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SVreX
SVreX SuperDork
7/4/11 12:26 p.m.

I agree. The one tendency (that most concerns me) is the clingy insecure thing.

He could certainly make himself an enormous distraction.

SVreX
SVreX SuperDork
7/4/11 12:26 p.m.

Oh, and thanks, but my wife deserves more credit than I.

ditchdigger
ditchdigger HalfDork
7/4/11 1:09 p.m.
SVreX wrote: I agree. The one tendency (that most concerns me) is the clingy insecure thing.

Then why didn't you title the thread "Learn me on age innapropriate, clingy male suitors"?

SVreX wrote: He's a Marine, loves God and country, and seems to be dedicated and responsible.

Sounds like a wet dream for most dads

SVreX wrote: But he also speaks with a lisp,

Poor dude has a speech impediment and made it though high school let alone Marine boot camp? He must have a underlying level of badass to him. There is no way he got through that without having to stick up for himself more than a few times.

SVreX wrote: , likes pedicures and shoe shopping and dresses in themed outfits. Flamboyant.

Man, that must be a refreshing change from all the larry the cable guy looking freaks at the walmart and sounds much nicer than some kid with his pants around his knees and a ball cap on crooked.

SVreX wrote: He's 10 years older than my daughter and pursuing her like crazy. He's overdoing a lot- flowers every time they meet, poems, dozens of communications daily and they've only known each other for a week or two.

Ah love. It does make you do stupid things doesn't it? I once decided to be vegetarian to impress a girl. What was I thinking.

I have noticed a tendency in baptist faiths that age isn't an issue. My Cousin at the age of 19 got married to a 31 year old pastor and the church community was all happy. I remember being one of the few who was creeped out.

SVreX wrote: I'm trying to be encouraging of my daughter, but this guy has all my warning bells going off.

He makes you uncomfortable, Bums on street corners who try really hard to make eye contact with me make me uncomfortable. I understand where you are coming from. This doesn't make him suspicious though.

This all sounds like a story for a sitcom. Sort of like the Seinfeld "Close Talker" episode.

SVreX
SVreX SuperDork
7/4/11 1:23 p.m.

Sorry, dd. Can't agree with much of what you are saying.

Including the Baptist part (I'm not one).

I think you are just trying to get me riled up or be contrarian.

N Sperlo
N Sperlo HalfDork
7/4/11 1:30 p.m.
ditchdigger wrote: Bums on street corners who try really hard to make eye contact with me make me uncomfortable.

Really?

triumph5
triumph5 Dork
7/4/11 1:42 p.m.

Ask him if he's ever been in a serious relationship before, and what happened, and why. Also what he values in a relationship, and how does he see your daughter fitting those qualities when he's only known her for a couple of weeks.

Have a happy 4th!

You want to kill this quickly, have your daughters friends talk to her about him. At that age, peer approval means a lot.

ahutson03
ahutson03 Reader
7/4/11 2:53 p.m.

I wouldn't trust him for the fact that he's a 30 something year old lance corporal, sounds like he needs to focus more on work and less on poetry. Marines with pretty hands and toenails obviously aren't getting dirty enough, is he a paper pusher?

SVreX
SVreX SuperDork
7/4/11 3:14 p.m.

Yes, he's a paper pusher.

Marines require them too.

Grizz
Grizz Reader
7/4/11 3:20 p.m.
N Sperlo wrote:
ditchdigger wrote: Bums on street corners who try really hard to make eye contact with me make me uncomfortable.
Really?

I've never had a bum bother me. Mostly because I look like one myself.

ditchdigger
ditchdigger HalfDork
7/4/11 3:32 p.m.
SVreX wrote: I think you are just trying to get me riled up or be contrarian.

Nope. Just trying to show a different viewpoint. I really should try and use more emoticons. I really did see the avoiding the handshake and going in for the hug as a sitcom scene complete with laugh track and the dad with the Al Bundy face of horror

I think as a father your duties end if he is good to your daughter, treats her with respect and tries to do what is best for her.

If he is overbearing, and awkward that is up to her to deal with. Perhaps she likes that about him?

If he is just creepy and effeminate that would be her decision as well.

