Tough Times Ahead for the Next Few Weeks...

I don't know how many of you great peeps remember, but I lost my wondermous wife last year. 

https://www.legacy.com/obituaries/thestate/obituary.aspx?n=michelle-motchos&pid=192373368&fhid=38826

It is hard to believe that it has been almost a year...

She had been suffering from a long-term illness that nobody thought was leading to an imminently mortal problem.  Then the worst 6 weeks of our lives happened...and I was suddenly alone after the best 24 years of my life with her and facing the reality that I may have an even longer time to go it alone.  To add more misery, those horrid 6 weeks included my birthday, her birthday, and our wedding anniversary.  Well, my birthday arrived this week so the second suckiest 6 weeks of my life have started.  Please lend me your strength in this difficult time...

Thanks,

Steve

We're with you man. So sorry for loss, dont forget how lucky you are to have had someone to love so much. If you need someone to talk to hit me up. 

Steve,

Losing your long time partner is painful beyond words.  It sucks.  But in time it does and it will get better.  At some point you'll find that memories bring a smile instead of pain.  Takes a while - you need to get past grieving and that just takes time and that's just the way it is, but it does get better.

All the best to you,

Jim

I can't imagine the hole that has been left and am praying you find joy in spite of it. 
sounds like she was a pretty amazing person!

In reply to Carbon :

I am very grateful for the FANTASTIC 24 years we had together & although the last 10 months have totally sucked, I would ABSOLUTELY do it all again even knowing that I would wind up where I am today. My only regret is that I can't spend the next 24 years with her.

We're here for you.

ouch, I can only wish you all the luck in the world. This is not something I would want to even consider going through

In reply to jwagner :

Jim, you sound like the voice of experience. If so, my condolences to you on your suffering. Yes, it does get better every day, hence my comment that this is the start of the second suckiest 6 weeks of my life.  It has been a challenging year, but things are improving.  The relative proximity of these "key" events is having an adverse impact on my mindset, but things are better than they were.

We're here for you. Words cannot express my sympathy for you.

In reply to jfryjfry :

She was too awesome for a poor sap like me, but somehow we worked. Thanks!

Brett, mad_machine, & Javelin,

Thanks for you thoughts & prayers. It's folks like you that make this place special! 

We're all here for you man. Sending good vibes your way.

The first anniversary of a huge loss is terrible. You relive the loss. The second anniversary is somehow softened by the fact that you relive the loss and the first anniversary. Every anniversary after that seems to create a softening as they stack between now and the loss. Never really goes away, and the softening effect is different for every person and every event. It took me a few years until I started to sort of welcome the arrival of another anniversary in my case. I still hate it, but I appreciate that it does it's job. 

Be sad. Talk to your friends. See if you can get a tiny sliver of comfort out of it. Just that is a lot for the first year. 

Steve, I haven't lost my wife or even been close, but I can't imagine the pain.

I will say from losing both parents that Jim is right above.  The memories are still raw and you will never lose all the hurting... but you will reach a point where it stops blindsiding you and you can see something that reminds you of her and it will bring more fondness and love than sorrow.  And then you will reach a point where most of those things bring that smile and no pain.

It doesn't mean you're forgetting.  It means that rawness is healing.  It will happen in its own due time.  In the meantime, you have all the friends here.

Steve, she sounds like an amazing lady. I'm so sorry for your loss.  I'm here for you as well, feel free to reach out at seven34-six34-six5sixsix.

Hey Steve, we are here for you. Keep venting when needed  and keep her in your heart. It sucks she is gone but it sounds like you guys had a good run together and not everyone gets that lucky. 

Definitely keeping you in my thoughts!

Very sorry for your loss!

I’m sorry man. I can’t even begin to imagine

I think you have the best community right here on the interwebs for support and for people to lean onto and help you power through. 

I can't imagine how much you must be hurting. The pain you feel is a testament to how strong that bond was between the two of you.

Sending you good thoughts and hoping you find comfort knowing that all of us here are wishing you the best.

Not much can be said.

Positive vibes sent your way.

Thanks everyone! Even though I've only met a few of the folks on here dxman92 hit it on the head, this is a very special place & I do feel like I'm among friends. That is why I felt OK sharing here. Y'all are the best & your support is helping me cope. Thanks for your virtual shoulders!

im not great with words, but I can hand model. 

Mndsm said:

im not great with words, but I can hand model. 

That's glove modeling, and it's not the same.