Since GRM knows everything.. Help me properly finish my black suit for a black tie event

The event is a museum opening gala on Thursday evening in a city a 3 hour flight away. That means I've got until Wednesday night, maayybe Thursday morning to settle it.

Basically, I've got a nice, very well fitting, black suit paired with a very nice, white, pocketless white shirt I'll be wearing.

I have acquired a very nice traditional necktie in black with some texture to it that works very well with the suit.

The goal is basically to survive the event without being a giant visual faux-pas. I'm part of the team that did the exhibition design, so I have a minor amount of flexibility in style matters, but corresponding more pressure to look good.

The rabbit hole starts with the bow-tie of course. I have no problem acquiring a real one (correct length, tied yourself), but it gets complicated with what next. Most style guides point out that you need a waist covering to go with black tie since the bowtie leaves so much open white shirt visually.

A cummerbund won't look right with a traditional suit, will it? I kind of doubt it.

That leaves a waistcoat/vest. I cannot match the fabric of the suit with a new vest/waistcoat any longer. Almost everything I've learned about fashion (and design) points that if you cannot match a fabric/texture, then you need to add some contrasting element to make it look more intentional. Is that then too informal, though?

I could always just go with the bowtie and no waist covering, but would that look even worse when my jacket is open/off?

What's the fashion input of GRM?

I'm no expert fashionista or anything, but I really thought that "Black Tie" means tuxedo. Black Tie Optional means a dark suit or a tux.

If you're not going to wear a tuxedo, I would do a three-piece. You could probably get away with a waistcoat that was somewhat contrasting to the suit if you used a matching pocket square.

But if it's "Black Tie", I'd wear a tuxedo.

I am bad at fashion. (I'll start with that). I noticed something recently, and had a minor epiphany. If I was going to try to get into fashion, this is what I would do:

1. Find a celebrity who has similar build to you (they have to exist for just about every person), and dresses in outfits that look good to you.
2. Search for photos of them at similar events. Someone somewhere probably even listed what they were wearing or who made their suit.
3. Copy and steal relentlessly.

Not far from me we have a really eclectic tuxedo shop - they sell used tuxes dirt cheap and have vintage stuff from the 50s-70s. They have mild to wild (plaid tuxes...). Maybe there's something near you. Otherwise waistcoat in a highlight color and matching bow tie or a funkier look of waistcoat and ascot (basically a tie with matching ends).

Being of Scots descent, I'm a big fan of vests with blacktie. Note: a waistcoat is 5 buttons high in the front (shorter/shallower "V", showing less shirt), and a vest is 3 buttons high (longer/lower "V" showing more shirt). A dark, solid contrasting color is acceptable, provided the bowtie matches the vest color.

Does your shirt have extra holes to put in your own buttons?

Then you can get some black cuff links and black buttons just like most rental tuxes.

Like this

There's not really time to acquire a tux and get it tailored. No way a rented tux that fits even ok, looks as good as the tailored suit that fits really well.

The suit is a go.

I'll check the shirt for extra holes as soon as I get home.

Upper-scale tux rental places can really make this happen. Tailored or not. If you're anywhere near a medium to large city, I'd be shocked if you couldn't find a place that could make you look very good on very short notice.

If you're set on the suit, try to find a tuxedo shirt and do the black buttons and cuff links as shown in the photo above. Depending on the cut of your suit, many might not notice the difference between it with a tux shirt and a real tux.

If you want to try a waistcoat, something in a dark gray with a little texture could work; you'll need to take your suit with you and try on the candidates WITH your suit. Odds are strong, though, that you will end up looking like a somewhat stiff pimp, or maybe a refugee wearing multiple unnecessary layers, since your suit is likely not cut correctly to wear with a waistcoat.

At the end of the day, if the event is black tie, you need a tux. If you choose not to wear that, then really better to own it and wear a nice conventional black tie and good shirt because, you know... you didn't wear a tux.

