Some nonsensical rambling is mixed with newer information in this post.
So I was just going to drop this thread because frustrated and annoyed. But then my phone rang this morning, and around the stabbing pain in my shoulder, I heard Her Father has had an epiphany.
Apparently the 203k loan we inquired about yesterday mircaulously went from "Around 4%" to 7.5%. BERK THAT NOISE. So he took himself a look at the stuff for sale in the county, and saw the deluge of foreclosures that would need repo loans, the $100k trailers, and the houses in the hood, and decided that things would be a lot easier if he just bought the house cash and had us pay him back. The way Dana expected it to happen a few months ago when we started looking. Not his preferred way, obviously, but definitely the easiest way for us, in the short run. This does, I think leave a window open for a cashout refinance in the future, but those rates are ridiculous, and I'm one of those people expecting another 2008 level financial crisis, so probably not a thing that will happen.
He would want $600/month, without charging us interest. We would be paying him $750/month, plus $5k at tax refund time every year. Either one of us alone can manage those payments, and while it won't help our credit, it can let me focus on fixing Dana's in the meantime.
As I was typing this post, I got calls from the realtor. We have lost our spot in line, and there is a higher offer than ours based as a rehab loan, but with us offering the $89k in cold hard cash instead of a risky loan, it seems about 50/50 again.
I'm not getting my hopes up again, I've learned that lesson repeatedly, but it does seem like it may work out for us. While I do want this place, badly, I have already accepted that it could be several more years until we actually move if this place falls through. Theres just nothing worth buying even above our budget. We will NOT live on top of our neighbors, we will NOT live in a trailer, and I will NOT have less working/parking space than I do now. That rather limits our options, but it seems ridiculously stupid to spend house money on something no one wants. I'm already miserable, I'm not going to pay to downgrade.
So now it's back to playing the wait and see game. I think I'm going to shutoff everything but the xbox come end of business today until Monday, just to distance myself and unstress a bit.