.  Twenty or so years ago my employer had everyone read a silly book called "Who moved the cheese".  Really worthwhile use of an hour, it reminded everyone that getting the cheese requires different strategies over time.  Your company sounds like they are better than most so before you jump consider another option to reduce the stress.  

Personally I found leaving one career and entering another involves more stress and less cheese.

RBCA said:

In reply to eastsideTim :

Also consider this: an increasing share of students are nontraditional, and as an older person you’d bring such perspective and, dare I say, a little wisdom to the classroom. We absolutely need more intergenerational interaction and understanding, especially since it’s another fault line we seem all too willing to crack along. If you need any help in thinking about going back to school in either a theoretical or logistical kind of way feel free to PM me as I’m a scholarship program manager and this is just where I “live” all day.

*When I say make sure your wife is on board, REALLY make sure she’s on board and not just capitulating to get you to shut up about it already. Also, make sure she knows what she’s getting into because you might be around the house annoying her a lot more than she bargained for. (Signed, a middle-aged man’s middle-aged wife.)

I've considered going back to school, possibly for something related to analytics, as that's been the focus of my testing work for a while, but I am frankly so burnt out that I am not sure I want to do anything even somewhat related to what I currently do.   I think the big problem with starting a new career that requires schooling is how close I am to theoretically retiring.  It feels weird to jump ship and spend large sums of money this late in the game to start over.

I do have a jump on being around all the time.  I work remote, so am pretty much always home.  I just might not be hiding in my basement office as much if I no longer have to be in front of a computer all day

porschenut said:

Personally I found leaving one career and entering another involves more stress and less cheese.

Definitely something I am thinking about.  I think this is also why I am more focused on the idea of either not working, or just doing some seasonal or part time work as I feel like it.  I'm not sure I want to be tied down to a regular job anymore.  A lot of it is trying to decide if I can adjust my personal living standards down, and give up on a few dreams.  I was planning on buying an RV and traveling heavily between the time my wife and I retire, and that would just not be feasible.  Nor would regular trips to attend or participate in motorsports events.

I haven't, but I'm definitely over my current job. There are a lot of people determining decisions for my area that have no experience in it, which is incredibly frustrating. 

But I'm also in a weird spot. I've been a Tech Writer for 16 years at this point (I turn 42 in March). If I want to make more money I need to learn coding/API stuff and if I were to start over in a new industry (My degree is Journalism with a specialization in Public Relations) I don't think I could afford the pay cut. 

Of course it didn't help that my fiance was without a job most of the year, so my cash reserves and debt aren't where I would prefer them to be.