Margie

Eh, you're better off just owning the suit rather than trying to make it look like something else. You might fool some folks that don't get out much, but the rest will be able to spot the difference easily and you'll kind of stick out. Plus, you'll know and that sort of thing usually makes people less confident and uncomfortable. On the other hand, if you've dressed up the suit (without trying to make it look like anything but a suit), you'll still look good and you'll just wear it better because, again, you'll know.

I'd call ahead to the city you're going to and find a menswear store that can get a rental tux in time. I would be absolutely astonished if you're going to a city of any moderate size that there wouldn't be at least one store able to accommodate you. It's not very hard to take your own measurements if you don't have them already or you can go to a local store and have them take your measurements for a few dollars. Big bonus to that is that you don't have to worry about anything getting wrinkled or forgotten on the trip and you'll have less baggage. You can bring your own cufflinks and tie (a lot of rental places don't have bow ties, just the goofy clip-on things) but unless you've got them already (and if you don't have a tux, you probably don't), wear their shoes.

Found some pics of the original expansion opening back in '09. Tom and co. went with the suit/tie combo. I doubt I'd be able to rock it as well as they do. hmm.

bluej wrote: Most style guides point out that you need a waist covering to go with black tie since the bowtie leaves so much open white shirt visually. A cummerbund won't look right with a traditional suit, will it? I could always just go with the bowtie and no waist covering, but would that look even worse when my jacket is open/off?

Cummerbunds... ugh. If you're sticking with a black suit instead of a tux, just make sure to keep it buttoned whenever you're standing.

To be fully honest, I bought a new black suit specifically for this event since I didn't have one (black) and wanted to be able to use it in the future. I also knew that my co-worker/immediate supervisor was planning to wear a black suit (not tux) as well. Now at the last minute he's not able to attend, leaving me with.. significant heartburn.

I would say based on those two pictures, that event is not Black Tie. Making some assumptions about what the rest of her attire looks like, the lady in the background of the bottom picture doesn't appear to be in a formal evening gown, and the man either screaming or yawning next to her is most assuredly not properly dressed for Black Tie. Doing some other searching, it looks like Tom Brokaw was in a tux back in '09.

The real question is what the invitation says. If it says "Black Tie", then tux it up. If not, then suit. And there's no way that New Orleans doesn't have a shop that can accommodate you and have you looking like a million bucks when you hit the ground.

I'm not sure where you are getting your fashion advice, but they are way off. The rule for a black tie event is that you DO NOT remove your jacket. A bowtie is fine all alone, provided that you KEEP YOUR JACKET ON. Here is how you will look:

Taking off the jacket immediately makes you look like the waitstaff:

And unless you are a groom or groomsman or in 1850, you DO NOT wear a cummerbund.l.

See how they all look the same? Because there are rules man, keep the jacket on.

If you are of athletic build, you can add a vest. The only other acceptable accouterment is arm candy. This would work:

pinchvalve wrote: (stuff with pictures)

QFT.

a few more pics from '09. some were in traditional black-tie, others were not. http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/voGL0XFWvFv/National+World+War+II+Museum+Expansion+Grand/browse

In terms of arm-candy, the two of my female co-workers attending are pretty attractive, so that'll help.

Yeah, that's optional black tie. Your well-tailored black suit, with a dark-colored conventional tie, will look awesome. And you will feel comfortable in it all night, which is rule one to looking good.

Margie

Marjorie Suddard wrote: Yeah, that's optional black tie. Your well-tailored black suit, with a dark-colored conventional tie, will look awesome. And you will feel comfortable in it all night, which is rule one to looking good. Margie

Thanks all, I appreciate the input. My senior boss just confirmed that I won't be the only one there in a black suit, so the above sounds perfect. I'll probably pick up a bow-tie just to be safe.

Thanks again.

I'd do the suite and tie personally, or possibly a vest that matches the tie if you want to be over the top.

Is there an REI in town?

I would pick a matching tie and vest and your suit if it is tailored to fit you. I have a horrendous fat body but I bought a suit to cover it and it generally looks better than poorly fitting rentals on people with better builds. Being comfortable in it I also keep my tie and jacket on like an adult while others have abandoned their tux jackets usually to show everyone they also have a vest with no back on it.

Just the bowtie was perfect.