Help me be a better me

nicksta43 wrote:

mazdeuce wrote: Make a dinner menu for the two weeks. Buy the ingredients for those dinners. Fresh veggies and meats for the beginning of the first week, moving to frozen veggies and meats for the second. When the menu says chicken Alfredo on Wednesday, you have the ingredients, so make it. Wake up 20 minutes earlier and eat breakfast and pack a lunch. Don't eat food accidentally. You know you're going to eat three times today, plan for it and do it. It helps a LOT when your spouse is on board so it's a team effort. I've got about a dozen really quick recipes if you need them.

I would have to make all the food on the weekend. It's simply not going to happen during the week. Hmm, we did get a food-saver vacuum thing for Christmas.

Look, it's not hard. You cook Saturday and you cook Sunday. Each time you plan a meal that has 4 servings instead of two. Now you have dinner for two of your week nights sitting in tupperware in the fridge. Now either you or your wife figures out how to cook one other night between Monday and Thursday. I can come up with two month's worth of meals that take less than 15 minutes from the time you open the fridge to the time you sit down to eat. The internet has a million good things to cook. Again, you make for four, eat for two and you have another night. That leaves you with one night a week to say 'berkeley it, I'm tired' and eat cereal. You start eating healthy home cooked dinners six nights a week and that one night won't matter. Is it important or not? Could you make time to spend 15 minutes a day with your wife? What if spending 15 minutes a day in the kitchen meant that you got to spend another 20 years with her?

mazdeuce wrote: Could you make time to spend 15 minutes a day with your wife?

Sometimes I barely get 15 minutes a week with her. I'm not kidding. I'm long gone before she gets up and she's sound asleep when I get home. Lot's of Saturday's are spent at work as well. And Sundays are for things I don't get to do around the house throughout the week.

I am taking notes however. Very good suggestions so far.

Start any exercise slowly, walking is fantastic. I know you mentioned your knees, but if you can walk, do it for 10-15 minutes every day, maybe squeeze it in on your lunch time.

Also for light exercise try Geocaching. It's exercise but you don't realize it till later, plus it's mucho fun.

Streetwiseguy wrote: Rule #1- don't eat beige food. Think about it...

A lot of girls are beige.

nicksta43 wrote:

mazdeuce wrote: Make a dinner menu for the two weeks. Buy the ingredients for those dinners. Fresh veggies and meats for the beginning of the first week, moving to frozen veggies and meats for the second. When the menu says chicken Alfredo on Wednesday, you have the ingredients, so make it. Wake up 20 minutes earlier and eat breakfast and pack a lunch. Don't eat food accidentally. You know you're going to eat three times today, plan for it and do it. It helps a LOT when your spouse is on board so it's a team effort. I've got about a dozen really quick recipes if you need them.

I would have to make all the food on the weekend. It's simply not going to happen during the week. Hmm, we did get a food-saver vacuum thing for Christmas.

I made sandwiches for the week, every Sun evening. put them in the fridge and just took one with me, along with some fruit, nuts etc ... each morning

nicksta43 wrote: Sometimes I barely get 15 minutes a week with her. I'm not kidding. I'm long gone before she gets up and she's sound asleep when I get home. Lot's of Saturday's are spent at work as well. And Sundays are for things I don't get to do around the house throughout the week.

After reading back through your comments, maybe it's not the diet that needs changing. Seriously, is what you do for a living worth being miserable and possibly making the wife unhappy?

If you never see your wife , you don't have a regular enough work schedule to fit in the maintenance activities that can keep you healthy, and you come home too worn out to do anything.....maybe it's time for a job change.

I know that's not really what you were looking for here, but it may be something to consider. Your job may be contributing to your early death.

I'm battling similar issues with blood pressure and triglycerides, even though I bike 50-100 miles per week. I found that far more than sodium or diet, my blood pressure was related to stress. Your job would certainly stress me out.

