Learn Me: Throwing a bachelors party

I've been elected to the position of best man and apparently this involves throwing a bachelor party. I don't think I've ever been to a bachelor party, let alone throw one. The groom didn't mention when/how many people but he did suggest he wants to go to the Bahamas "and fish, dive and get drunk". As the planner, I want to know....do I have free reign on planning what I think would be best? Who pays for this? Is there anything special I should know about? Do I just start booking E36 M3 and hope people can make it?

My bachelor party was the worst thing ever, so I have nothing to offer.

Midget strippers.

We drove go-karts and drank beer for my bachelor party (http://www.andrettikarting.com/). It was awesome.

Everyone pays their own way and ideally chips in to pay for the groom. If he wants a trip then he needs to pony up for airfare and hotel at least, then the group can buy him booze and food.

First things I'd do is figure out the size of the group. If it's fairly small, the group can get together and start deciding what's the best thing to do...and what's realistic. If the group is large, get a few of his closest friends and you guys decide for the group. Keep in mind that you have "final say" if you're the organizer. Is a trip to the Bahamas even realistic? If it's not, what else does the groom like to do? What's his personality like?

As for who pays, the group should pay as a whole. That's another thing to figure out up front. Budget. How much can you spend? What about the rest of the guys?

Just keep the groom and his personality in mind when planning. Don't let the guys plan the ideal bachelor party they'd like for themselves...plan one with him in mind. By time I got married, I had long since given up the wild party days and had no interest in it. So we went to a baseball game, then to Dave and Busters for dinner. They tried to coax me into a strip bar, but I politely declined. I had a great time overall, because they planned it for things I liked.

You and the other bachelor partiers chip in. You have free reign on planning and should probably choose something wilder than what your friend wants because it's not a proper bachelor party unless the groom is overwhelmed at the debauchery. Maybe fishing, diving and getting drunk WITH STRIPPERS?

Whatever you decide, DO NOT hand the groom a bottle of Wild Turkey and let him drink the whole thing. It's just not a good idea. Ask me how I know.

Get a Designated Driver no matter what happens. I couldn't make my friend's wedding because I was out of country, but after his Party he hit a bridge abutment. He's got a broken nose and two shiners in all the wedding photos.

I drank beer and Crown Royal shots at my Dad's basement bar with 4-5 buddies and my dad and younger brothers. We shot off bottle rockets at midnight and 3 of us hit a scary stripper bar in Lyons, Illinois. 26+ years later I still get queasy when I see that blue Crown Royal felt bag.

Keep it simple - Bahama's? Sounds like a lot of problems to me.

SilverFleet wrote: Whatever you decide, DO NOT hand the groom a bottle of Wild Turkey and let him drink the whole thing. It's just not a good idea. Ask me how I know.

Same reason I don't drink Jim Beam anymore?

nothing that requires passports.

find out if his fiance does anal. if not, make sure at least one of the "strippers" does.

slip him a viagra or two so he's got no excuse for not rocking the dooker of said "stripper".

that's all the stuff i can think of that's safe for work.

Grtechguy wrote:

SilverFleet wrote: Whatever you decide, DO NOT hand the groom a bottle of Wild Turkey and let him drink the whole thing. It's just not a good idea. Ask me how I know.

Same reason I don't drink Jim Beam anymore?

Probably.

I still have trouble drinking or smelling bourbon almost 2 years later.

The last thing I remember before blacking out that night was hanging out around a campfire in my friend's yard, falling to the ground and punching it, and yelling something about how I was stronger than nature and how I was going to punch gravity in the face. I also reportedly ran through the fire pit at one point, somehow avoiding catching on fire.

If the Bahamas thing doesn't pan out renting a party bus is a good way to go.

Everyone gets home safe, you can have whatever nastiness you want on the TV / DVD while you bar-hop, or examine the various "gentleman's clubs". It's also a lot of fun to pull up somewhere and have 20 rowdy guys get off the bus upon arrival.

While a little humiliation is appropriate, I wouldn't push the groom into doing anything he isn't comfortable with as far as the hired ladies goes. This is, after all supposed to be a fun time for him----- that should be the rule whenever you decide upon any destination / activity. Will it be fun for him, is this what he'd want.

