In reply to stuart in mn:
No I'm not listening to it loud. I mean literally I can barely hear it and she will text me asking me to turn it down. So I turn it down and go sit next to the speaker. The volume on my receiver goes to 50 I'm listening at 9-10. She just hates my music.
Here is what was recommended to me and seems to be working. I'll say I'm not finished with the room so any tests have been short term.
While they make sound proofing foam just for this purpose it's expensive, BUT if you go to the big box store and buy foam sheets from them you can get about 80% of that for a fraction of the cost. When you buy foam sheets there are 2 basic types. One is hard and brittle and one is softer and less brittle.
I am putting the softer foam over my studs and then sheetrocking over that. The concept is the soft foam isolates the vibrations from the direct transfer through the walls. I've also blown cellulose insulation in all perimeter walls.
Not only has it been great for summer & winter temps (this is my un heated or cooled upstairs), but it makes you feel like your ears are popping as you enter as it's so quiet. A boom box at full throttle can only be heard through the door. I'll be adding a shutter type door closure on the inside of the doors to stop that.