NOT the right gift for a teacher

Disclaimer: This is still a developing situation, and I'm still somewhat in uninformed rant mode about it.

So, yesterday my wife joined the small fraternity of educators who have had a kid bring a gun to school. Third grade. Girl. It was am airsoft gun, but a highly realistic one, and when they're being waved around on the bus I can imagine it would be hard to tell the difference. The kid (who my wife said was her #1 pick she had if any of her kids would ever go off the deep end, so at least her gaydar for psychos is working) never actually made it to class, but was interdicted by school personnel after the bus gun waving around incident.

Here's the punchline (and the part that we're still a bit unclear on): It looks as if the county only has protocols written for what to do if a middle or high-schooler brings a gun to class. Since there are no guidelines for elementary schools, the county appears to want to follow the "letter of the law" and do nothing. As it sits, the kid is supposed to be back in class Monday.

Needless to say, Dana doesn't want her back. She doesn't feel threatened, but she absolutely doesn't need the educational or discipline distraction that a kid who just days earlier was brandishing a weapon at her classmates would bring.

So, hopefully the county makes some good decisions and gets the kid some real counseling and gets her the hell out of regular classes for the rest of the year. We're not a school system that traditionally has its head up its butt, so my hope is they're just taking things slow so they can minimize any late-year panic and avoid hysterical parents at school board meetings.

I told Dana that the solutions to her problems are but one anonymous email to the local news away. I'd never recommend going that route, but I'd sure recommend her hinting that she knew she could play that card if they try and put the kid back in her class.

Anyway, that was my post-work "hi honey" chat yesterday. She emailed me around noon and just said that a kid had brought something "highly inappropriate" to school because she didn't want to say too much on her work email. Of course, we were wracking our brains all day to figure out what it was. We narrowed it down to Fleshlight, scorpion or Koran. Three strikes for us I guess.

You should've let us take stabs (inappropriate?) at what the item was to see how many guesses it took to come up with gun.

moparman76_69 wrote: You should've let us take stabs (inappropriate?) at what the item was to see how many guesses it took to come up with gun.

Of course that was our first reaction, but we figured that she'd have said something, or it would have been on the news. On one hand I kind of get the county wanting to not create a panic, but at the same time the kid obviously needs some real help, and to not be in a general ed class.

Wow. In this county, a kid was suspended for having a butterknife in her lunchbox, allegedly planted there by her big brother. I think she was in second grade. Zero tolerance here for knives, and that includes elementary school. Pretty sure the incident you described would have resulted in expulsion here.

So it wasnt a fleshlight, scorpion or koran?

I must say that is the weirdest game of three items I've heard of.

Early in my teaching career, a student held another student in a headlock with a knife to his throat. Said it was all a "joke" afterward. I wanted the kid out of my class, but the admin didn't want to pull him, and the union would not support me, because (get this): "the student was not on a behaviour contract beforehand."

So apparently you get one freebie.

1988RedT2 wrote: Wow. In this county, a kid was suspended for having a butterknife in her lunchbox, allegedly planted there by her big brother. I think she was in second grade. Zero tolerance here for knives, and that includes elementary school. Pretty sure the incident you described would have resulted in expulsion here.

A berkeleying butter knife? Isn't that a bit over the top?

Zero tolerance is just a fancy way of saying "I don't want the burden of having to apply logic, so let's just let the "rules" decide..."

ryanty22 wrote: So it wasnt a fleshlight, scorpion or koran?

Speaking of which, I do not really understand the point of the Fleshlight. I mean, I understand the point, just not the disguise. It's like it's for people who are ashamed to masturbate, but not ashamed to have sex with a small household appliance.

Like, if you get caught using it you're supposed to say "No, it's okay, it's just a flashlight."

That actually makes it much, much worse.

JG Pasterjak wrote:

ryanty22 wrote: So it wasnt a fleshlight, scorpion or koran?

Speaking of which, I do not really understand the point of the Fleshlight. I mean, I understand the point, just not the disguise. It's like it's for people who are ashamed to masturbate, but not ashamed to have sex with a small household appliance. Like, if you get caught using it you're supposed to say "No, it's okay, it's just a flashlight." That actually makes it much, much worse.

Your a good straightman, I pictured someone talking about that in a dry factual tone and almost spit my drink out (that wouldve been bad, alcohol abuse) off topic, Coors Batch 19 isnt bad at all

Because Miata is all i can say...

Datsun1500 wrote: We went from the consequences of bringing guns to school to the merits of screwing a flashlight in 9 posts. Well done. Here is my issue with the original dilemma. Reverse the situation. Your older kid does something wrong and the school makes up a punishment, do you have a problem with that? If there are no punishments on the books, what is fair? That being said, if my kid brought a gun to school, I'd make sure they got help, and would not send them back for the last few weeks of the school year, it's gotta be close to the end.