I've lost 30+ lbs in the last 6 months. As a results I've more than halved my triglycerides and dropped my BP almost enough to come off the pills. I got an app on my phone called Lose It and started logging everything I ate. Everything. It scans barcodes, makes it easy. Burn more calories than you take in, you lose weight. It also forced me to start eating more veg and fresh stuff so I could feel full and not be over calorie count. At present, my diet's probably 70% vegetarian and I feel great. I'm also suddenly at the front of the road bike pack instead of the back, so there are tangible results of the weight loss that keep me motivated to stick with it.

Lastly - you have to find something aerobic that you love to do - love it so much that you MAKE time to do it. There's no other way to make it stick.

Nike actually nailed it on this one: Just Do It.

Stop making excuses, stop repeating old behaviors, stop coming up with reasons why you can't, and just freaking do it. It takes a while for something to become habit, so give it 6 months at least. And most importantly, do what I say and not what I do.

I put 10 chicken breasts on the grill and hard boil 2 dozen eggs every Sunday then slice them cold and throw them over spinach salad with chick peas, olives, shredded cheese, glazed walnuts, cauliflower... tomatos... whatever else I grab that looks fresh.

I eat that for lunch every day. I eat a berkeleying lot of salad. I don't eat a lot of bread or red meat anymore.

I buy Edy's all natural fruit popsicles (pomegranate rules!) to replace my crazy love of ice cream.

My one weakness is beer. I have not found a suitable replacement so the only thing to do then is work out. Burn it doing something. Anything. Hike, bike, swim, walk ... whatever you can do for an hour every day w/o stopping.

Go to bed hungry. Stop cramming E36 M3 into your face 4 hours before bed. Chug water to feel full until you get used to it.

Chug water in general. Do not take in any calories drinking anything (except beer). Seltzer has fizz if you need to think you are drinking pop.

Never, ever drive past Five Guys exhaust vents when you are hungry.

That is all I got.

pinchvalve wrote: Nike actually nailed it on this one: Just Do It. Stop making excuses, stop repeating old behaviors, stop coming up with reasons why you can't, and just freaking do it. It takes a while for something to become habit, so give it 6 months at least. And most importantly, do what I say and not what I do.

this

Giant Purple Snorklewacker wrote: Never, ever drive past Five Guys exhaust vents when you are hungry.

or any BBQ place

nicksta43 wrote: Sometimes I barely get 15 minutes a week with her. I'm not kidding. I'm long gone before she gets up and she's sound asleep when I get home. Lot's of Saturday's are spent at work as well. And Sundays are for things I don't get to do around the house throughout the week.

Change this.

You need a day off. You need to spend time with your wife. You need to make more time in your schedule, even if that means something goes undone. Your stress level and relationship (which I usually find closely linked) are not what should have to give for the sake of everything else. Maybe you cut back hours at work. Maybe you look for a different job that gives you a better quality of life. Maybe you just pay a handyman, maid, or gardener to take care of some things around the house for you.

jonnyd330 wrote: This is a funny and great site. The food is really tasty even though its healthy and the guy makes you laugh. http://thugkitchen.com/

haha thanks for that, and the food on there sounds pretty damn good too.

Find something that will work for you that you can stay with.

It sounds dumb but I had good luck with Weight Watchers. It sounds stupid but having to write down and keep track of everything I crammed into my mouth was a big help. And the only other place with a scale that could weigh me was a truck stop.

I had a lot of the same problems you are having. I was always heavy but when I started working for the bus company and got married I put on a lot of weight. I started at 5'5" about 200lbs. Over the next 7-8 years I went up to 410. I ate fast food a lot, work different shifts every day and my wife came from a big family so nights I am home she'd still cook for 8 and I'd eat for about 6. Fortunately I ate pretty well, just too much so my blood pressure and such was always good. I also took a job that required me to stand 7+ hours a day a few years ago. A lot of days I could barely stand going home.

About a year and a half ago my sister talked me in top joining Weight Watchers. I have gone from 410 down to 335 and even though I'm still a fat mess I feel much better. I have more energy, my knees don't hurt and I can walk much further. I probably could have done better but with everything going on in the past year I really couldn't make that many radical changes. The biggest were watching how much I eat, and packing meals from home more and walking everywhere. When I take the train to work I try to leave early and walk form the station to my post. A few weeks ago I was doing about 1.5 miles a day with little trouble. A year ago I wouldn't have thought about it.

