Minor windfall, how to deal with it.

In reply to KyAllroad (Jeremy) :

And this is the exact reason I stepped away from the zoo when my grandmother died and just took nothing. I knew my relatives were notorious for this kind of crap and didn't want to be involved. Funny thing is they split land in Pennsylvania. About 5 years later, They couldn't sell it and the EPA came in and said there was an oil spill cleanup needed from drilling on the land 50 years ago. The bill was more than the land was worth.....Whoop. 

In reply to bmw88rider :

Dude, I'd love to do just that.  But while I'm able to stay afloat on my bills I'd really like to be able to get ahead just a bit.  My finances have had me basically treading water since my divorce and being a 20 year fed I can't really walk away from my career in search of a more lucrative one.  I drive modest cars and live in a very modest house, getting this minor windfall is positively HUGE for my sister and I both.

I don't want to risk alienating my step-mother since she's sitting on my late fathers' estate which we are in line to inherit at some point (a couple of very expensive houses) I'm just surprised by my uncles sneakyness.  Nobody came to me and said anything, just went around to an elderly lady and bullied her into giving up the money.  And honestly if the agreement was that the uncle got an extra share for taking care of grandma I wouldn't be terribly opposed to him getting it out of my fathers' estate when it gets liquidated.  But for the now I need the money and he really doesn't.

mazdeuce - Seth said:

What does your emergency fund look like?

Save it. Your life will let you know what it needs soon enough. 

+1. 

In reply to KyAllroad (Jeremy) :

That really sucks.  If I didn't know better, I'd say you uncle watched his portfolio drop last quarter and saw this as a way to regain those losses, regardless of the consequences to others. 

If your inheritance is stated in a will, sue.  If it isn't, get a side job.

It's a E36 M3ty thing, but you may well be berkeleyed.

RevRico said:

At least I'm not the only one with a E36 M3 bag uncle I guess.

Everyone has at least one.  Also aunts.  Let's not be sexist and acknowledge both genders can be disgustingly greedy.

Edit:  I had written something longer but decided to redact it and simply say this:  Many people will have horror storries about family turing absolutely vile when it comes to equitably splitting an estate.  It's terrible.

In reply to KyAllroad (Jeremy) :

Sorry it went sour for you. I haven't been in line for any inheritance but have watched it affect my cousin's and in laws. It just fascinates me that those same people who can't believe X did this or Y did that don't have a will for themselves. So they are essentially dooming their kids to same confused infighting. Based on my most recent family deaths I watched one go very smooth as the will was simple and put one person as getting everything with instructions to liquidate everything and make any and all decisions. All the rest of the family stayed at bay. Another has zero documents and the kids agreed to all but one thing which is making it sad to be around them as they snipe at each other over it. 

If it wasn't in a legal will then you have little to go on.

Since it sounds like the deal is done. Maybe  turn the family politics to your favor and ask your uncle to invest in your son's 529 $15k or something. Maybe that will pull on enough family feelings for him to give up some of the money. Make it about skipping you and instead investing in the next generation. That is what one of my extended family did to avoid tension. Everything goes evenly to the grandkids and great grand kids of the deceased.

Sorry man..

My wife’s uncle absconded with her grandmother’s estate while she was in a nursing home. Around a million dollars withdrawn nine grand at a time (he had power of attorney for medical). He put both his kids through college, also bought a couple Mercedes SUVs, and likely copious amounts of hookers and blow. Told family he was a director of HR but in reality he hadn’t worked for about over two years. People suck. 

Not only is having a will a good idea, but it's one final act of love you can do for your family.

ALSO

Once it's written, have a reading or send those involved a copy, but they need to know what they're getting before you pass away.

The image that comes to mind of a lawyer reading it to the family in a walnut office with the mistress in the corner and the widow crying, is pure Hollywood.

Hate that this has happened to you, man. Money can bring out the worst in people.

KyAllroad (Jeremy) said:

John Welsh said:

As for the point about steady govt work, I can put you in touch with some Federal workers this week... 

Very true.  Fortunately the VA is pre funded.  Apparently something about shutting down the VA hospital makes even the most hardened political scumbag quake in his loafers.  

Optics anyone?