Minor Confession Thread

So, the wife and I were in a Dollar Tree (bad enough to confess THAT), and I thought I needed to fart, so I let'er rip. I was wrong...

When I am the one picking out bananas, I try to buy some that are going to turn soon, or else buy waaayyy too many for the two of us. That way I know the wife will have a minor "freak out" and start making banana bread.

I also think she knows I do this, and yet has never said one word about it to try to get me to buy better or less bananas.

I don't have any idea what the whole "Bye Felicia" thing is about.

Duke wrote: I don't have any idea what the whole "Bye Felicia" thing is about.

Good, I thought it was just me.

edit: aparently this

Duke wrote: I don't have any idea what the whole "Bye Felicia" thing is about.

Had to look that up also.

Think I'm gonna use it.

I took a half day from work to port a throttle body and intake manifold.

Probably should have done it earlier.

I was at Wally World at lunch today when a lady my age was trying to pull a small box out of her cart and was struggling and she yelled at her mom that "she didn't want to pull it out".

Under my breath I said "that's what she said". I am always looking for reasons to use that line.

I had to meet someone at Starbucks. They insist on asking for a name to put on my cup. I've yet to give them a serious name but today's hit me as especially funny listening to the Jamaican cashier shout "Pat McRoin, Pat McRoin's hot chocolate is ready."

I was supposed to have a Cat Scan a couple of days ago, but it turned out that I didn't need to have it done. They told me to throw away the two unopened bottles of Moccachino Smoothie Barium Sulfate that I was supposed to drink on the morning of the test. They didn't want them back.

I was about to throw them out, but it looked too good not to try some first. It was not as yummy as you might think.

A few days ago I took a trip to Lowes to pick up a few tools. There just so happens to be a Chic-fil-a right in front of the Lowes, and I usually can't help myself. I got stuck in a pretty long line to get my food, and I had drank about 3 cups of coffee before leaving the house. Needless to say, nature started calling, and as soon as I put in my order I made a beeline for the bathroom.

As I entered the bathroom I fleetingly noticed that this bathroom didn't have any urinals. About halfway through emptying my bladder I got the sneaking suspicion that I was in the Women's bathroom. When I finished I made my exit and had my suspicion confirmed as I checked the door on the way out.

Please note, there was a lady in there dropping a deuce. I know she wondered wtf was going on when she heard a dude pissing in the toilet next to her! The good thing is I made it out without anyone noticing I'd just used the Women's bathroom. WIN!

I have no motivation to do anything. Including figuring out why I have no motivation to do anything.

In reply to AntiArrhythmic:

You know that could have gotten you arrested in certain locations.

In reply to spitfirebill:

He just has to say he's transitioning.

Transitioning from a full bladder to an empty one.

My farts smell like swedish meatballs today.

Lunch was delicious.

Personal finances are up, free time is down, and for the first time I've decided to buy (rather than build) a fast car. It feels like the death of a dream

My wife and I spent 5 days driving a 2015 Mitsubishi Mirage rental and we liked it (minus the CVT, a stick would make the car much better).

In reply to mtn:

I have 2 irrational fears in life, one of which is bagged bananas. I won't even go near a display of bagged bananas for fear of Brazilian Wandering Spiders.

In reply to captdownshift:

I thought that was dumb until you explained your reasoning. Now I don't want any bagged bananas either.

We are getting a harbour freight in town. Is it sad that I want to apply because it looks like fun?

Additionally, im secretly happy that I'm losing my job in February. I hate it and it's killing me.

Dusterbd13 wrote: We are getting a harbour freight in town. Is it sad that I want to apply because it looks like fun? Additionally, im secretly happy that I'm losing my job in February. I hate it and it's killing me.

I frequently think that a job at home depot or menards would be really fun. Or another one I often think about is construction (however I usually think about construction being fun when I see it going on in the spring and fall, on a beautiful clear day, not too hot out).

No need to be secretly happy about losing that job it sounds like you have now though. Even better you can prepare.

In reply to Robbie:

So construction in southern California

In reply to captdownshift:

Nailed it.

captdownshift wrote: In reply to mtn: I have 2 irrational fears in life, one of which is bagged bananas. I won't even go near a display of bagged bananas for fear of Brazilian Wandering Spiders.

My wife's friend won't buy toilet paper that isn't individually wrapped because she once had a spider crawl out of the tube of an unwrapped roll.

captdownshift wrote: In reply to mtn: I have 2 irrational fears in life, one of which is bagged bananas. I won't even go near a display of bagged bananas for fear of Brazilian Wandering Spiders.

A beautiful bunch o' ripe banana, hide de deadly black tarantchla. Sorry, couldn't resist