Then again this is all from across the country via a text based medium. I really have no idea what is going on or what the dynamic is. You probably shouldn't listen to me or anybody else here.

Chances are if he wants to have a solo meeting with you it is to discuss his intentions towards her.

Osterkraut
Osterkraut SuperDork
7/4/11 3:46 p.m.

Maybe he got burned in a previous relationship for being too "ruralsexual," and is now overcompensating?

mtn
mtn SuperDork
7/4/11 3:52 p.m.

Only thing that hasn't been mentioned:

Is his lisp a speech impediment or is he doing it on purpose? I know a few guys from middle school who could say their S's, but after coming out (or becoming metro) they started to lisp. Drives me absolutely nuts. I'd offer to pay for a speech pathologist to fix it for him.

SVreX
SVreX SuperDork
7/4/11 4:36 p.m.

I didn't mean to suggest he has a speech impediment. As far as I can tell, it is a chosen part of his persona.

SVreX
SVreX SuperDork
7/4/11 4:36 p.m.
ditchdigger wrote: Chances are if he wants to have a solo meeting with you it is to discuss his intentions towards her.

You are overestimating him. He did not request this meeting. I did.

MitchellC
MitchellC Dork
7/4/11 5:00 p.m.

21, Fulbright Scholar, interning overseas? Why haven't you ever introduced us? . Just kidding, it sounds like I'm out of her league.

I don't recall you mentioning how they met in the first place.

madmallard
madmallard Reader
7/4/11 5:59 p.m.

Almost every marine I know that went in in the last 10 years, while generally have an ethic and standard above most of the other people i know, are REALLY BIG DORKS.

One of my friends was telling tales about all the PT songs they've sung while running, including the opening theme to Pokemon, English and Japanese; and the Poke-rap. O_o

When did this guy go in?

RealMiniDriver
RealMiniDriver Dork
7/4/11 6:52 p.m.
tuna55 wrote: My oldest is three, so I have some time to figure it out. He's also a boy, so I can just smack him (I am joking, do not call DSS) if he gets out of line with a girl at that age.

No joke, we need more parents like you. Enough of this time-out crap. Spanking a kid when he steps out of line would do a lot towards improving child behavior these days.

But that's a discussion for another thread.

""

fasted58
fasted58 HalfDork
7/4/11 7:52 p.m.

At an intelligent 21 w/ school, travel and career ahead she should realize this guy as in all things passing. I know, I know advice to the young is wasted but she'll figure it out the hard way if necessary.

A 30 y/o should at least have a clue as to where her school and career path might lead and be realistic about it.

EastCoastMojo
EastCoastMojo GRM+ Memberand SuperDork
7/4/11 7:54 p.m.

I think your daughter is smart enough to know that he isn't the one but is enjoying the attention. I think she is going to meet a lot of age appropriate interesting people while she is away and her interest in his affections may wane.

Josh
Josh Dork
7/4/11 7:54 p.m.

Your daughter sounds like she might be an adult. This may be hard for you to deal with, but she's probably fine with it. Let her live her life.

mtn
mtn SuperDork
7/4/11 8:24 p.m.
SVreX wrote: I didn't mean to suggest he has a speech impediment. As far as I can tell, it is a chosen part of his persona.

I'd still ask him if he would be interested in speech lessons. Maybe make him quit the lisp (assuming you find it as annoying as I do).

Karl La Follette
Karl La Follette Dork
7/4/11 8:49 p.m.

bible = trouble

tuna55
tuna55 SuperDork
7/4/11 9:04 p.m.
Karl La Follette wrote: bible = trouble

Dude, comments like these cannot possible do anyone any good.

SVreX
SVreX SuperDork
7/4/11 10:00 p.m.
Karl La Follette wrote: bible = trouble

Thousands of honorable men with Bibles in their pockets have bled to death and sacrificed their own hopes and dreams in the wasteland of battlefields to protect your right to say asinine stuff like that.

Just a thought.

Zomby woof
Zomby woof SuperDork
7/4/11 10:16 p.m.

When you ask for advice on a very diverse forum full of car guys, accept that you're getting what you asked for, even if you disagree with it.

Just a thought.

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