Jeff Bezos extortion attempt - perhaps a bad idea

Wally said:

I miss the Weekly World News. We never hear what Bat Boy is up to anymore 

He's on Broadway.  Well, Off-Broadway.   Waaaaaay off-Broadway.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bat_Boy:_The_Musical

Wally said:

I miss the Weekly World News. We never hear what Bat Boy is up to anymore 

I agree. I loved their headlines. On my first job out of college in '99 there were a couple guys at the plant who were chemical mixers and spent their days up in the mix room, basically the attic above the production floor. They kept subscriptions to WWN, Enquirer and a couple others to kill the dead time between mixing and cleaning and etc. I used to hang out with them and debate the stories of the day. I almost ordered a subscription to WWN when I left the mill. Seems like if they'd hung on a bit longer they would have made the jump to internet easily, landing somewhere between Cracked and Atlas Obscura.

The Enquirer will be the Enquirer, as it always has been. But if Big Jeffy hadn't photographed his poking dinky (Little Jeffy) and then posted said pics in an email to his paramour, then this debacle could have been avoided. I really thought he was smarter than that.

Big Jeff is likely smarter but clearly Little Jeff was making some of the decisions.   

It is starting to look within the realm of possibility that the Saudi government hacked his phone to hand off to Pecker to try to stop the Koshoggi coverage. And even if this is just blackmail over a d!kpic, ya gotta decide. Which is worse for society, a billionaire who has poor taste in selfies or a media giant that extorts or blackmails? 

I'll take a dick pic long before I accept extortion.

MEDINA, WA—Standing on the roof of his towering estate as the tiny machines buzzed all around him, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos reportedly set loose hundreds of Prime Air drones Friday to hunt down and retrieve the nude photos of him obtained by the National Enquirer. “Take your army and bring them back to me!” cackled Bezos, who is said to have thrown his arms into the air as the sky darkened and the motorized swarm tore across the land, tearing phones from people’s hands, destroying computers, and clawing out the eyes of anyone who may have seen the intimate “below the belt” images. “Grant no quarter to those who have gazed upon my hallowed member. Now, fly! Fly!” At press time, sources confirmed the drones had dumped the nude photos of several hundred thousand Americans on the CEO’s balcony.

https://www.theonion.com/fly-my-pretties-says-jeff-bezos-releasing-swarm-of-1832469973?utm_source=Facebook&utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF&utm_medium=SocialMarketing&fbclid=IwAR1B2RpYHqPi_0Su7ZIMG1Pkbf8AFj25bFbKXk7gFlGg88-Bs6tYay-ix4o

irish44j said:

In The Dark Knight, when someone says he wants money or he'll reveal Batman's identity, Morgan Freeman's character says "Let me get this straight. You think that your client, one of the wealthiest, most powerful men in the world, is secretly a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands...and your plan is to blackmail this person? Good luck."

........And then we have real life, when the National Enquirer tries to blackmail/extort Jeff Bezos, who is worth $137 billion dollars and the richest person in the world, and Bezos just goes ahead and publishes the dirt they have on him, like a boss.....

https://medium.com/@jeffreypbezos/no-thank-you-mr-pecker-146e392231

Uh, I thought he’s only worth $70 billion now since his ex wife took the other half of the $137 billion?

Sine_Qua_Non said:

irish44j said:

In The Dark Knight, when someone says he wants money or he'll reveal Batman's identity, Morgan Freeman's character says "Let me get this straight. You think that your client, one of the wealthiest, most powerful men in the world, is secretly a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands...and your plan is to blackmail this person? Good luck."

........And then we have real life, when the National Enquirer tries to blackmail/extort Jeff Bezos, who is worth $137 billion dollars and the richest person in the world, and Bezos just goes ahead and publishes the dirt they have on him, like a boss.....

https://medium.com/@jeffreypbezos/no-thank-you-mr-pecker-146e392231

Uh, I thought he’s only worth $70 billion now since his ex wife took the other half of the $137 billion?

He'd be in the top 10 in either case.

Oooh, internet sick burn!

Gary said:

The Enquirer will be the Enquirer, as it always has been. But if Big Jeffy hadn't photographed his poking dinky (Little Jeffy) and then posted said pics in an email to his paramour, then this debacle could have been avoided. I really thought he was smarter than that.