Try to figure out what the ideal night would be for him, and plan accordingly. He may want to camp- alone with his buddies and have one last "boys night out", he may want to climb a pyramid of naked hookers while wearing a clown outfit......I dunno.

it isn't about you, or your other friends--- it's about making sure the groom to be has the time of his life.

Joe Gearin wrote: While a little humiliation is appropriate, I wouldn't push the groom into doing anything he isn't comfortable with as far as the hired ladies goes. This is, after all supposed to be a fun time for him----- that should be the rule whenever you decide upon any destination / activity. Will it be fun for him, is this what he'd want. Try to figure out what the ideal night would be for him, and plan accordingly. He may want to camp- alone with his buddies and have one last "boys night out", he may want to climb a pyramid of naked hookers while wearing a clown outfit......I dunno. it isn't about you, or your other friends--- it's about making sure the groom to be has the time of his life.

Yep, exactly what I was saying.

But wow Joe, that's quite a scenario you pulled out of thin air...climbing a pyramid of naked hookers while wearing a clown outfit. Speak from experience?

I can neither confirm, or deny the above

Make sure its planned ahead, I was best man for my brother and got saddled paying for everything for everyone. When I asked for some of them to chip in I was looked at like a cheap bastard. Took it in order to not ruin the whole thing, but really pissed me off.

I just went to a bachelor party last Saturday. It was very tame, as 14 of us played paintball from 10am 'til about 4 pm, and then cleaned up, and headed to a bar/pool hall to drink/eat/play pool. No strippers, or debauchery, but still fun. There was a lot more people at the bar/pool hall than paintball, but the paintball was loads of fun. Even though I got a pretty good tattoo on my leg from a paintball.

My bachelor party was really lame, but that was/is okay with me. No strippers either, but we did go to a casino for a few hours. I have been toa few partys with the stripper angle and while they are fun, it is a bit odd in my opinion. Simple is best if you ask me, but I am not a party animal at all.

AngryCorvair wrote: nothing that requires passports. find out if his fiance does anal. if not, make sure at least one of the "strippers" does. slip him a viagra or two so he's got no excuse for not rocking the dooker of said "stripper". that's all the stuff i can think of that's safe for work.

Wow, just wow!! "Say what" worthy?

An appetizer to set the tone - Skydiving, cliff diving... pufferfish dinner, whatever as long as you could die doing it. Then.. Hookers. Booze/Blow and heavy metal. Schedule a private nurse to administer fluids (ala Hangover Heaven) the next day while you sun at the beach.

It really isn't about the groom at all. berkeley him. His suffering hasn't begun yet.

oh, one more thing. don't have the bachelor party the same weekend as the wedding. gotta bake some recovery time into the plan.

AngryCorvair wrote: oh, one more thing. don't have the bachelor party the same weekend as the wedding. gotta bake some recovery time into the plan.

Best advice EVAR

Good stuff to know. Thanks everyone

First objective: round up the troops.

aussiesmg wrote:

AngryCorvair wrote: oh, one more thing. don't have the bachelor party the same weekend as the wedding. gotta bake some recovery time into the plan.

Best advice EVAR

Agreed!

Make sure there is at least a month between the party and the wedding, not only for recovery time, but just in case the shenanigans get out of hand and someone blabs about it to their significant other and then they tell the bride to be or others. This could cause serious issues, and you don't want to be dealing with damage control on the weekend you get married.

Personally, I would rather not have a bachelor party than have my dingbat friends plan something that would get out of hand and/or get me in trouble with whatever poor sap decided she would marry me.

I've always heard the most fun bachelor parties involve the least amount of drugs, liquor, and strippers. I like the go-karts and paint ball ideas. Hell, if I had a bachelor's party, it would probably involve hot laps around Summit Point or VIR.

Sky_Render wrote: I've always heard the most fun bachelor parties involve the least amount of drugs, liquor, and strippers.

There is a difference between strippers and hookers. That is probably why you heard that.

A track day for all the groomsmen is way more expensive than hookers and blow but if you can swing it... it's probably the smarter option.