You sir, made beer come out of my nose

Inquiring minds still wonder what the kid brought to class today? All that being said we had a student bring a small 22 pistol to school a few years back and accidently fired off a round in the bus on his way home. Never showed anyone and would have "gotten away" with it if he hadn't been fiddling with it in his pocket on the ride home. He was gone from school for a few months. Apparently he had no malice, was afraid to go home alone due to a recent break in and he had to gun to protect himself. There is still a bullet lodged in the side of the bus to this day.

I know I'm going to regret this, but:

What's a fleshlight?

In reply to Basil Exposition:

It's a pocket Bob Costas shaped like a poorly made flashlight.

I think over here in Putnam County, the kid would be expelled for not bringing a proper gun to school.

In reply to Basil Exposition:

Linky

What happened to this country

I'm a decade out of high school and even then it was still normal to see pickups in the parking lot with firearms in full display......I blame the fear based society we've become and toys being made to look like the real thing.

Seriously, this bullE36 M3 needs to change. A third grader(whom is obviously just seeking attention) and doesn't understand what is even going on is certainly not going to be a threat. A child that age will seek out attention any way they can. I'll bet she doesn't understand what has been seen 24/7 on the news but sees the "excess of attention" displayed.

Cliff notes for the rant: Tell your wife to just sit down and talk with her student after class. Chances are all they want is someone to talk to.

Slap the kid on the wrist and move on but keep an eye on her actions to see if there is an underlying problem or if she just brought her older brother's TOY to show off.There has been excessive over reaction lately to young kids drawing pictures of guns, pointing their fingers like guns, wearing NRA t-shirts etc, etc, etc that seems to have created a phobia of guns.

It's not healthy

yamaha wrote: What happened to this country I'm a decade out of high school and even then it was still normal to see pickups in the parking lot with firearms in full display......I blame the fear based society we've become and toys being made to look like the real thing. Seriously, this bullE36 M3 needs to change. A third grader(whom is obviously just seeking attention) and doesn't understand what is even going on is certainly not going to be a threat. A child that age will seek out attention any way they can. I'll bet she doesn't understand what has been seen 24/7 on the news but sees the "excess of attention" displayed. Cliff notes for the rant: Tell your wife to just sit down and talk with her student after class. Chances are all they want is someone to talk to.

This x2

In reply to ryanty22:

It took me a few tries rewriting to subdue my post to be acceptable here, but it definitely needed said.

ryanty22 wrote:

yamaha wrote: What happened to this country I'm a decade out of high school and even then it was still normal to see pickups in the parking lot with firearms in full display......I blame the fear based society we've become and toys being made to look like the real thing. Seriously, this bullE36 M3 needs to change. A third grader(whom is obviously just seeking attention) and doesn't understand what is even going on is certainly not going to be a threat. A child that age will seek out attention any way they can. I'll bet she doesn't understand what has been seen 24/7 on the news but sees the "excess of attention" displayed. Cliff notes for the rant: Tell your wife to just sit down and talk with her student after class. Chances are all they want is someone to talk to.

This x2

We're both with you on 97% of this, but the talk needs to be given by someone removed from the situation. A resource officer. Counselor. Social worker, etc. Our camp believes what the kid really needs is quality help, and that starts objectively.

And Dana is much less concerned with the threat of gun girl than the distraction it would cause the other 19 kids in her class who still want to learn for two more weeks.

most kids are already checked out with only two weeks left. if hers arent she is a phenomenal teacher.

I used to take my shotgun to school, on the bus. Had to give the clip and bolt to the driver. Needed the shotgun to go duck hunting after school with my history teacher...

And I'm a Canadian.

Streetwiseguy wrote: I used to take my shotgun to school, on the bus. Had to give the clip and bolt to the driver. Needed the shotgun to go duck hunting after school with my history teacher... And I'm a Canadian.

When she started in this county she was at a MUCH more redneck school. Kids were all sons and daughters of ranchers, or the folks who fixed the equipment for ranchers. Without fail, she'd have several kids come to her desk Monday morning and mention they had bullets in their pockets. It got to where she took a locking ammo box from home and would check in and check out extra ammo the kids had. I think a lot of the "accidentally" forgot and brought a whole bunch so they could go hunting right after school without going home first. But those kids had been raised in a world where guns were tools that, if responsibly used, yielded both fun and practical benefits.

Watching the news I can't believe i never went off the rails. I was a fat red headed kid that was on the rifle team and spent most Saturday nights in my room enjoying the lovely Dr Quinn medicine chick. Apparently it was a miracle I never became an Afterschool Special.