This car is a 5 speed?(when staying in 4th)

could you use at least 3 of the 4 cyl?

are you sure you need that much room to stop?

how long have you had your lincense?

"Drive like you mean it!"

Is it really necessary to take the car to redline right after starting it?

Really?

HANG UP THE berkeleying PHONE BEFORE YOU KILL US BOTH!

STOP LOOKING AT THE NEIGHBORS NEW PATIO AND FOCUS ON PARKING THE CAR BEFORE YOU HIT MY berkeleying CAR!

and recently I did actually say, "This is why I told you to plan ahead when driving in the snow, if you had been paying attention you'd have started slowing at the beginning of the block instead of in the middle and we wouldn't have slid through the red light."

I haven't had my "lincense" for very long, but I take a lot of room to brake because I would rather ease on the brakes than accelerate TOWARD a stop, then jam on the brakes.

I try to keep my mouth shut. Therefore, I came up with the counting game. When you see something in the road that need a reaction, start counting to yourself, stop counting when the necessary reaction is made. See how high you can count without getting killed. Try to beat your old records.

It's the skinny pedal on the right!!!

Put your "bowl" down and put your hands on the steering wheel. (Oh wait, that was 1978)

btp76 wrote: I try to keep my mouth shut. Therefore, I came up with the counting game. When you see something in the road that need a reaction, start counting to yourself, stop counting when the necessary reaction is made. See how high you can count without getting killed. Try to beat your old records.

Hahahahahahahahaha... I love it

See, my old technique was to close my eyes, breathe deep and just pretend everything is going to be okay, but I really, really like this spin on it.

My response to slopy parking jobs:

"That's OK, I don't mind walking to the curb from here"

From this weekend "I guess your eyeglass prescription changes a lot after you have the baby." and "I guess my depth perception is a little different than yours" in regards to her running up onto traffic at 70mph in a snowstorm.

RX Reven' wrote: My response to slopy parking jobs: "That's OK, I don't mind walking to the curb from here"

"That's alright, I can hail a cab from here"

PeterAK wrote: It's the skinny pedal on the right!!!

I say that far too often!

I just yell general obscenities because nobody ever seems to notice speed limit signs, people are never going the correct speed because they never notice when the speed on a street changes.

After someone pulls a boneheaded or even dangerous maneuver in traffic, I like to give them a big ol' thumbs up. Pisses 'em off WAY more than giving 'em the bird. I used to have a small white sign with a 9.2 on it. I would hold it up as if I was judging their maneuver. Got a lot of laughs from everyone who saw it. I should make another one of those.

I want to die quietly in my sleep, not screaming like your other passengers.

Upon receiving some of my constructive criticism (or backseat driving, depending on your perspective) I've had people ask: "Do you want to drive?"

I usually respond with, "No, I want you to do it right."

I just keep hitting the imaginary pedals on my side.

MiatarPowar wrote: Is it really necessary to take the car to redline right after starting it? Really?

Hahahahahahaha

I yell at other drivers... a LOT. I do it with my windows up, though :) I find the yelling vents the frustration.

"The one that makes the engine LOUDER!"

"You're in an SUV, why the HELL are you going that slow over a speedbump!?!"

"MOVE IT, PRIUS!"

"It's a berkeleying ONRAMP! GOOOOOOO!"

"There's a TURN lane for a reason!"

"You DON'T have a stop sign...."

One of my new ones I seem to be using a lot: "berkeleying HYPERMILERS!!!"

"GO, JUST GO!!"

"Slow traffic, keep right"

"The long pedal makes it go!"

The thing that drives me nuts the most: People who think they're helping by slowing down, waving you through or giving the right of way to you when by all rights, they had it. These people don't seem to realise that they actuallly screw up your timing more than they help. There are other cars coming besides you, don't stop, don't slow down, don't hesitate. Just go and my timing will be fine.

Shawn

My favorite is what I get while towing the race car on a trailer. The interstate will inevitably go down to 2 lanes out of urban areas. You've got a line of cars passing in the left lane, you in the right lane, and someone getting on an on-ramp.

And instead of punching it and making it out well before you're close, they slow down to a stop at the exit of the on ramp... Are they going to go? are they going to be completely retarded and actually stop on an on ramp? Will this cause a huge accident? No one knows, but we're about to find out...

"OMFG JUST GO!!!!!"

I actually used "it's the long skinny one on the right!!!" followed by "move it or lose it grandma!" following a caddilac down an on-ramp onto I-20 in Atlanta. I passed as soon as I could and lo and behold, it was a little old lady in curlers leaning forwards to see over the berkeleying steering wheel. Seriously?

edit: sorry to use such harsh letters

John Brown wrote: From this weekend "I guess your eyeglass prescription changes a lot after you have the baby." and "I guess my depth perception is a little different than yours" in regards to her running up onto traffic at 70mph in a snowstorm.

Science says it is: http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/133575.php

Men consistently outperform women on spatial tasks, including mental rotation, which is the ability to identify how a 3-D object would appear if rotated in space. Now, a University of Iowa study shows a connection between this sex-linked ability and the structure of the parietal lobe, the brain region that controls this type of skill.

"the sign says YIELD, NOT Surrender! "

"hey theres a frenchfry in the back seat (while looking forward)" when I get the inevitable "huh??" i just answer, "i can see it from here your so far up the car in front of us ass.."

the little stick on the left works the blinker...

Jeez, where do I start?

1: put that damn texting phone down and pay attention! Side note: if some CrackBerry addicted idiot clobbers me, well, the officer taking the acident report better call EMS to have said electronic toy removed from the owner's dumper.

2: why oh why is it necessary to drive that HNumberYuDitionQuoia 95 MPH in highway traffic that's averaging 80? Deduct additional IQ points if it's driven by a woman with 14 kids and a dog inside and has a 4 foot diameter Christmas wreath tied to the radiator air intake.

3: Do you not understand that the 80,000 pound 18 wheeler has left that immense gap in front of their rig so they can stop in case of an emergency? It's not so you can zip across 5 feet off their front bumper, slam on the brakes and turn into the fast food joint for your morning artery clogger. On that one: yesterday I saw an idiot in an Exploder cut across the bow of a tandem axle dump truck in 50 MPH traffic, then the driver slowed for a turn. The dump truck did a big smoky 270 and then whipped back around. The driver pulled off into the center median, probably to scrape his underwear out.

: put that damn texting phone down and pay attention! Side note: if some CrackBerry addicted idiot clobbers me, well, the officer taking the acident report better call EMS to have said electronic toy removed from the owner's dumper.

You know what I've always thought funny? If someone was to actually hit me causing damage that had to be repaired on my car, they better hit me hard enough so I am going to a hospital. Otherwise, they are getting punched in the face!