The biggest adjustment was bring food. I don't work from an office most days so if I am close to a depot I can bring hot food and warm it up there or else I bring a couple sandwiches and leave them in a coat pocket leave them in a newsstand or token booth depending on where I am. Having meals to go isn't as hard as I thought either. Like others have said when I cook I make plates for my wife and I and the rest is split into containers and frozen for us to take for lunches. You will also save a bit of money, I was surprised how much I spent in pizza and burgers.

Good Luck.

I'm starting to see a common theme here. Thanks for all the suggestions. It's gonna take some time but I'm hopeful that I can get my wife on board.

On the job front I'm hoping this year I'll be able to get it down to a more predictable schedule. I've been tagged for a promotion to production manager and if that actually happens it should change for the better. At least it's a hell of a lot better than it used to be, 36 days straight without a day off was brutal. Unfortunately, I never figured out how to make money any other way.

Hopefully your career path takes a better turn. I couldn't think of anyone that works that much other then a few lawyers, and they obviously have some extra scratch to make things a bit easier being time constrained.

In the last ~18mos or so I have dropped 30+lbs and have improved my health quite a bit. Just in that first 9 months my cholesterol dropped 20 and my bp dropped 10. I actually started to feel my age again instead of +10yrs. Now I think I'm in better shape then when I was 22.

I wasn't eating quite as bad/infrequently as you but definitely not making good choices. Diet things that helped quite a bit:

Lots and lots of veggies Lots and lots of nuts/legumes Some more fresh fruit Only whole grains Anything in a box/bag has to have a min amount of ingredients

Making sure I was eating three decent meals and two to three small snacks was helpful. Over eating your meals with long breaks is a killer. Make sure you get a good mix of fat and protein in your meals and snacks too to stay full. Nuts are great for that. All natural PB built into breakfast/lunch and some tree nuts during snacks goes a long, long way to staying full but not eating a lot.

For exercise my wife wanted to run so I joined in her training. Not a fan at all at first but I've caught the bug. The big thing there is find something you like to do, and do it. Then when you realize that it was hard/painful, figure out a way to train yourself to be better at what you want to do. For me it was getting back into playing intramural soccer at work. Not a huge goal, but I needed to be in much better shape to not die out there. At this point I'm working out in some way 5/7 days a week, and there's hardly a day I skip on a whim, it's just too ingrained and I'm too aware of the benefits.

As a start, find 30mins with the Mrs to go take a walk every day.

I travel for work - I can go to McDonald's and eat okay. I eat the oatmeal for breakfast or the parfait for a mid-morning snack. For lunch I might chow down 2 side salads and the chicken sandwich - always water. Then I eat an apple around the 3:00pm time. I also eat the Subway $5 footlong veggie sandwich, NO chips, and water. I also find I can quickly stop and run into a grocery store and buy 1 apple.

The main plan is I need to make wise decisions and if I do make a bad choice; I can start over the next day and I do not beat myself up. If we have some Cape Cod Potato Chips in the house I take one of our smallest bowls and enjoy a single helping of chips.

wbjones wrote:

Giant Purple Snorklewacker wrote: Never, ever drive past Five Guys exhaust vents when you are hungry.

or any BBQ place

Or Lee's Famous Chicken

Update;

It's been about a month since I posted this.

I have completely changed the way I eat and drink. I drink nothing but water except for the very occasional orange juice or maybe a glass of milk. I have been making my own food for lunch and breakfast. Lots of beans and rice as well as lots of salad and fruits.

I've cut out a huge amount of meats. I'm not vegan by any means but I have reduced my meat intake to almost 0. Thanks to whomever posted the link to thugkitchen.com I've used that site as well as a couple of my own recopies to make a huge change to my diet.

This morning I weighed myself at 193.3 compared to 207 a month ago. I have as much energy to do stuff as I did when I was 18. And I feel so much more awake and in the moment than I did. It helps to get more than four hours sleep a night.

I hope that this will continue. Not really to loose more weight but to continue to feel more and more healthier.

Thanks to all that posted.

nicksta43 wrote: I hope that this will continue. Not really to loose more weight but to continue to feel more and more healthier.