Men and women sure do communicate differently

My wife has a habit of not explaining herself when she assumes I know exactly what she's talking about. I'm sure I do the same thing, but I'm the man of the house, I'm allowed, right?
Anyway, I've been telling her for years, when it comes to cooking (which she is very good at and has been doing it for a long time and thus, uses terminology that baffles me) she needs to talk to me like I'm a third grader. The other day she did it again, but I think I got my point across.
She said "Hey hot, studly DrBoost, whom I love more dearly than anything else on earth and is the light of my life (or something like that) I have to leave. Can you finish dinner for me"? "Will do" was my obedient, husbandly response. "O.K. then, it's easy. Just finish up the dumplings, blanch the vegetables, then put the dumplings on the chicken and toss it in the oven please."
It sounded like Charlie Browns teacher just asked me to "mwaamwamwamwaaaa ma mwa mwaamwa." I thought about telling her, yet again to please explain things like this to me, because blanch isn't something you do to veggies, it's a character on the Golden Girls. But I figured I'd make my point. I said: "Sure honey. I'll get on that right away. I'm a little busy right now though, so could you pull the drums off of the car and make sure the primary shoes and secondary shoes are installed correctly then get my bore-scope out and let me know how the cross-hatch pattern looks on the rear bank in the minivan?"
She said "huh!? Oh, alright. I'll write the directions down for you."
"Thanks" said Doc.

Men are from Mars.......

Amen

My wife LOL'd when I read this to her. She wants to send it to her friends. Seems you have hit on something universal. Cool wife, too.

This sounds exactly like my house, except my wife can't cook and I don't listen nearly as well as you do.

I would be ecstatic if she were on the same floor or in the same room when she issued the instructions...

Just sent your post to all the women in my life.

Is it bad that I know more about dumplings and blanching than knowing how to install primary and secondary shoes correctly?

I don't know how to blanche, but I am confident I could scope the cylinders correctly.

So we're hanging out in the shower, cleansing gel being used at an alarming rate. She's loping the mule and being vixenish.... "Do you remember at a Christmas party four years ago? You were talking to (somedamnbody) and you said (whatever) .

What did you mean by that?"

It dropped like a rock and I was looking for the exit.

What the heck is going on in your head?

Yes. Men & Women think differently.

That's rough. I think that's how a bear feels when he went for the steak set in the jaw-trap.

If I tried that I would have gone 3 weeks without sex....

and people wonder why I prefer to be single

ha ha, thats why I am teaching my daughter(5yr old) how to work on RC cars.

OK now just keep turning to the left and the shock will come right off. All right good job now letts fill it oil, ok now put the shock back now. Yes she can do this and she is getting better at driving it too

OK, I can do brakes. But make dumplings? Nyet!

Hah. Compare cookbook directions to car-fixin directions sometime. Betty Crocker gives you step-by-steps that a monkey could follow. Follow the directions exactly and you get cookies, no prob. Chilton just says, "remove transmission", and leaves you to fill in the blanks with swear words.

At the rate I'm going, I'll be baking bread and rebuilding engines in the same kitchen. Just have to stay out of wedlock.

FindlaySpeedMan wrote: Hah. Compare cookbook directions to car-fixin directions sometime. Betty Crocker gives you step-by-steps that a monkey could follow. Follow the directions exactly and you get cookies, no prob. Chilton just says, "remove transmission", and leaves you to fill in the blanks with swear words.

Voted up. "Say What?" worthy.

"reinstallation is opposite of removal"

FindlaySpeedMan wrote: At the rate I'm going, I'll be baking bread and rebuilding engines in the same kitchen. Just have to stay out of wedlock.

LOL - I had a 360 on an engine stand in the mudroom off my kitchen for a year. Really freaked people out, it was beside the freezer.

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=390822&l=3fd80e9e7c&id=515956307

Lesley, with all due respect, even I wouldn't do that...

Hell, when my future wife and I first got together, I had a BW T-10 4 speed (Aluminum, even) on the dining room table. Right next to my big roll around tool box. I didn't think there was anything odd about that, she did. Few months later, she and her daughter spent two days cleaning the house before she moved in. Tranny and tool box got moved.

Neither the wife or I can cook well. It's amazing we have survived this long.

In my single daze, I had a TT600 Yamaha in my kitchen and an MGB engine in my den. And no I'm not making that up or exaggerating.

My living room has a table saw and a chop saw in it. The floor is covered with sawdust. There's a stack of assorted lumber, a refrigerator, and two work benches, covered with tools.

Oh yeah.. and some spiders.

I rented an old farm house when I was in college. The kitchen was disgusting, so I pushed the new fridge into the dining room next to the microwave and parked my CB400F in the kitchen so it would be easier to start in the winter.

mad_machine wrote: "reinstallation is opposite of removal"

That's what she said!

cwh wrote: Hell, when my future wife and I first got together, I had a BW T-10 4 speed (Aluminum, even) on the dining room table. Right next to my big roll around tool box. I didn't think there was anything odd about that, she did. Few months later, she and her daughter spent two days cleaning the house before she moved in. Tranny and tool box got moved.

Only two days? Good job keepin' a clean house dude