Never had a problem handling physical pain, I've torn ligaments, broken bones, been cut to the bone, shot with a nail gun. Had four fingers on one hand smashed with a 5 lb sledge and coworker swinging full on. Never bothered me, in most cases i finished what i was working on before even thinking about my specific injuries let alone seeking medical help. Treated myself on most occasions. But emotional pain is a different beast all together, they both hurt, but the second one is pretty damn near paralyzing. Can't do E36 M3 don't even want to move sometimes. Just something i am troubled by not being able to wrap.my head around.
Welcome to the club, hopefully your problem is temporary and easily solved.
Sorry to hear it man. Emotional pain fades a bit with time. Lots of time.
If I may suggest, don't give your mind a chance to dwell on the source of the pain. Hard work, books on cd instead of music, bourbon, talking with a good friend. Find something to let the feelings out/away so they don't wear grooves in your mind.
BTDT
The body can't move without the mind. I'd much rather break my hand than my heart.
DrBoost
UltimaDork
9/16/14 6:22 a.m.
Don't be too proud to seek professional help. Anti-depressants can help you get moving again. On that note, don't rely on them. They can be VERY hard to come off if you've been on them too long.
I'm on prozac, it helps but I have good days and bad days with it. Seems like it wears off in the late evenings though I need to get into the dr and see if he thinks it needs to be adjusted
In reply to ryanty22:
Yes, please. We've just had a horrible incident to a person related to this board with mental health. Please take the warning sign of your posts that you need to work with your doctor some more.
You may want to talk to a therapist. Prozac may not be best for you. There is Celexa, Xanax etc. Differnt drugs work better / worse for different people. Don't just see an MD. Go and see a therapist or a psychologist. Although Therapists (MSW) can't prescribe drugs, they can work in tandem with your MD and make a recommendation to the MD for a drug. There is no stigma in going to a professional for help.
Also don't discount diet. I don't know what you eat, but try making a concerted effort to cut out/down on junk food and sugar. Doing that can make a huge difference.
Good luck. Hang in there.
Sleep was key for me. I could get through the days OK but when my mind started to dwell at night laying in bed it would keep the sandman away. This led to more problems mental and physical. A short term prescription for sleeping pills was a gift from the FSM when I broke down and saw my doctor.
ninja edit: Country Music is NOT your friend.
I'm like you: Punch me in the face, but don't rip my heart out and stomp on it.
Physical activity's worked well for me in the past. Most of the time I use my garage as my "therapy". The Alfa is my "project so huge I never have to worry about not having something to work on" but before that it was an RX-7.
Before I had a garage it was a bit more difficult finding an "outlet". I remember once I just started jogging (straight up Forest Gump style). I had been pacing around my unfurnished apartment for god knows how long before I finally strapped shoes on my feet and out the door I went (no direction in mind). It was dark already when I started (and a bit wet IIRC) and I don't remember how or when I decided I was good to head home, but I remember being so completely exhausted when I got back that I collapsed on the first chair I could get myself in (sun was coming up too).
That was always my key (being exhausted) otherwise I wouldn't sleep and if I wasn't sleeping then I was laying in bed dwelling on whatever it was (girls, bills, work, life... etc)
Hope whatever it is passes soon man.
The
HalfDork
9/16/14 8:58 a.m.
Talk to anybody about anything, I have battled it for 30 years, I find human interaction and staying busy helps. Let your family know you are not feeling well and let them know its not physical. You have people who care about you and they want to know if you are feeling this way. I have a lot of trouble in public, restaurant's or whatever and my people know so often times one will whisper is this ok? It makes all the difference in the world and helps you coupe they won't think any less of you. But you have taken a big step by typing it out on this board. PM me if you need to shoot some E36 M3.
mtn
UltimaDork
9/16/14 9:40 a.m.
The wrote:
Talk to anybody about anything, I have battled it for 30 years, I find human interaction and staying busy helps.
Ding ding ding.
I used to have to force a friend out of bed to come with me to go out to eat, or to a hockey game or party. She was extremely depressed and in a bad place with nothing to look forward to. Take her out doing something--movie, restaurant, or just a park--and she'd perk up for that while, and when we got back, would be in a better mood than when we left.
I hate the thought of "Just buck up, happiness is a choice" becuase that is false on a chemical level. But it was true that if someone made her go out and do something fun or different, she'd have fun too. Might only be a temporary distraction, but it does help quite a bit on the whole.
Adrian_Thompson wrote:
...Prozac may not be best for you. There is Celexa, Xanax etc. Differnt drugs work better / worse for different people. Don't just see an MD. Go and see a therapist or a psychologist. Although Therapists (MSW) can't prescribe drugs, they can work in tandem with your MD and make a recommendation to the MD for a drug. There is no stigma in going to a professional for help.
