Dear Mucus:
Get the berkeley out of my lungs.
Thank you,
The host.
Dear Mucus:
Thank you,
The host.
corytate wrote: Why do people decide to ALL come for service one hour before we close? We did next to nothing all day, we close at 4, and 3pm rolls around and we have six damn tickets! it's ALWAYS either right before we close or between 11 and 1 or 2 pm. So we either can't clean up at the end of the day or we can't eat lunch..
Yep. Same problem here. Especially on Saturday. 
My raise was supposed to go into effect for the pay period that just ended. Since I never received the paper to sign for you changing my pay rate in the computer, I'm going to assume you didn't bother to put it through.
I was supposed to get this raise 6 months ago.
I could have quit like 4 other people did, and I'd be making $1.50 more than what I will if I ever do get the raise, but I stayed.
I'll give you one more week to get my E36 M3 straight, or I won't make the same mistake again.
You're having a hard enough time filling the 2 positions left right now, have fun filling 3 of them instead because you didn't feel like taking 30 seconds to update my pay information after I reminded you every single day last week.
Dear wife:
AAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
::gasp for air::
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAA!!!
Thanks, -Husband
This (or any comparables), Aint! got a damn bit of real butter in it!
Why is it when I am looking for a car, nothing good ever shows up. Then, when something finally shows up, the owner won't respond to you?
GRRRRR!!!!!!
Why is it that when there is a merge before or on an on-ramp, people scrunch right up on top of each other? Then, when it is obvious that you are in front of them and they should just let you in, they do so begrudgingly? Seriously?
If you mouth-breathing jackanapes would leave a little berkeleying room, we could just zip right on the damned freeway and get the berkeley to work. Instead, you're penis-related issues and need to tweetify your book face immediately causes all of us to crawl along the on-ramp at 10mph until we get to try and enter the freeway, which BTW is flowing at 60mph. I don't know about you, but a 2001 Highlander 2.4L just isn't quite powerful enough to make it to 60mph in 30 feet, nor is your big diesel pickup. I do know that if you don't get that stove-pipe looking pile of E36 M3 out of my way, I will run it over with said Highlander because I do know how to drive and what Wide berkeleying Open Throttle looks like!
berkeley!
Auto-driving cars can't some soon enough for these mouth breathers.
Dear Department of Veteran's Affairs,
ANSWER THE BERKING PHONE!!!!!
Sincerely,
Taxpayer you took $11 million from last year for a call center.
In reply to Javelin:
+elventy billion
And don't think they will be able to actually be able to help you if they do answer . . .
"Current wait time is 29 minutes"
First answer in 3 weeks!
49 minutes later I get in and find out that my stuff submitted on 1/23/12 wasn't processed into acceptance (basically meaning they acknowledge it's existence) until 9/19/2012. Berk you!!! I was nice to the poor call lady and she stuck a note on it to have it changed (everything is processed by the date of application).
Robo Calls
It's not a boost to the economy when the unemployment rate goes up. If you have an ad for a car and I e-mail you, please respond. That thing sticking out to the left behind your steering wheel....that control's your turn signal, please use it.
Dear USB flash drive makers,
Why do they have to be so damn small now? I bought 2 drives that I promptly lost.
Dear Self,
Buy Ginko Biloba. Buy Ginko Biloba. You went to Costco with a list of 4 things including Ginko Biloba to help with your memory. You still forgot.
DuctTape&Bondo wrote: Dear USB flash drive makers, Why do they have to be so damn small now? I bought 2 drives that I promptly lost.
Since they are so cheap, that is why you buy 10 of them to have lying around rather than 1 big one 
I'm not the berkeleying dog catcher.
Not really a rant, just a "sigh this was a rough weekend wrenching" things took longer than they should have for no real reason. Or "I'm not as good as I think I am" incompetent mechanic status.
Spent a big part of Saturday trying to get my friend's 2002 S10 running. He parked it for several months or longer (was running when parked) and bought a new battery, would crank and crank but not start. Changed out his plugs and wires (damn that #3 plug and steering rack) after some trips to the auto store and tool hunting didn't get much accomplished other than that. Still wouldn't start. Starter fluid in the intake manifold, crank crank, crank, only made a nice pop. Had spark, tested it by doing the spark plug wire with spark plug to negative on battery. Called it a day, defeated.
Yesterday went to change the #2 lower control arms on my IS300. Had to go hunting for a torque wrench as the 2 I have don't go over 150ft/lbs. Ended up renting one down the street at O'reillys after driving all the way to Harbor Freight and not wanting to pay the $80 to buy it. Went to torque the chassis brace back on and stripped 2 of the mounting holes. Berk you, O'reillys torque wrench. Was able to dig around and find 2 bolts that were the same thread pitch and size but longer, and was able to get it to work. LCA's went in pretty easily just too bad I had to take it apart like 4 times before finishing that "simple" job.
At least I was able to paint my chassis brace a nice blue, looks pretty cool even if I'm the only one who ever sees it.
Today my buddy says he tried to start the truck and it came to life on the second try. Nothing was changed or touched since I left it Saturday.
What not to say to people when you don't know what their job actually is:
What the hell, man. Don't they pay you to do this?!
Oh, I had fun with that one....
Man in Wilmington, NC had been charged with 11 previous DUI's, convicted 8 times, hits & kills a tow truck operator in Carolina Beach and leaves the scene (3rd time for that), caught 9 miles later. Charged with 2nd degree murder.
I work in a shop full of conspiracy theorist... They all gang up on me trying to make me sound crazy by laughing at me by bringing up the most ridiculous "evidence".
....Moon landing was fake....9/11 was an inside job....JFK....Lincoln is on the only "brown" coin "facing the wrong way"....
Only one that I can even see some sort of strangeness to is the whole JFK shooting.
Yeah.... I am crazy because I find it hard to believe that NASA was able to pay off thousands of people to keep their mouths shut...I was in the military and know how hard it is to keep ANYTHING low key, even a war coming.
In reply to Anti-stance:
Psssst... we have telescopes that can see the buggy and tracks on the moon right now. I'm not sayin' they are wrong - just that if we didn't make all that mess up there.... then it's a huge alien/government cover-up and Tom Cruise is probably involved.
Leaves in the damn gutters suck. That's all. Next time I will get those Leaf Guard dealies, they might be $$ but are still cheaper than a hospital stay.
In reply to Anti-stance:
The more you research something, the more evidence you will find. It doesn't mean it's right.
N Sperlo wrote: The more you research something, the more evidence you will find. It doesn't mean it's right.
Evidence: A body of facts.
When it's not - it isn't considered evidence. Antonyms for evidence include disproof, heresay, refutation and contradiction.
Earlier we discussed Hanlon's Razor. Moon hoax theories require a pass thru Occam's Razor. Among competing hypotheses, the one that makes the fewest assumptions should be selected. It would be more difficult to successfully fake a trip to the moon than to just go there.
I'd still go for the Tom Cruise Xenu angle to screw with them.
Daylight savings time. berkeley Ben Franklin or whomever came up with this idea. Starting today all the way through to sometime in the spring I will not really see the daylight except on weekends. Driving to work in the dark was ok for the past month or two, but now there is no chance of ever getting off work before it is pitch black outside. What is the purpose of this? Some BS about more time for farmers or something? The farmers around here don't seem to work on a timeclock...they work all the time, even harvesting corn with their combines before 0530. Damn the darkness.
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