Meh, if I'm a mega-billionaire, I really don't care one bit if someone sees a picture of my junk (I'm going to assume for the sake of argument that his junk is reasonable in stature if he's sending pics of it to a woman, logically-speaking, so it shouldn't be much for general conversation, lol). So perhaps it's not a matter of smart, but a matter of "ok, so.....?" 

I mean, not like people are gonna be like "OMG, Jeff Bezos has a dick! I will never use Amazon again." People already knew about the affair, so it really doesn't change anything. 

Sine_Qua_Non said:

irish44j said:

In The Dark Knight, when someone says he wants money or he'll reveal Batman's identity, Morgan Freeman's character says "Let me get this straight. You think that your client, one of the wealthiest, most powerful men in the world, is secretly a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands...and your plan is to blackmail this person? Good luck."

........And then we have real life, when the National Enquirer tries to blackmail/extort Jeff Bezos, who is worth $137 billion dollars and the richest person in the world, and Bezos just goes ahead and publishes the dirt they have on him, like a boss.....

https://medium.com/@jeffreypbezos/no-thank-you-mr-pecker-146e392231

Uh, I thought he’s only worth $70 billion now since his ex wife took the other half of the $137 billion?

could be. can't say I've been following his divorce proceedings. Maybe I should read the Enquirer more often. 

Jay_W said:

It is starting to look within the realm of possibility that the Saudi government hacked his phone to hand off to Pecker to try to stop the Koshoggi coverage. And even if this is just blackmail over a d!kpic, ya gotta decide. Which is worse for society, a billionaire who has poor taste in selfies or a media giant that extorts or blackmails? 

That's one of the questions I have - how'd they get the pictures? Did Jeff's mistress forward them to the Enquirer? If not, did someone else get physical access to the phone, or was this the work of an outside hacker?

From what I've read it seems that it was some combination of his mistress' brother getting access to the phone and a hack of the cell network. Which is nothing special, the protocols used for cellular backend traffic are laughable ancient things protected largely by the need for special equipment and the lack of valuable uses (other than hacking 2FA, which I why I never use a phone number for 2FA).

Also from the description of the pics in the extortionate messages, Jeff was only sporting a semi, which I think makes it worse. If I were to have a dick pic leaked, I'd want it taken at MAXIMUM HARDNESS

MadScientistMatt said:

Jay_W said:

It is starting to look within the realm of possibility that the Saudi government hacked his phone to hand off to Pecker to try to stop the Koshoggi coverage. And even if this is just blackmail over a d!kpic, ya gotta decide. Which is worse for society, a billionaire who has poor taste in selfies or a media giant that extorts or blackmails? 

That's one of the questions I have - how'd they get the pictures? Did Jeff's mistress forward them to the Enquirer? If not, did someone else get physical access to the phone, or was this the work of an outside hacker?

The news I'm seeing is that's the entire question that Bezos was told to stop looking into.

And given the level of the news, it seems very much that it was not mistress or former wife forwarded pictures....  We will see.

Thread resurrection: MacKenzie Bezos gets 25% of Jeff's Amazon stock, making her the 3rd richest woman alive (and in history by privately owned wealth), and easily among the top 10 wealthiest women in history by any standard:

https://edition.cnn.com/2019/04/04/tech/bezos-divorce/index.html

On the men's side, Jeff Bezos will remain in first but is now within passing distance of Bill Gates.

And to answer Matt's question as to how Bezos' Dick Pics got out, it was his mistress' brother who did it.

Also, Bezos keeps voting rights to the 25% of his stock he gave is soon to be ex-wife.  She now owns 4% of amazon, but no voting rights on the stock.  He keeps all of the Washington Post and Blue Origin.

GameboyRMH said:

Also from the description of the pics in the extortionate messages, Jeff was only sporting a semi, which I think makes it worse. If I were to have a dick pic leaked, I'd want it taken at MAXIMUM HARDNESS

Dude, if it's only a semi-chub, you can still say "it gets bigger."  But if it's clear you're giving it all you've got, then there's no weasel room.

Yeah, if I had 100 billion dollars and someone wanted to blackmail me, the pics I publish will be FAR more lascivious.   Probably doing a Mr. Lifto routine with enormous stacks of cash!

”Honey, does this suitcase full of hundreds make my hootus look bigger?   I thought it did. 

Exactly.

You know how people talk about having "berk off" money?  Just enough that upu can tell whoever to berk off?  $70g is well within the realm of saying, blackmail me with a pic?  Here, I'm making it my Twitter background, berk you.