This is good to remember. I have a loved one on Prozac, and she found that her body responded very differently from one brand to the next. Same medicine, same dose, different effect. Apparently this is commonly known as an issue.
A good doc should be willing and able to adjust doses and medications to get you feeling right.
One day at a time. When I'm in a bad spot (often), let your self do whatever it is that will get you through the day/night. (Provided it's legal and not hurting yourself). The next day focus on getting back to 'normal' routine.
Went through a long rough period a few years back. Sunday nights were the worst, someone always got phone call from me.
Healing is horribly slow, took me a solid 3 years. You will get there. Therapist/MD, etc no shame in that.
oldtin
UberDork
9/16/14 10:00 a.m.
Timing of meds can matter too and is something to talk to your doc about
October 6th 2013 I checked myself into a psych ward for suicidal thoughts and depression. I know there are all kinds of physical hurts, but emotional hurt trumps it all.
I have walked a half mile on a broken ankle, duct-taped gashes so I could finish a project, and water skied with a dislocated knee. But when I was messed in the head, I dropped a brand-new dream job and checked in.
I'm with you.
Rufledt
SuperDork
9/16/14 11:43 p.m.
Add me to the list of people you can pm if you need to talk about whatever. Seriously, I'm not just saying that. Really pm me if you think it has any chance of helping. You can even just talk about cars if you want a distraction.
I agree with you 100%, I'll take a broken bone over depression any day. I've broken bones, lost plenty of skin, had to be pinned back together, once all at the same time on 3 separate limbs (A supremely bad june 4, 2004 for me. Yes I remember the date despite all of the pain meds, at least my skull and right leg made it through without damage). I'll take that over feeling so down I never want to get up. I went through it bad for a few years. It's still a daily battle but having my wife to talk to is probably the reason I'm still typing right now.
You know where to find me. I'd start by taking Adrian's suggestion, though. Watching my wife on different meds taught me a bit.
As I said when my Nephew killed himself. The body is an amazingly resilient thing. It can recover from wounds that should have killed it several times over, as long as the will to live is strong. Once that will is gone, it all falls down like a house of cards.
I am sorry you are going through all this. It is not fun, it is not fast, and it too leaves scars.. but not the kind you show somebody and brag about. I am not going to tell you to "stay strong" I am going to suggest you find help, either professionally or with somebody you can have a good cry with. Tears are natures way of healing, but you need to let them out to do their work
Some very real and some very good advice in this thread. I suffer from anxiety moreso than depression, but I've been there too man. You're never alone, and there are always people to talk to. Seeking counselling was a Godsend for me. Know that there will be good days and bad days, and it will make you mentally stronger to deal with the latter.
I can't remember who said it, I think it was actually a comedian, but it has helped me through some down times before- Experiencing depression is terrible. You feel the lowest of the lows on a very paralyzing level. But remember that in this world every 'down' has it's equal and opposite 'up'. Even in the pits of despair and depression, find solace in the fact that you will be able to experience the highest of highs that most people will be unable to conceptualize. It will happen, and embrace them when they come.
Good luck. You are loved. And just think of it. This tiny part of the internet.. a billionth of a billionth of goings on in the world. Look how many of us have been in your exact same position. You are NOT alone. You have NOTHING to be ashamed of. You have us.
Keep busy.
A walk in the fresh air and sunshine may help.
Break down and cry.
Find something new to occupy your time.
These worked for me. Three different times.
You guys really are all the greatest. I am trying things to relax working helps during the day. Just that time where your trying to go to bed and though whiz around your head at about the speed of a f 1 car most of them are mistakes I've made in my life, things that have come home to roost regardless of how I've changed as a person over the years since I've made said mistakes. The kids keep me moving and force me to keep my head above water they are literally a life saver.
Just remember that some people know about mistakes and are still behind you. E36 M3 happens. Family is Family.
Add me to your list of people to reach out to if you need to. I've been in bad spots emotionally and like others have said, there's no shame in that. Mistakes are the things we dwell on when we are in that low spot, but pulling through and taking from that what you can, will get you to the next high spot. There are lots more high spots for you in life, and you will know them and appreciate them more for being where you are now.
We are here for you. And I for one, am not giving up on you. I will drive out there and make sure you know that if you need it. Don't ever give up. No matter the odds. You are not alone.
iceracer wrote:
Keep busy.
A walk in the fresh air and sunshine may help.
Break down and cry.
Find something new to occupy your time.
These worked for me. Three different times.
This is far more succinct than the rambling diatribe I probably would have pit here. Over the years I stumbled across these as the best course of action. If only I could have just had this as a starting point than the trial and error process of bullE36 M3 that took me so long to wade through.
What I try to do is instead of internalizing and pushing problems/issues/adversity and things down and not dealing with them is to recognize them and use them as fuel or motivation for what you want to do or achieve.
That's hustler though, everyone works through their things differently and at different paces.